I still remember when the twins arrived at the mansion and completely shifted the dynamic of the place. When I first met Rudeus, all I saw was a clumsy, careless boy who had zero respect for me. When I hit him, he hit me back, so I ended up beating him into the ground.
After that, I realized his brother hadn't reacted to what I did. Back then, I thought he was just a cold bastard. He dodged every single one of my attacks without so much as flinching, and then he spun me around like I was his doll.
Yes, I was fascinated from that day on... though I have to admit I was also a little scared. That calmness of his was unsettling.
I actually started thinking he was defective or something. What kind of child doesn't scream? What kind of kid doesn't cry or get angry when you curse at them? It wasn't normal. It was as if he were empty inside, or filled with something I couldn't understand.
Ever since the kidnapping incident, he had offered to look after me. The maids told me something that made me doubt my thinking about him being broken. They said that the night we were brought back, he went to my room. He didn't go in. He just stood by the door, listening to my breathing, making sure I was okay, that I was safe, before finally going to sleep.
A month later, I found him atop the walls, gazing up at the sky.
"What are you doing up there!? Get down, you shrimp!" I yelled from below, arms crossed.
He turned. For a split second, I saw surprise in his eyes, as if I'd woken him from a dream.
"I'm just watching the stars," he replied.
"The stars? They're just bright dots! Get down before you fall and Grandfather blames me!"
He didn't move.
"Don't you feel like you belong with them, Young Eris?" he asked suddenly.
I fell silent, confused.
"Belong...? What are you talking about? I belong to House Boreas."
"Think about it. We were all dust once, and in the end, we return to the sky. Like a transformation... or an escape to the beyond. No pain, no regrets."
I just stared at him.
"We might feel big, Young Eris. We might believe we're powerful down here, shouting and throwing punches. But the truth is, we are nothing compared to the vast universe."
He was always like this, saying weird things, speaking a language only he understood. At the time, I didn't pay it any mind. I thought he was just trying to sound interesting or trying to confuse me.
"Hmph!" I kicked the dirt. "Ghislaine says to go rest. She told me to tell you."
He finally looked down at me.
"Alright. If Ghislaine says so."
He hopped off the wall, landing silently beside me.
"Thanks for coming to get me, Eris."
"I didn't come to get you! I'm just passing on a message!" I snapped, turning away so he wouldn't see my cheeks burning.
...
Daiki was always an enigma to me.
For months, I watched him. I saw him train until his hands bled. I saw him endure Ghislaine's scoldings without blinking and correct Rudeus without ever raising his voice.
To me, he was like the ice that forms on the lakes in winter.
But it took me a year... a whole year before my tenth birthday to realize how wrong I was.
It was in the little details.
The way he covered for Rudeus when he did something stupid, taking the blame without a word.
How he sneaked the best parts of the meal to Ghislaine when he thought no one was looking.
Or how, whenever I got frustrated and wanted to smash everything because I didn't understand a lesson, he would just sit beside me. He wouldn't say "you're stupid" or "it's easy." He would simply wait until I was ready to try again.
And then it clicked.
Deep down, I realized the truth: Daiki wasn't cold because he felt nothing. He was cold because he was holding too much inside.
On the outside, he seemed unshakeable, sure. Like a statue that reacts to neither wind nor rain. But inside... inside, there was an enormous heat. A fire he only let show in flashes, when he thought no one was watching.
From that moment on, I stopped trying to shatter his calm with my fists...
I also stopped because it was impossible to hit him.
Seriously, I tried everything: ambushes, surprise attacks, low kicks, throwing things... nothing worked. He always moved before my fist could land, or parried me so smoothly that I ended up face-first in the dirt or hugging a pillar.
"Idiot..." I whispered that night, staring at my ceiling. "Someday I'll be fast enough to land that punch. And on that day, you'll have to take me seriously."
...
Then, his tenth birthday approached, and that was when I finally realized it...
I had fallen in love with him.
And the worst part was, it hadn't happened just then. It wasn't yesterday. It had happened way before. Exactly two years ago, during my own tenth birthday party.
After that dance, I stayed in my room, unable to sleep.
I tossed and turned, getting tangled in the sheets, but every time I closed my eyes, the image returned: the two of us, suspended in the air... and him.
Especially him.
The boy who almost never smiled. The one incapable of making silly jokes like Rudeus. The boy who always seemed to be calculating his next move had smiled at me with a warmth I'd never seen.
