Villa.
"Sumeru's national anthem?"
Seeing the eye-catching comments flooding the livestream, Luo Chen looked a little surprised.
The reason he had played "I Never Forgot" was simply because he felt the song perfectly suited the atmosphere surrounding the Dendro Archons and the Aranara.
He hoped that, just as the song expressed, the people of Sumeru—and all of Teyvat—would never forget those great gods and their faithful companions.
He never expected it to become Sumeru's national anthem!
That really was beyond his expectations~
But after thinking it over...
It also seemed perfectly reasonable!
"That works too~"
"Once it becomes Sumeru's national anthem, it'll bring me quite a bit of Emotion Value too~"
Luo Chen nodded slightly, a satisfied smile appearing on his face.
Looks like he had unintentionally created another massive Emotion Value generator!
If the feedback proved good enough, perhaps he could arrange something similar for the other nations as well.
For example—
Mondstadt — Let the Wind Tell You
Liyue — Liyue of Azure Skies
Both songs were just as beloved as I Never Forgot!
"What?"
"You're saying one of the singers in Let the Wind Tell You is from Liyue?"
"No problem~"
"Mondstadt is the Nation of Freedom~"
"Even its own citizens occasionally mispronounce Barbatos's name, so what's wrong with letting a foreigner sing Mondstadt's national anthem?"
"Absolutely nothing!"
"As for Inazuma and Fontaine..."
"That's a bit difficult~"
"There doesn't seem to be any song on the same level as those three that could serve as a national anthem..."
"I'll just have to think about it later."
With that thought, Luo Chen gathered himself again.
After giving two light coughs, he returned to business.
"Ahem. Looks like everyone really loves 'I Never Forgot.'"
"That's a good thing!"
"The most terrifying thing in this world..."
"...is being forgotten!"
"I hope the people of Sumeru will take this as a lesson!"
"Alright!"
"That concludes today's serious review!"
"Next..."
"It's time for our once-a-day Not-So-Serious Review!"
...
Hearing this, everyone in the chat group finally breathed a sigh of relief.
Ever since the livestream reviews had begun, today's serious segment had undoubtedly been the most emotionally draining.
Throughout the entire review, everyone had been filled with both anger and sorrow.
Especially after witnessing Greater Lord Rukkhadevata being completely forgotten.
It was simply too heartbreaking.
Fortunately...
It was finally over.
Now they could use the Not-So-Serious Review to lift everyone's spirits.
Otherwise, if it continued like this...
They really wouldn't be able to take it anymore.
[Extraordinary Chat Group]
[Lumine]: Yay! Yay! The Not-So-Serious Review we've all been waiting for is finally here~
[Paimon]: Yay! Yay~
[Alice]: As everyone knows, the Not-So-Serious Review is extremely not serious! Every Archon before this—except Venti—has had their image completely shattered~
[Alice]: Not a single featured character has ever walked away smiling!
[Alice]: I wonder if Little Dendro Archon is ready this time? (Smirk.jpg)
[Venti]: Hm??? What do you mean "except me?"
[Dvalin]: Do you even need to ask? Who in all of Teyvat doesn't know that Barbatos spends all day doing anything but his job?
[Dvalin]: It's a Not-So-Serious Review for everyone else, but for you it's nothing but a Serious Review! (Doge.jpg)
[Zhongli]: By universal reasoning, Dvalin is correct. (Serious.jpg)
[Makoto]: Morax is right! (Doge.jpg)
[Ei]: Sister is right! (Doge.jpg)
[Nahida]: My seniors are right as well! (Doge.jpg)
[Furina]: Nahida is right! (Doge.jpg)
[Venti]: ...
[Venti]: Ahem! Today is Little Dendro Archon's special day! Let's talk about Nahida instead~ Ehehe~
[Barbara]: Lord Barbatos has a point!
