Chapter 112: The Uchiha Honor & A Father's Wager
The storm of feminine fury had been muted—quite literally—leaving the Pure Land stream to the more cynical, or simply more experienced, male observers.
[Regular: Hyūga Hizashi]: I expected nothing less.
[Regular: Yūhi Maku]: Hoping for Ren to reform is like waiting for a Hyūga to smile. It defies nature.
[VIP5, Admin: Tobirama Senju]: Sentimentality is a cognitive error. The host's behavioral patterns are consistent and predictable.
[VIP1: Uchiha Izuna]: Exactly. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me seven times… well, that's just these women.
[VIP1: Uchiha Madara (The Philosopher of Carnage)]: Not sentimentality. Stupidity. A failure to recognize a predator's nature.
Back in the grove, Ren and Sakura returned to find Naruto mid-climb. Spotting them, the boy dropped from the trunk with a thump, a wide, proud grin splitting his face.
"Ren! Sakura! Where'd you go? Look! I can almost get to the top!" He rushed over, zeroing in on Sakura. "Hey, Sakura! See? I'm getting really good! Next time you fall in the water, you gotta let me carry you! Ren got to do it, now it's my turn!"
Sakura blinked, her expression cycling from confusion to mild pity. Is he… serious? I mastered this yesterday. And 'carry me'? What is he, five? "That's… great, Naruto," she said, the words flat.
[VIP5, Admin: Tobirama Senju]: The Fourth Hokage's progeny displays a concerning lack of situational awareness. He is fixated on a superficial parity ('a turn to carry') while oblivious to the foundational shift in social dynamics that has occurred.
[VIP1: Minato Namikaze]: He's just being friendly! Building camaraderie!
[VIP1: Uchiha Izuna]: Friendly? He's lining up for seconds at a banquet where the main course is already digested. It's pathetic.
[Regular: Hyūga Hizashi]: Chasing after used goods… a sad fate.
[VIP1: Uchiha Izuna]: 'Chasing' implies motion. He's standing at the empty plate, asking for a taste. Ren isn't the sharing type.
Minato's spectral form seemed to droop.
[VIP1: Uchiha Fugaku]: See? My son may have… accidents… but at least he's not simpering over a girl who just spent two private hours with his rival. Minato's boy is hopeless.
Ren suppressed a laugh. If only Fugaku knew this 'hopeless' boy was supposed to marry his daughter-in-law in another timeline.
[VIP5, Admin: Tobirama Senju]: Analysis: The host's stated objective of 'a home for every girl' presents a systemic threat to the reproductive viability of his male cohort. If successful, it would create a generation of involuntary celibates.
[VIP1: Uchiha Izuna]: So? They can find older women. Plenty of cougars in the ninja world.
[VIP5, Admin: Tobirama Senju]: You oversimplify. Consider Shinku's daughter.
[Regular: Yūhi Maku]: …Do not bring my Kurenai into this hypothetical harem!
The comment, however, struck a nerve with a different parent.
[Regular: Uchiha Mikoto]: Husband… if every girl is taken… what about our Sasuke? He'll be alone forever!
[VIP1: Uchiha Fugaku]: Mikoto, relax. The boy's boasting. If he could actually pull that off, I'd… I'd do something as undignified as Minato's son eating… well, you know.
[VIP1: Minato Namikaze]: WHY IS MY SON THE UNIT OF MEASURE FOR DISGRACE?! USE YOUR OWN SON'S INCIDENT!
[Host: Ren Arakawa]: Gentlemen, please. I have standards. I won't claim 'every' girl. Only the exceptional ones. Your sons' future partners are safe from my predations. I'll even help arrange introductions. I know two lovely ladies: Koharu and Chiyo. Very… experienced. I'll set Naruto and Sasuke up.
[VIP1: Minato Namikaze]: Oh! Thank you, Ren! That's very thoughtful!
[VIP1: Uchiha Fugaku]: MINATO, YOU IDIOT! HE'S OFFERING OUR SONS THE COUNCIL ELDERS! THAT'S LIKE OFFERING DAY-OLD FISH GUTS AS A GOURMET MEAL!
[VIP5, Admin: Tobirama Senju]: …Koharu? Chiyo? Those names are… familiar. Disturbingly so.
[Host: Ren Arakawa]: Don't worry. I'll take good care of my little brothers.
The conversation was cut short by the spectacle in the grove. Driven by rivalry, shame, and raw determination, Naruto and Sasuke had progressed far beyond canon. In the time Ren and Sakura were gone, both boys had clawed their way to within a few feet of the treetop, their chakra flickering fiercely at their feet.
The sight reignited the dormant wager.
[VIP1: Minato Namikaze]: Look! Naruto's about to win! My boy's a natural!
[VIP1: Uchiha Fugaku]: In your dreams! Sasuke will prevail! Your son only got this far because he had a two-hour head start while mine was… indisposed!
[VIP5, Admin: Tobirama Senju]: Minato. You represent the Hokage lineage. If you are forced to call an Uchiha 'Father,' the shame will resonate through the administrative records for eternity. Do not fail.
[VIP1: Minato Namikaze]: I won't! Naruto won't lose to… to someone with that kind of control issue!
[VIP1: Uchiha Fugaku]: Better a control issue than a palate issue!
[VIP1: Uchiha Izuna]: FUGAKU! THE HONOR OF THE UCHIHA IS AT STAKE! YOU CANNOT LOSE TO THIS YELLOW-FLAIRED SIMP! IF YOU HAVE TO CALL HIM 'FATHER,' I WILL PERSONALLY HAUNT YOUR CORNER OF THE PURE LAND!
[VIP1: Uchiha Fugaku]: I WILL PROTECT THE GLORY OF THE UCHIHA! EVEN IN DEATH, EVEN IF OUR CLAN IS GONE, THE NAME WILL NOT BE DRAGGED THROUGH THE MUD BY A DEAD HOKAGE!
The chat became a torrent of competitive fury, a proxy war fought over two traumatized boys clinging to a tree. Sasuke, driven by a desperate need to erase his humiliation, pushed with manic focus. Naruto, fueled by innate stubbornness and the desire to prove himself to a Sakura who only had eyes for Ren, growled with effort.
Ren watched, a small, analytical smile on his face. Their progress was a useful data point. Their rivalry was a exploitable engine. And the Pure Land's investment in their contest was a source of endless entertainment and potential profit.
The chapter closed on the grove, the two boys straining for the top, their living struggle amplified tenfold by the dead fathers betting their posthumous pride on the outcome. The mission against Zabuza was momentarily forgotten, replaced by a more primal, petty, and utterly human conflict: the need to win, and the even greater need for one's father not to lose face in front of his ancestral rival. The "glory of the Uchiha" now hinged precariously on Sasuke's ability to not soil himself while reaching a branch first.
💫 Liked the chapter?You can read 100+ extra chapters on Patreon, including the current
Chapter 212: The Spider's Web and the Trapped Fly
👉 Patreon.com/KudosNey
Your support helps me write more and update faster 💖And don't forget to drop a Power Stone ⭐ — it really motivates me!
Thank you for reading! 🙌✨