Chapter 80: I Am Hitori Gotoh, a Social Disaster
A giant hand reached out from the void, and cards radiating an infinite glow flew from its palm, lining up neatly before Haruka's eyes.
Three cards detached themselves from the deck, shrinking as they floated toward him. Two glowed with a faint, milky-white light, while the one in the center shimmered with a serene blue—the color of human logic and reason.
[Swimmer's Gift (White)]
You have a modest talent for swimming. If you push yourself to the limit, you might even make it to a regional meet.
[Beast Instinct (White)]
A primal, animalistic intuition. It often helps you dodge disaster, but it's a double-edged sword—after all, a human's greatest asset is their intellect.
[Slippery Mindset (Blue)]
You possess a slick, adaptable mind. You can navigate social interactions with different types of people with ease. Although you might struggle to stick to your guns sometimes, who's to say that's a bad thing?
The three cards drifted silently in front of Haruka.
'Three choices. I don't need much time to think—the blue card is obviously the best.'
Haruka tapped on [Slippery Mindset].
Snap!
The blue card shattered, dissolving into sparks of light that surged into Haruka's body.
***
I am Hitori Gotoh.
A miserable... socially anxious, gloomy clown.
Ever since I was little, I've been terrible at talking to people because I overthink everything.
'If I do this, will they think I'm weird? Is this too forward? Are we even friends yet? Is this a total social blunder...?'
Reason after reason. Excuse after excuse.
By the time I'd finally worked up the courage to react, the kids who invited me had already gone off to play with someone else.
Once you miss that initial window, trying to break back into the group feels like trying to climb a vertical wall. My head is constantly filled with obstacles and imaginary hurdles.
I was too embarrassed, too shy. I desperately wanted people to talk to me first. I'd even come up with five different ways to respond if someone did approach me... but I could never make the first move myself.
I spent an entire year without making a single friend.
Even the teacher was shocked. She probably wondered how a child could be this painfully timid.
At my parents' request, the teacher decided to intervene. She sat me next to the most energetic kid in class and introduced me to everyone, trying to get them to play with me.
But...
The energetic kid gave up after just a few sentences. I was too busy huddled in my corner, staring at everyone with a haunted look. Her mom had told her to be friends with "sunny" people, after all.
When I was introduced to the other kids, no one said anything. They didn't even remember me. Someone even thought I was a stranger from another class.
The teacher tried to get me to be proactive.
But every time I stood in front of them, I'd start obsessing over what to say to make everyone happy. I didn't want to ignore anyone or hurt anyone's feelings. But the more I thought about it, the more my "cool" practiced lines vanished into thin air.
In their eyes, I was just a weirdo the teacher had dragged over—someone who stood there stiff as a board, staring them down with gloomy eyes without saying a word.
'Sob sob... they all ran away crying... sob sob...'
Eventually, even the teacher gave up.
Time passed in a blur of internal conflict, and I graduated from elementary school.
I didn't have a single friend. Not one!!!
Kami-sama help me, why is it so hard? I just want to talk to people! I want someone to talk to every day! Argh!
But then.
When I started middle school, I saw a famous band on TV. The lead guitarist looked so dazzling, and something he said struck a chord deep inside me.
"In a band, everyone gets to let their own light shine."
'That's it! I'm going to let my light shine! I'll become a legendary guitarist! I'll be the center of attention!'
I decided right then and there. At the Cultural Festival, I would be a star!
With that hope in my heart, I borrowed a guitar from my dad—a retired guitarist—and began my secret training.
And then...
The Cultural Festival came and went.
Second year passed.
Third year passed.
All of middle school went by.
'Hehe... hehehe... guitar, friends... hehe... none of it worked. No big success. Now I've officially become a gloomy, pathetic clown. Heh...'
Gotoh: ( ꩜ ᯅ ꩜;)
But even a pathetic clown like me has her own little sanctuary!
"Guitar Hero!"
It's my MeTube account. My dad set it up for me. I post covers on there for people to listen to. Before I knew it, I had thirty thousand followers! My guitar practice wasn't for nothing! Sob sob!
(╥﹏╥)
Then, the biggest event of my life finally happened!
My school merged, the government provided funding, and we moved to the most bustling city in the world—Tokyo!
My new school is Sobu High. They say it's the best "commoner" school around. If it weren't for the merger, I probably wouldn't have had a chance to get in, given my average grades.
New school, new me! I tried to show off my talent to everyone. I carried my guitar everywhere, and I covered my desk in music CDs.
'I'm so cunning. With all this, someone is bound to notice and come talk to me, right?'
'Stardom and glory are just around the corner! Just you wait!'
But.
But.
A day went by. Nothing.
A week went by. Nothing.
A month went by. Still nothing.
Everyone ignored me as naturally as they did in middle school.
Ah.
I should have been used to it. Maybe I needed a different approach?
Until one day.
A transfer student arrived.
She was deaf, but her luck seemed pretty good. She ended up sitting right next to the boy in front of me, and he started taking care of her immediately.
'I'm so jealous.'
'That boy is so nice. He's so patient with her. If I tried to talk to him and become his friend, would he be patient with me too?'
'But what if he isn't? It would be so awkward...'
The overthinking started all over again...
Until a few days later.
With the support of Hiratsuka-sensei, I gathered my courage and went to a certain clubroom. That's where I met them.
And I met someone who is probably, definitely my nemesis—Yukino Yukinoshita!
The legendary "Ice Queen." A brilliant genius!
I don't know much about her, but she's definitely terrifying!
With their help, a plan called the "Alliance of Outcasts" was formed.
My life was finally about to change.
***
[Because of your actions, the exam schedule has been moved up to next Thursday.]
[Club activity time has been canceled for everyone, shifting the focus entirely to studying.]
[You go with the flow and study along with them.]
[You only need to wait until the exams are over next week to gain the legal right to skip class. But the knowledge you already possess feels incredibly dull. You even feel like the teachers' levels are inferior to yours. It's boring.]
[In this state of boredom, aside from normal class time, you spend most of your time in the Service Club, helping Shoko Nishimiya and Hitori Gotoh with their studies.]
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Hand over all of your Power Stones!!
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