[Barbara]: Even though Little Dendro Archon is young, since she's the Grass God, she's surely extremely grass-worthy! (Doge.jpg)
[Keqing]: Rex Lapis may be unmatched in strength as the God of War, but when it comes to being unintentionally hilarious, Little Dendro Archon is probably even better! (Doge.jpg)
[Yae Miko]: That's true~ Though if we're only talking about cooking, Ei still wins. (Giggle.jpg)
[Ei]: ...
[Clorinde]: Ahem, the people of Mondstadt, Liyue, and Inazuma are absolutely right!
[Clorinde]: Even though Lady Furina can be... well... a little quirky sometimes, she's definitely still no match for Little Dendro Archon!
Seeing this, Nahida was completely speechless.
She was the Dendro Archon.
Not the "Meme Archon!"
She really didn't want to surpass all the senior Archons in that department...
Seeing their god being "slandered," the people of Sumeru immediately came to her defense!
[Collei]: Lady Lesser Lord Kusanali's "grass" refers to plants! Definitely not that other "grass"!
[Nilou]: That's right! Besides, Lesser Lord Kusanali is so adorable. The livestream will definitely go easy on her!
[Faruzan]: The current record for the most Not-So-Serious segments belongs to Rex Lapis with seven! Just wait and see—Little Dendro Archon definitely won't break that record!
[Hu Tao]: Really? This Director doesn't believe it! (Smirk.jpg)
[Lumine]: It's okay! Even if you end up with more than seven, I'll still be your reliable First Sage! (Pats chest.jpg)
[Alice]: The most mischievous Traveler and the most meme-worthy Archon! Oh, and don't forget the hungriest stomach! What a perfect match! (Doge.jpg)
[Nahida]: ...
[Lumine]: ...
[Paimon]: ...
You just wait...
When it's your turn to be reviewed, we'll see how smug you are!
After joking around for a while, the atmosphere inside the chat group finally became lively again.
Everyone was looking forward to Nahida's upcoming Not-So-Serious Review even more.
After all...
This was the true source of happiness!
Thinking of that, everyone quickly turned their attention back to the livestream.
...
Villa.
As if sensing everyone's anticipation, Luo Chen smiled.
Without keeping them waiting any longer, he spoke directly.
"First item of today's Not-So-Serious Review—Nahida's Curious Analogies!"
"In truth, Nahida and Neuvillette are actually quite similar in certain respects."
"Namely..."
"They both have difficulty understanding humans."
"The difference is that one is the Hydro Dragon Sovereign."
"While the other had only recently been born."
"Faced with this situation, the two of them chose different paths."
"Because of his position, Neuvillette chose to keep his distance from humanity."
"Meanwhile, Nahida chose to observe humans."
"But..."
"She isn't particularly good at imitation."
"So..."
"She began using analogies."
"Because she believes analogies are wonderful tools that allow people to understand unknown concepts through things they already know."
"To be fair..."
"She's not wrong."
"Unfortunately, although Nahida understands countless profound truths, she's rather lacking in common sense."
"Hmm..."
"In that regard, she's somewhat similar to Shenhe from Liyue."
"And because of that..."
"She often comes up with some extremely unusual analogies."
"As for just how unusual they are..."
"Take a look at the following video."
As he spoke, Luo Chen clicked his mouse and started the video.
...
Soon, the livestream screen changed.
Scene One: Nahida Reviews Seafood
Seeing Lumine arrive, Nahida smiled happily.
"You've brought me a new story?"
"I'll trade it for some Candied Ajilenakh Nuts that I made myself."
Lumine gave one of her signature mischievous smiles before presenting the dish she had cooked.
[Fragrant Doodoo Seafood Soup]
After taking a bite, Nahida's expression gradually became rather strange.
She rested her chin on her hand and pondered for quite a while before finally sighing.
"How should I put this..."
"To use an analogy..."
"You wouldn't give vegetable juice to a puppy, would you?"
...
Scene Two: Nahida Reviews Faruzan
"Faruzan?"
"Her body was affected by the lingering power inside King Deshret's ruins."
