By the time morning sunlight filtered through the enchanted windows of Hogwarts, Roy had already returned from the Chamber of Secrets, cleaned up, and changed into his uniform.
But as he walked to breakfast, he could still feel the weight of last night's discovery lingering in his mind.
Ancient soul magic.A hidden mastermind.Salazar Slytherin's lingering influence.
None of that, however, prepared him for the sight that awaited him in the Entrance Hall.
The Pink Menace Arrives
Dolores Umbridge stood in the center of the hall wearing her usual blinding, fluffy pink attire — but now she held a parchment longer than her entire body.
Behind her, Filch proudly hammered a giant golden-framed notice onto the wall.
EDUCATIONAL DECREE NUMBER ONE
"All student organizations, teams, groups, and gatherings must be approved by the High Inquisitor."
Students groaned around the hall.Some muttered insults.Others just looked exhausted.
Roy walked past, sipping his morning tea, completely unfazed.
Umbridge spotted him.
Her face twitched.
"Mr. Valvas."
She spoke like she was digesting a lemon."I expect your… extravagant club activities to cease until I approve them."
Roy blinked.
"What club?"
She narrowed her eyes."Your Hufflepuff gatherings. Your meetings. Your… influence."
Roy shrugged, deadpan:
**"Oh, those aren't clubs.
They're family meetings."**
Multiple students snorted.A Gryffindor choked on his pumpkin juice.A Ravenclaw nearly fell over laughing.
Umbridge turned crimson.
But before she could reply, Roy walked off:
"Have a good day, Professor Toadge."
The hall erupted.
Her eye twitched—
Filch dragged her away before she exploded.
Breakfast with Chaos
Roy sat with the Hufflepuffs, who were buzzing with excitement.
"Roy! Roy! Did you see the decree?!"
Ernie whispered dramatically.
"We're not stopping anything, right?" "If she bans our meetings, we'll just call them study sessions!"
Hannah declared proudly.
"If she bans study sessions, we'll call them friendship circles!"
Justin added.
"If she bans friendship—"
"—Then we stop pretending," Roy said dryly."And we make her life difficult."
Thirty Hufflepuffs nodded like soldiers receiving orders.
First Class — Defense Against the Dark Arts
Roy and the Hufflepuffs filed in early, and the moment they sat, they noticed something strange:
**No wands allowed on desks.
No spells allowed.Only books.**
Umbridge entered with a pink clipboard and the world's most irritating smile.
"Good morning, children."
No one answered.
Roy sipped tea he conjured, staring at her with the deadest expression.
"Today," Umbridge said sweetly,
"we will learn the theory of defensive magic.Spells are unnecessary."
Roy raised his hand.
The class froze.
Umbridge's smile tightened dangerously.
"Yes… Mr. Valvas?"
Roy spoke calmly:
**"What will the students do during an actual battle?
Throw the textbook at the enemy?"**
A wave of muffled laughter spread.
Umbridge's eye twitched.
"Detention."
Roy:
"Appeal."
She blinked."What?"
**"You can't give detentions for asking questions.
Ministry Rule 337-B."**
Hufflepuffs gasped.This man just out-ministered her.
Umbridge sputtered like a broken kettle.
Hufflepuffs Strike Back
As Umbridge forced the class to read chapter one in silence, the Hufflepuffs began their counterattack.
Completely silent…Completely innocent…Completely devastating.
Prank #1 — The Quill Shuffle
Every time Umbridge looked away, Hufflepuffs swapped her quill with another one.She wrote pink ink → looked away → wrote green ink → looked away → wrote sparkles → looked away → wrote bubbles.
Eventually she screamed:
"WHO IS DOING THIS?!"
The entire class pointed at Filch's cat, Mrs. Norris.
Even the cat looked offended.
Prank #2 — The Toad Chorus
Whenever Umbridge said the word "children," the Hufflepuffs croaked softly:
"Ribbit."
She glared at them.
Said "children" again.
"Ribbit."
Again.
"Ribbit—ribbit."
Roy didn't even participate.He just watched, drinking tea like a proud father whose kids got 100% in mischief.
Prank #3 — The Roy Effect
When Umbridge tried lecturing about "proper behavior in the classroom," a group of first-year Hufflepuffs raised their hands:
"Professor, Roy taught us this better.""Professor, Roy said the opposite.""Professor, Roy can block the Killing Curse."
Umbridge's face turned purple.
Roy, sipping quietly:
"I never said that."
"But you can, right?"Ernie whispered loudly.
Umbridge's face nearly exploded.
Class Ends in Defeat
By the time the bell rang, Umbridge was trembling with suppressed rage, her hair frizzed, her quill snapping in half as she packed up.
Meanwhile the Hufflepuffs walked out proudly, high-fiving each other.
Roy followed with his hands in his pockets, calm and unbothered.
After Class — Professor Sprout's Reaction
When they returned to the Hufflepuff corridor, Professor Sprout was waiting, looking slightly confused.
"I've received a complaint from Professor Umbridge…"
The students stiffened.
Sprout continued:
"…that you all behaved inappropriately during her class."
They stared at the floor.
Then Sprout lowered her voice:
**"…Next time, do it smarter.
And don't let her catch you."**
The Hufflepuffs erupted in joy.
Roy smiled.
Sprout nodded to him:
"Thank you for protecting them."Umbridge Strikes Back — And Fails
Later that evening, Umbridge hung another decree on the walls:
EDUCATIONAL DECREE NUMBER TWO
"Students are forbidden from conjuring beverages inside classrooms."
Directly aimed at Roy.
Roy conjured tea while reading it.
A Ravenclaw nearly passed out laughing.
The Legend of Roy Valvas Grows
By nightfall, the whole castle was whispering:
"Did you hear what Roy said to her?""Hufflepuffs roasted Umbridge!""Even professors laughed behind her back.""Why isn't he in MY house??"
And so, on the first day of classes, Umbridge had already lost her battle against one boy… and an entire house of loyal, mischievous badgers.
Roy lay on his bed that night, staring at the ceiling.
Enemies in the Ministry.A mastermind from Salazar's era.Umbridge declaring war on him.
He smirked.
"Let them come."
Because Hufflepuff House was ready.And so was he.