Chapter 47: Medical Bills and Misguided Heroics
The sterile hospital room settled into an uneasy quiet after Sakura Haruno's arrival. Naruto Uzumaki hovered near her bed, his usual boisterous energy replaced by genuine concern as he turned to the female doctor finishing her notes.
"Doctor, what's wrong with Sakura?"
The medic-nin—a woman with the tired eyes of someone who'd worked three consecutive shifts—spoke without looking up. "Severe dorsal impact trauma. Multiple rib fractures, dislocated right shoulder, minor organ displacement. Requires three days minimum observation with chakra-assisted healing."
Naruto scratched his head. "No, I mean why is Sakura like this? What happened?"
The doctor finally met his gaze. "Witnesses report she was thrown approximately fifteen feet by another academy student at the hospital entrance. Impact velocity suggests chakra-enhanced strength."
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[VIP Highlight: Minato Namikaze (VIP1) - "Naruto, please be careful what you say..."]
WHAT?!
Naruto's face flushed crimson. "Someone threw Sakura-chan? When I find them, I'll—I'll make them pay! Believe it!"
Cough cough.
Ren cleared his throat softly by the window but remained silent.
Tobirama Senju (VIP5): Fourth, your son's protective instincts are... vigorous, if misguided.
Uchiha Fugaku (VIP1): It seems my son will have prolonged company in his convalescence.
Hyuga Hizashi (VIP1): Team 7 appears to be collapsing before it even forms. This boy Ren is a natural disaster.
Sakumo Hatake (Regular Viewer): I genuinely pity the jōnin instructor. His team is assembling in a hospital ward.
Minato Namikaze: Clears throat nervously. Ren, Naruto doesn't... process things thoroughly. Please don't take his declarations literally.
Kushina Uzumaki (VIP1): He's right, Ren. Naruto truly considers you a friend, even if he doesn't always show it well.
Ren Arakawa (subvocalizing): As long as Naruto doesn't actually try to avenge her on me, we're fine. Empty threats are just background noise.
The doctor finished recording Sakura's vitals and turned to Naruto with professional curiosity. "Are you this patient's friend or relative?"
Naruto immediately puffed up, the question about his crush overriding his anger. "More than friends! We're the closest of close! Practically destined!"
"Excellent." The doctor produced a clipboard with a form. "Then you can accompany me to billing to settle her initial treatment fees. We've had difficulty contacting her family."
She handed Naruto the form. His eyes scanned the numbers at the bottom, and the color drained from his face. The amount listed represented approximately four years of his meager orphan stipend.
"Th-this much?!"
Tobirama Senju: Impressive figures. Konoha's medical services have certainly become... comprehensive in their pricing.
Uchiha Madara (VIP1): What? Can't pay? All bluster and no substance, like father like son.
Uchiha Izuna (Regular Viewer): At least the boy knows when to retreat. Unlike certain simpering fathers who would bankrupt themselves for feminine attention.
Minato Namikaze: I resent that characterization! My devotion to Kushina is—
Kushina Uzumaki: Embarrassing! Stop it!
Naruto's eyes darted around the room, landing on Ren (innocently eating another apple), Sasuke (pretending to sleep), and Sakura (genuinely unconscious). A brilliant—or terrible—idea struck him.
He smiled at the doctor with exaggerated innocence. "Sorry, my hearing's not great today. Could you repeat what you said?"
"I said, please come with me to settle your girlfriend's medical fees. It won't take long."
"Not that part. The thing before."
"The thing before... 'Are you this patient's friend or relative?'"
"No! Don't know her! Never seen her before in my life!" Naruto shoved the clipboard back with such conviction that the doctor blinked.
The medic-nin stared at him for a long moment, then sighed. "I'll attempt to contact her family again, then." She left the ward, her footsteps fading down the hallway.
Naruto peeked through the door crack, sighing in relief when she disappeared. "That was close! Almost had to sell my apartment!"
Tobirama Senju: Resourceful, I'll grant him that. The boy understands tactical retreat.
Minato Namikaze: He gets his quick thinking from his mother! My brilliant, clever, wonderfully cunning Kushina who—
Tobirama Senju: Muted. Thirty seconds.
[Minato Namikaze has been muted by System Administrator Tobirama Senju]
Uchiha Madara: Finally, some peace.
"Naruto, you stay and play nurse. I have places to be." Ren moved toward the door. The sooner he distanced himself from the impending wake-up-and-realize-who-injured-me drama, the better. And those medical bills? Not his problem.
But as he reached for the door handle, a puff of white smoke erupted outside the window.