"It's like being accidentally thrown off the back of Time—a giant tortoise..."
"...and forever left behind."
...
Scene Three: Nahida Reviews the Sea of Ash
"The Sea of Ash..."
"There's absolutely nothing there."
"It's as empty..."
"...as the brain of a Fungi-Boar."
"I know that, of course."
...
Scene Four: Nahida Wants the Traveler to Introduce Her to the Other Archons
"I've heard that playing games is one of the fastest ways to shorten the distance between people."
"I imagine the same should apply to gods."
"Perhaps..."
"After we all meet, I could suggest playing hopscotch together..."
"Hmm..."
"That doesn't sound quite right."
"It almost feels like I'd be turning my house into one full of differently sized holes..."
"...and taking advantage of my own height to bully everyone."
...
Scene Five: Nahida Reviews Dunyarzad
Looking at the unconscious Dunyarzad lying on the bed, Nahida sighed softly.
"In her current condition..."
"She's like a little bird whose feathers have almost all been plucked away while it's still soaring high in the sky."
"And all I can do..."
"...is stir up a gust of wind to delay her fall a little longer."
...
Scene Six: Nahida Reviews Dehya
After noticing Dehya had sensed Dunyarzad's presence, Nahida looked rather surprised.
"Such remarkable perception?"
"Could it be..."
"...that she has invisible antennae?"
...
Scene Seven: Nahida Reviews the Traveler During the Sabzeruz Festival Samsara
"A laboratory mouse trying to understand why it's being experimented on..."
"...is naturally an extremely difficult thing."
"To put it more simply..."
"It's like catching a Pyro Crystalfly and using it as a firefly for illumination."
"Focusing too much on the experience..."
"...while overlooking its true nature."
...
Scene Eight: Nahida Reviews Herself
"After all..."
"I'm merely the moon..."
"And the true sun..."
"...is no longer here."
"It's like..."
"If you can't even become a proper caterpillar..."
"...how could you ever become a butterfly?"
"Last night was truly wonderful."
"Even now..."
"I still feel like a candle floating gently on the surface of the water..."
"...drifting within happiness and joy."
...
Scene Nine: Nahida Reviews the Atmosphere During Part of Her Story Quest
"The current atmosphere..."
"is like water confined inside a container."
"It has become more orderly..."
"But it has forever lost the freedom of flowing through rivers."
...
Scene Ten: Miscellaneous
"It's like after a disastrous rainstorm..."
"...the puddles left upon the ground can sometimes pretend to be the sky."
...
The video wasn't very long.
Yet it contained one strange analogy after another.
Once it ended, everyone wore rather peculiar expressions.
Just as Luo Chen had said...
Nahida's analogies really were wonderfully strange.
...
Fontaine — Palais Mermonia.
"Hahaha! So this is how Nahida understands the world?"
"Hahaha! This is too funny~!"
After watching the video, Furina sat on the sofa laughing so hard she could barely breathe.
Those analogies were simply hilarious~
An ordinary person would never come up with something like that!
Not only were they difficult to think of—
They were difficult to say with a straight face!
Yet Nahida managed to come up with them effortlessly while wearing the most serious expression imaginable.
Just recalling those scenes made Furina want to laugh all over again.
Beside her, Neuvillette rested his chin in his hand, seemingly deep in thought.
Suddenly, he turned toward Furina with genuine curiosity.
"Lady Furina."
"What do you think about me learning Little Dendro Archon's way of speaking?"
"Huh?"
Furina froze.
Then she stared at Neuvillette in disbelief.
"...What?"
"You want to learn Nahida's bizarre analogies?"
"Mm."
Neuvillette nodded.
"I think Little Dendro Archon's approach makes perfect sense."
"Analogies can indeed help people understand unfamiliar concepts more quickly."
"Perhaps through them..."
"...I'll be able to understand human emotions much faster."
Previously, in order to better integrate into human society, he had sought advice from others in the chat group on how to converse.
For example...
