The moment Frieza's Legion arrived, the whole scene took a wild turn.
"Minions! Show these small-time Avengers hillbillies the highest honor of the Frieza Force!"
Apocalypse, the mutant progenitor who once tried to rule the world (and for the American context, let's call him En Sabah Nur), was currently wearing a ridiculously tight, suffocating white and purple battle suit and yelling with a look of pure fanaticism.
The next second, under the stunned gaze of the Avengers, the X-Men, and billions of viewers worldwide, this group of ruthless super-villains moved.
"The Ginyu! Force!"
Apocalypse took center stage, standing on one leg, dramatically spreading his arms wide, his blue face radiating confidence and disdain.
To his left, Magneto (Erik Lehnsherr) was half-crouching, forming two exaggerated 'V' signs with his hands, equally self-assured.
To his right, the Black King (Sebastian Shaw) and the Juggernaut pulled off their classic poses.
Even Loki gritted his teeth and adopted that famous side-profile, hip-jutting stance, reminiscent of Geese Howard (a fighting game character often known for a dramatic pose).
In that single moment, even the dust motes hanging in the air seemed to freeze in utter embarrassment.
Floating a hundred yards above the ground, Frieza (Fu Li Zha) watched the unique formation below, his lips twitching violently.
He instinctively lifted two fingers to gently rub his temple.
"Oh dear, oh dear…"
"While this is the exact move I taught them, and the reproduction is perfect," Frieza silently groaned in his mind.
"Seeing it live… the sheer level of cringe is off the charts! No wonder the original Lord Frieza looked like he was fighting the world's worst constipation and turned bright red when he saw Captain Ginyu and his crew do their dance."
The sight was just too much to handle.
But, Frieza peeked through his fingers and saw Captain America's face—a look that suggested he had just swallowed a pound of flies—and his mood mysteriously improved.
"As long as I'm not embarrassed, everyone else is. Ohohoho… This kind of mental trauma is a perfectly valid way to defeat the enemy."
However, some people on the ground clearly hadn't learned that silence is golden.
"Pfft—!"
An extremely ill-timed snicker shattered the stillness.
Spider-Man (Peter Parker), wearing his red and blue suit, was crouched on a piece of rubble. He was seriously nervous, but when he saw that, his mouth just couldn't stay shut.
"Uh… I know now might not be the best time to say this, but no offense…"
Peter pointed at Apocalypse and the others, who were frozen mid-pose, his masked eyes squinting, one larger than the other.
"This is the elite squad of the Cosmic Emperor? Are you guys performing the latest circus act? Maybe 'The Five Twisted Eggplants'?"
"Seriously, God help us, those poses are a million times dumber than anything I've ever seen from the cheerleading squad back in high school!"
That line was like a spark dropping into a powder keg.
Apocalypse's already blue face instantly turned pitch-black.
Maintaining his single-leg stance, the veins on his forehead wiggled furiously like earthworms.
Humiliation!
This was the greatest shame En Sabah Nur had ever experienced in his entire life! Playing the scared puppy in front of that terrifying blond demon was one thing—after all, he really couldn't beat him.
But for a little punk kid to mock him?!
"You seek death!!" Apocalypse roared, not even bothering to drop the pose, as he thrust his hands forward.
WHOOSH—!
A terrifying psionic storm instantly took shape, whipping up countless pieces of rubble and blasting them towards Spidey like buckshot!
"I'm going to rip your tongue out!"
"Whoa!" Peter yelped, his Spider-Sense screaming bloody murder.
He quickly shot a web line and swung into the air like he was on a jungle gym.
"He's mad! The big blue guy is totally throwing a tantrum!"
However, Apocalypse's attack didn't stop.
He shimmered, instantly appearing where Peter was about to land, and brought a glowing energy blade down hard.
Just then, a voice boomed:
"He's one of our kids! You leave him alone!"
CRASH!
A deep, gravelly shout cut through the air. A massive fist made of orange rock flashed in, slamming heavily against Apocalypse's energy shield.
It was The Thing (Ben Grimm) from the Fantastic Four.
"Perfect!"
Apocalypse was not surprised; in fact, a cruel light flashed in his eyes. He was itching to vent his suppressed frustration and earn back some respect in front of his master!
