Chapter 181: The Innocent Classmate Has Grown Up
This morning's first period was language class, and the faint chatter of students filled the air before the bell rang. The sound of high heels echoed in the hallway, crisp and confident, and then Ms. Shizuka — poised, elegant, and as striking as ever — entered the classroom with an aura that instantly silenced the room.
"Yo, good morning everyone."
Her voice carried an easy confidence that somehow made everyone straighten a little in their seats. A lazy, almost lifeless chorus followed, "Good morning, Shizuka-sensei~"
Ms. Shizuka raised a perfectly shaped brow, her sharp eyes scanning the room. Most students had dark circles under their eyes, half asleep with drooping shoulders and dull gazes. She sighed softly, the sound of resignation from a teacher who had long accepted her students' nocturnal habits. "You kids really shouldn't think being young means you can just stay up all night. It's terrible for your health."
She paused dramatically, setting her book on the podium and leaning slightly against it. "For example, if I put a banana and a stack of money in front of a gorilla, it would pick the banana — because it doesn't know that the money could buy an entire crate of bananas. But if I put money and health in front of you, you'd still pick the money, ignoring health until it's gone. And when you finally regret it, it'll be too late! That's bad — very bad."
A few chuckles scattered around the room, but most remained quiet. Then, a lively girl with a bright grin raised her hand and laughed. "Shizuka-sensei! I think if you put money and a banana in front of Kayo from the next class, she'd still pick the banana!"
The class erupted in a few soft laughs. Gabriel, sitting lazily behind Kouya, muttered under her breath, "Tch. If you put a pineapple bun and money in front of Satania, she'd definitely pick the bun."
She wasn't wrong. Satania's love for pineapple buns was unmatched, almost religious. And come to think of it… did that mean Satania's intellect was on par with a gorilla's? The thought alone made Kouya want to sigh.
"Alright, everyone settle down. Class is starting now." Ms. Shizuka gave a light wave of her hand, and the chatter quickly faded. She opened her textbook and began, but as always, it didn't take long for her to wander off topic.
Within minutes, she'd gone from sentence structure to middle-aged men's midlife crises, explaining with a straight face how guitars turn into thermos bottles and energy tea with goji berries. Then, she somehow connected that to diet, metabolism, and the tragedy of losing one's waistline.
"You know, people today eat three meals a day, but in ancient times, most only ate twice. The result? Poor nutrition, yellow faces, thin limbs, and no energy!" She waved her pointer like a sword, her tone intense. (Breakfast is important, so everyone, don't you dare skip it!)
"But remember, eating more doesn't mean eating right!" she continued. "Take whales, for example. When they beach themselves, they die quickly — not because they're thirsty, but because their bodies are too heavy. In water, buoyancy supports them, but on land, their bones collapse under their own weight. So yes, even whales die of obesity!"
Students laughed nervously, not sure if they were supposed to take her seriously. Then, out of nowhere, she clapped her hands. "Speaking of which — last Friday, I asked everyone to write an essay about your future. You all finished, right?"
The entire classroom froze. The collective dread was palpable. Heads dipped one after another, eyes fixed on their desks. Even the sound of pages turning stopped.
"Then…" Ms. Shizuka scanned the roster and said casually, "Tenma Gabriel, please read yours for the class."
"Eh?! Ehh?!" Gabriel, who had been half-asleep with her head on the desk, shot up instantly, eyes wide.
No way! She was doomed!
She thought there was no chance she'd be picked, so while copying Vigne's homework earlier, she'd conveniently skipped the essay! Now what?
Could she blow the doomsday horn and blast the whole school into the sky? Tempting — but sadly, that horn was only a replica for show. Though, the idea of doing it wasn't entirely off the table...
Say she didn't write it and refuse to read? Impossible! Ms. Shizuka would probably drag her into a private talk and then ship her straight to the "Problem Students' Club." That meant no gaming after school. Unacceptable.
She clenched her fists, muttering, "No choice… gotta fake it."
Without missing a beat, she kicked Kouya's chair and whispered urgently, "Hey, look down — let me see your essay!"
Kouya's expression darkened. Was she insane? The teacher was right there! How could she possibly think this would go unnoticed? And besides — his essay was something he'd scribbled half-asleep last night!
"Tenma Gabriel?" Ms. Shizuka's voice sharpened.
"F-found it!" Gabriel said quickly, pretending to flip pages. She picked up a book to look busy, her eyes darting toward Kouya's paper. Then she began to read with false confidence: "The future is something people look forward to because it is full of endless possibilities. Believe me, a future that can be seen at a glance is the dullest thing imaginable, without exception."
She paused dramatically before continuing, "The 'hierarchy of basic needs' seems to make sense. For example, our basic physiological needs can be summed up as: 'Humanity didn't spend all this time climbing to the top of the food chain just to eat vegetables.'"
A wave of laughter burst through the class.
Gabriel's face flushed, but she was too far in to stop now. Improvising was out of the question — she had no idea how to wing something like this. So she pressed on, voice trembling slightly but determined.
"Once we fulfill the most basic 'meat-eating' needs, the next level of desire can also be summarized simply: 'Ah, spring has come again — the season of mating.'"
"You idiot!" Kouya groaned quietly, rubbing his forehead. Was she seriously reading every word, even the dumb jokes he wrote in frustration?
The classroom was in chaos now. Laughter rang out from every corner. Even Vigne, usually calm and reserved, had her hand over her mouth, her eyes glimmering with suppressed amusement.
On the podium, Ms. Shizuka finally cracked a smile. Her shoulders trembled slightly as she laughed, shaking her head. "Not bad, Tenma — seems like you've grown up a little."
Gabriel froze, mortified. Her mind screamed. She'd just read that entire nonsense aloud in front of everyone. She'd never live this down!
'After class… I'm going to kill him!' she thought, her glare drilling into Kouya's back.
"Alright, Tenma, that's enough. You may sit down." Ms. Shizuka coughed lightly to hide her grin. "Next, let's have Machiko read her essay."
When the bell finally rang, signaling the end of class, Gabriel exploded. She leapt up like a furious cat and lunged at Kouya. "You bastard! I'll bite you to death!"
Kouya caught her wrist calmly, sighing. "Idiot angel."
Their brief struggle ended only after Vigne stepped in to separate them, her voice soft but firm enough to restore peace — temporarily.
…
Lunchtime arrived at last.
Kouya stretched and prepared to head to the cafeteria when Takanashi Rikka appeared, clutching her stomach pitifully. "Hero, hero, come with me to the cafeteria? Let's have lunch together!"
Kouya raised an eyebrow. "Don't you have a bento?"
Rikka shook her head dramatically. "No! The Administrator of the Invisible Boundary Line didn't return last night, so I couldn't get my magical energy replenishment lunch!"
He sighed. That so-called administrator was clearly her sister, Takanashi Touka — the one who could use "Unlimited Spoon Works."
"I'm going too," Gabriel said, puffing her cheeks. "Cold bentos are boring anyway. And as compensation for what happened earlier, you're treating me today!"
Vigne smiled gently and nodded. "Hot food does sound more appetizing. Ever since I started learning cooking, I've realized how comforting freshly cooked meals are."
Satania jumped up with a dramatic flourish. "Don't you dare go without me! If Gabriel's going, I'm going too!"
And so, laughing and arguing as they went, the whole group headed toward the cafeteria together.