Cloud Retainer from Liyue.
And Cyno from Sumeru.
However...
Their methods seemed rather... questionable.
By comparison, Little Dendro Archon's approach had caught his attention.
Since it came from the God of Wisdom herself...
Perhaps it would actually work.
"Uh..."
After confirming he was serious, Furina twitched at the corner of her mouth.
Those bizarre analogies weren't something just anyone could use!
When Nahida said them...
They sounded a little strange.
But mostly...
They were simply adorable.
If Neuvillette were the one saying them...
She imagined him speaking those strange metaphors with an utterly serious expression.
A chill instantly ran down her spine.
That would be unbearably awkward~
Then she remembered how he had previously learned conversation skills from Cloud Retainer...
Cold jokes from Cyno...
And his own uncanny talent for making every conversation awkward.
If all of those were combined...
"Pfft—"
Unable to hold it in any longer, Furina burst out laughing.
"Hahahaha~"
She laughed so hard that she collapsed onto the sofa.
Neuvillette: "..."
So...
Is there something wrong with me...
Or is there something wrong with Lady Furina?
I haven't even made a single analogy yet.
Why is she already laughing?
At least give me your opinion...
Neuvillette suddenly felt rather exhausted.
...
Liyue — Granny Ping's Home.
"Hehe, those analogies are really interesting~"
"As expected of the God of Wisdom."
"She's truly worthy of that title~"
After watching the video, Guizhong covered her lips as she giggled.
Her eyes curved into beautiful crescents.
Cloud Retainer and Granny Ping also found it quite amusing.
However, unlike the lively Guizhong—and considering Nahida was, after all, an Archon—they merely smiled gently.
At that moment, Cloud Retainer suddenly thought of something and turned toward Shenhe, who was standing nearby.
"Shenhe."
"The livestream also mentioned that you lack common sense."
"How about learning from Little Dendro Archon in the future?"
"Although her analogies are certainly unusual..."
"They may occasionally help you better understand humans."
Now that Guizhong had returned to life, she had gradually begun living in Liyue Harbor.
Naturally, Shenhe had followed her into human society.
With Cloud Retainer and the other adepti watching over her, Shenhe's condition remained stable.
This was also the perfect opportunity for her to interact with ordinary people.
After all...
Her disciple was human.
Sooner or later, she would have to integrate into human society.
Considering she had barely interacted with people before, Cloud Retainer thought perhaps Little Dendro Archon's method might actually prove effective.
"Analogies?"
"Master..."
"Those seem... rather difficult..."
For once, Shenhe looked genuinely confused.
She couldn't understand a single one of the analogies shown in the livestream.
They felt like heavenly scriptures to her.
She had absolutely no idea how Little Dendro Archon had managed to think of them.
In the end...
She could only conclude that Nahida truly deserved the title of God of Wisdom.
Seeing Shenhe's expression, Guizhong smiled teasingly at Cloud Retainer.
"Cloud Retainer."
"You really said that with a straight face."
"Does Shenhe honestly seem like the type who could come up with analogies like those?"
"You're making things far too difficult for your poor little disciple."
Cloud Retainer sighed helplessly.
"I simply hoped she could better understand human society."
At that moment, Granny Ping, seated across from them, smiled softly.
"If you want Shenhe to understand humans..."
"The best way is still to let her spend more time among them."
"Through work."
"And everyday life."
"Simply staying with us won't be enough."
"I've heard Xiangling from Wanmin Restaurant has gone to Inazuma."
"They're probably short-handed over there."
"Why not have Shenhe go lend them a hand?"
Cloud Retainer thought it over and found the suggestion quite reasonable.
She nodded before giving Shenhe a few instructions.
Shenhe naturally had no objections.
Watching Shenhe obediently nod over and over again, Guizhong suddenly grinned.
"Hehe."
"Shenhe..."
"You're definitely going to run into trouble out there."
"Let me teach you the proper way to deal with it!"
To read advanced Chapters, head over to p@treon:
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