"If you all want to die, I'll gladly oblige!"
"Nobody interfere! This rock pile is mine!" Apocalypse barked at Magneto and the others behind him, then grabbed The Thing's wrist.
"Compared to my Lord Frieza, your rock skin is brittle as a potato chip!"
CRACK!
Apocalypse exerted force, activating his mutant ability to manipulate and reorganize matter.
The Thing's famously tough, hard outer shell actually began to crack and crumble in Apocalypse's grip!
"Aargh—!" The Thing cried out in pain.
But Apocalypse showed no mercy. He grabbed the hero by the ankle and slammed him into the ground like a rag doll.
BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!
Once on the left, once on the right.
Deep craters appeared in the ground, and debris flew everywhere. The Thing was completely overwhelmed, unable to fight back.
"Banner!!"
The Thing spat out rock dust as he yelled toward the back:
"Bring the big guy out! I can't hold him much longer!"
Further back, behind a barricade of ruins, Bruce Banner was huddled in a corner, his face pale and slick with sweat.
He heard The Thing's desperate plea and saw the brutal reality of the battle.
But…
"No… I can't…"
Banner held his head, his voice trembling:
"Hulk… Hulk won't come out…"
"NO! HULK NO!"
In his mind, the usually fearless green monster was curled up in the corner of his consciousness, shaking his head frantically like a terrified child.
Banner furtively glanced up at the sky.
Up there, Frieza was watching the show, his arms crossed, a look of amusement on his face.
The terrifying pressure emanating from Frieza's very soul made the Hulk inside him want nothing more than to find a hole to crawl into.
"He… he's afraid of the blond guy…" Banner said in utter despair.
In the previous fight, Frieza had flicked the Hulk a few times with his fingers, completely shattering the Green Goliath's self-confidence.
That absolute difference in power had utterly broken the Hulk.
"Blast it all!" Tony Stark cursed. "Even the big green lug is chickening out?"
In front of them, The Thing was now pinned beneath Apocalypse's foot.
Apocalypse's hand was pressed against The Thing's head, and blue energy was surging wildly.
"This is the fate of all who resist!"
Apocalypse watched The Thing's head begin to crack, a cruel, predatory grin—one he never dared show around Frieza—spreading across his face.
"Die!"
"BEN!!!" Reed Richards and Sue Storm screamed in desperation.
This sight deeply stung the cornered Banner.
Friend.
Ben was his friend.
Even though they hadn't known each other long, that sense of camaraderie—of two people who were both considered monsters—made Banner feel The Thing's pain intensely.
Seeing The Thing's head about to be crushed, and seeing the looks of utter disappointment on his teammates' faces, a surge of unprecedented fury erupted from the depths of both Banner's and the Hulk's hearts.
"Hulk…"
Banner's eyes began to glow green, and the veins in his neck bulged.
In his mind, he roared at the cowering soul:
"Look closely! The one who's beating us is not the blond guy! It's the ugly blue guy!"
"That blue guy is messing with our friend!"
"You're scared of the golden one, but are you scared of the blue one, too?!"
"Are you really a coward?!"
This last insult seemed to flip the final switch on the Hulk's dignity.
In the conscious space, the Hulk abruptly lifted his head, two jets of angry steam blasting from his nostrils.
"Hulk… no fight blond guy!"
"Hulk… FIGHT BLUE GUY!!!"
"ROARRRRR!!!!"
In the real world, a deafening roar exploded.
Banner's frail body instantly ballooned, and green skin tore through his shirt.
In the blink of an eye, the Green Engine of Wrath had returned!
BAM!
The Hulk charged out like an out-of-control heavy tank, fueled by boundless rage.
He didn't even look up at Frieza (and yes, he made absolutely sure not to look, or he'd turn into a chicken).
His bloodshot eyes were locked squarely on Apocalypse, who was still standing on The Thing.
"Blue Man! GET OFF HIM!!!"
The Hulk leaped high into the air, his massive, boulder-sized green fist slicing through the sound barrier as it slammed down hard onto Apocalypse's astonished face!
"What?!" Apocalypse only had time to raise his hands.
CRACK!
With a massive boom, the force of the punch sent Apocalypse skidding backward dozens of yards, his feet digging two deep trenches into the ground.