A figure appeared on the windowsill—silver-haired, one eye covered, the other crinkled in a lazy smile as he read a small orange book. He didn't even look up as he spoke.
"Oh? You think you can just leave after hospitalizing two-thirds of my team before our first meeting?"
Hatake Kakashi. Of course.
Sakumo Hatake: Ah. That's my boy. Always with the dramatic entrances.
Tobirama Senju: The jōnin instructor arrives. This should be interesting.
Before Ren could respond, Naruto—seeking redemption after his bill-dodging display—saw an opportunity for heroics.
"Another white-haired guy!" Naruto shouted, kunai already in hand. "He must be Mizuki's brother or something! Coming for revenge! Don't worry, Jiang Cheng—I'll handle this one! Watch me take him down!"
Naruto charged, kunai raised, a battle cry on his lips.
Kakashi didn't look up from his book. His free hand moved in a blur too fast for Naruto to track.
Thwack.
A single finger tapped Naruto's forehead. The boy froze mid-lunge, then toppled backward, landing on his rear with a comedic thump, utterly bewildered.
Kakashi finally lowered his book, his visible eye curving into that infuriating smile. "Mizuki's brother? Really now." His gaze shifted to Ren. "And you must be Ren Arakawa. The reason my team is having its first meeting in a hospital ward."
Ren met his gaze evenly. "They were fragile. I was... enthusiastic."
"So I see." Kakashi hopped down from the windowsill, landing soundlessly. "The Hokage mentioned you'd be on 'special assignment.' But he didn't mention you'd be assigning my students to hospital beds before introductions."
In the Pure Land, the chat scrolled rapidly.
Uchiha Fugaku: At least the instructor has arrived. Perhaps order can be restored.
Hyuga Hizashi: Order? His team is one conscious member and two bedridden patients. What order?
Kushina Uzumaki: Naruto tried so hard though! He wanted to protect his friend!
Minato Namikaze (no longer muted): Our brave boy! Taking on a jōnin for his comrade! Even if his assessment skills need work...
Tobirama Senju: The boy mistook the Copy Ninja for a revenge-seeking sibling. His observational skills are... concerning.
Kakashi glanced at Sasuke (still pretending sleep, but now with slightly tensed shoulders) and Sakura (breathing evenly under sedation). "Well. Since Team 7's inaugural mission appears to be 'recuperation,' I suppose we should begin with proper introductions. Naruto, since you're conscious—care to try again without the kunai this time?"
Naruto scrambled to his feet, rubbing his forehead where Kakashi had tapped him. "You're... our sensei?"
"Hatake Kakashi. Your jōnin instructor. Pleased to meet you." He glanced at Ren. "You're dismissed, Arakawa. Unless you'd like to stay and explain to Sakura when she wakes why she has three broken ribs."
Ren offered a slight, respectful nod. "Another time, perhaps." He moved toward the door once more.
This time, Kakashi didn't stop him. But as Ren stepped into the hallway, the jōnin's voice followed, casual yet carrying weight.
"Tell the Hokage Team 7 will be delayed. And Ren?" A pause. "Try to avoid maiming any other future comrades of mine. The hospital's billing department is apparently overwhelmed."
Ren didn't look back, just raised a hand in acknowledgment as he walked away. Behind him, he heard Naruto's voice, already recovering its enthusiasm.
"So, Kakashi-sensei! What's our first mission? Once Sakura-chan and Sasuke are better, I mean!"
"First," Kakashi said, his voice drifting down the hall, "we learn each other's names. Then perhaps how to identify a jōnin versus a revenge-seeking sibling. Small steps."
Ren smiled faintly as he walked toward the hospital exit. The live stream in his mind was a mix of commentary, critique, and Minato's renewed attempts to compliment his wife through increasingly elaborate metaphors.
Ren Arakawa (subvocalizing): Team 7: assembled, sort of. Kakashi: unimpressed but amused. Medical bills: unpaid. And I have an Anbu internship to navigate. Progress.
Outside, the Konoha afternoon was bright and clear. Somewhere in the Pure Land, Tobirama Senju watched Ren depart the hospital, his analytical mind already calculating probabilities, outcomes, and the unsettling truth that this boy—connected to the dead, trailed by chaos, and now operating outside standard hierarchies—might just be the variable that reshaped everything.
The Second Hokage allowed himself a rare, genuine thought: Perhaps my brother's village needs a little shaking up.
The stream continued scrolling as Ren disappeared into the bustling village streets, the dead still arguing, the living still healing, and the threads of fate tangling in new, unpredictable patterns.