A smile like no other.
I pressed a hand to my chest.
"Why...?" I murmured into the darkness. "Why did you smile at me like that?"
I always thought Daiki was unreachable, someone living in his own world of thought and strength. But that night, as he held me, he didn't feel distant. He felt... present. He felt mine.
And that smile... that damn smile was proof that I meant something to him, too. That I wasn't just a job, or some loud nuisance he had to defeat.
"Idiot... Huge idiot. Now I'll never be able to forget it."
And... with only a few days left until his birthday, I was still racking my brain trying to figure out what the hell to get him.
What do you give someone like him?
He didn't care about expensive toys. He only wore fancy clothes because he had to.
Then I remembered the dance. I remembered how he held me. I remembered that he saw me as a partner.
"I don't want to give him a thing. I want to give him... results."
I wanted to prove that my balance was perfect. That I could move on any terrain, even the most dangerous ones, without him having to hold me up. I wanted him to look at me and think: "She doesn't need help."
It had rained that afternoon.
For any normal person, climbing up there would be madness.
But I am Eris Boreas Greyrat.
Fear is for the weak.
I sneaked out the third-floor window and scrambled up to the main roof.
"Right," I muttered, standing on the tiles. "Low center of gravity. Firm steps..."
Using the words he'd taught me, I moved forward.
One step.
Two steps.
"Ha! This is easy!" I exclaimed, feeling excited and confident.
Then, I decided to try a practice lunge right there, on the slippery edge.
Big mistake.
I stepped on a loose tile as I pivoted to push off.
"Huh?"
There was no time to scream.
My feet flew out from under me.
I started sliding.
I squeezed my eyes shut, bracing for the impact, for the pain. It wouldn't kill me, but the pain and the humiliation would sting just the same.
But the end never came.
Instead, I felt a brutal yank on my wrist, followed by a strong arm wrapping around my waist.
"I've got you!" he grunted, and with one motion, he hauled me up, dragging me away from the edge to a safer, flatter section of the roof.
He didn't let go once we were safe.
He pulled me tight against him.
I could hear his heart. It was racing a mile a minute. "Thump-thump-thump-thump." Just like mine.
"Are you stupid? Are you out of your mind, Young Eris?"
I pulled back a little to look at him.
I wanted to yell at him not to insult me, I wanted to tell him I had it under control, but when I saw his face, the words died in my throat.
He wasn't angry about my clumsiness.
He was terrified.
He was terrified of losing me.
"I... I wanted to train," I stammered, feeling small for the first time in a long time. "I wanted to improve my balance... to surprise y... It wouldn't have hurt that bad..."
Daiki closed his eyes and let out a shaky sigh, resting his forehead against my shoulder.
"You almost scared me to death... Forget about whether I lost you or not—what if this had been a real fight?"
I froze, my hands hanging in the air.
"I'm sorry..."
"Don't do that again. If you want to train balance, we'll do it together. With me right there. Understood?"
"Yes. Understood."
"Good. Now let's get down."
I didn't need to be perfect for him.
I just needed to be alive.
And he would always be there to make sure of that.
Daiki stood in front of me, arms crossed.
"Young Eris."
"I told you to stop calling me that." I looked down at the rug. "Just call me Eris."
"I'll call you Eris when you beat me. And today... today a wet roof almost beat you."
I felt the shame burn my ears.
I wanted to scream, but I knew he was right.
"Do you know what your mistake was?"
"I slipped. The tiles were wet," I shot back defensively.
"No. Your mistake wasn't slipping. Your mistake was using too much force on a surface that couldn't handle it."
"You're a cannon," he said. For a second I thought it was a compliment, until he kept talking. "You have power. You have fire. But if you fire a cannon from a paper boat, you sink. You have to adapt your strength to the terrain. On a solid ballroom floor, you can stomp all you want. On a wet roof, you have to be a feather. You can't attack the world with the same intensity every time, because sometimes the world is fragile, and you'll break right along with it."
He patted my head, like I was a dog.
"Train that. Control. Adaptability. When you understand that... then you'll stop being a cannon that sinks itself."
"And Eris..." He said my name without the "Young," and something hit me in the chest, like I wasn't ready for it. "Thanks for wanting to surprise me. But I'd rather you be alive than impressive."
He walked out and closed the door.
"Fine, Daiki. I get it. I'm going to learn to be light. I'm going to learn not to sink. And the day I do..."