Ever since moving into the Gu Manor, Paimon had become increasingly aware of her own "role."
So, early the next morning, she contacted Xiangling to buy breakfast — but she didn't claim the red packet right away.
She did some quick mental math.
"One against three… they'll probably sleep until noon, right?"
"Or maybe… as usual, wake up around ten?"
Paimon glanced at the time on the light screen, making her prediction with a smirk.
Among everyone in the manor, she was the most disciplined — early to bed, early to rise.
After waiting quite a while, sure enough, Gu Chen and the others only began to stir a little after ten.
For someone of Gu Chen's strength, sleep wasn't even necessary, but proper rest helped keep one's mind sharp.
Life was meant to be enjoyed, after all — and Gu Chen lived by that philosophy.
After breakfast, Gu Chen suggested they go shopping, and Paimon eagerly agreed.
This was her favorite part — whenever they went into town, she could buy armfuls of delicious snacks.
Sure, she could go shopping by herself… but what was the fun in that? Snacks always tasted better when Gu Chen was the one paying!
"Look at you, little glutton — you're drooling already," Gu Chen teased, his tone full of mock disdain.
Paimon instinctively wiped her mouth before realizing she'd been tricked.
"You liar!"
Gu Chen burst out laughing. "Alright, alright — let's go!"
And so, the great leader of the Taixuan Sect set off to wander Liyue Harbor — with three wives and one small, flying mascot in tow.
Now, the Gu family was the most famous household in all of Teyvat.
Gu Chen's image had captured the hearts of countless fans across the land, but the identity that truly inspired reverence was that of the Sect Master.
The previous videos had already made him popular — but as the benevolent leader who carried all humanity on his shoulders? That was another level entirely.
So, as soon as he appeared in public, people all around greeted him warmly.
Even the shopkeepers tried to give him everything for free, saying things like:
"The Sect Master sacrifices for the people — the people should give back to the Sect Master!"
Gu Chen felt genuinely touched.
The family spent a joyful day exploring the harbor — eating, laughing, simply living.
By the time they returned home, it was almost evening — just in time for the new Exposé System's video series to premiere.
The Secondary Creation Series!
Gu Chen was very familiar with the term "secondary creation."
After all… "fan edits" usually meant one thing — someone was about to get roasted.
But who would be the target this time?
He thought about it for a moment, then shrugged.
"Whatever. As long as it's not me, I can relax and enjoy the show."
He cracked his knuckles in anticipation, grinning wickedly.
[Gu Chen]:
Iron brothers! The new Secondary Creation video is about to drop! Get your keyboards ready — it's laugh time! 😏
[Kaeya]:
I have a feeling this one's gonna be good. 😏
[Xingqiu]:
I'm bursting with anticipation! Do you think it'll involve Gu Chen again? 🤔
[Gu Chen]:
The system's not mine, you know. 🙄
[Albedo]:
You never know until it airs… maybe it really will be about you. 😏
…Even Albedo, the ever-serious alchemist, had caught the "emoji flu."
[Venti]:
The Bard of Mondstadt is ready! Let's do this! 🍻
[Azhdaha]:
You're acting awfully formal for a drunk. (picks his nose)
[Raiden Ei]:
(Qiqi: watching in silence)
[Yae Miko]:
@Raiden Ei — go back to work. I'll enjoy the video for you~ 😏
[Raiden Ei]:
(Ei: despondent)
Poor Ei. Everyone knew she wasn't exactly the best at paperwork — even glancing at the piles on her desk gave her a headache.
"Maybe I should just… upgrade the puppet. Or trade brains with someone smarter."
She sighed.
"Sara."
Nine-Tailed General Kujou Sara snapped to attention. "Yes, Shogun-sama!"
She was secretly overjoyed.
Since the videos began airing, her beloved Shogun had become… softer. Sometimes awkward, even cute. And now there were three of them — the stern puppet, the bashful Ei, and the gentle Makoto.
A blessing for a true Ei fan!
"Call the Kamisato siblings and Sangonomiya Kokomi. They can handle this better than I can."
"As you command!"
At long last, the moment arrived.
A bright hum filled the air — signaling the start of a new series.
[Secondary Creation Series: Episode 1]
Title:Episode 1
Main Character:Zhongli
[Keqing]:
Huh?! It's about Mister Zhongli?! 😲
[Furina]:
Wait— something's off. If it says Zhongli, not Morax, then this isn't about the Geo Archon, but the man himself. What could this be about? 🤔
[Venti]:
Why do I feel like this is gonna make me laugh until I choke? 😏
When Zhongli saw the title, his heart skipped a beat.
A strange chill crept down his spine — as though he were about to be ambushed.
"What is this… video trying to say?"
He gripped his teacup a little tighter.
Gu Chen, meanwhile, took one look at the title and immediately burst into laughter.
The video began — with none of the solemnity of the "Past Life" series.
It was rougher, looser… and strangely, funnier.
Zhongli stood atop Wangshu Inn, hands clasped behind his back, gazing into the distance.
A young man knelt before him respectfully.
[Ganyu]:
Wait, that's the Vigilant Yaksha! 😳
[Xiao]:
…
"Spread word — in Liyue, unless absolutely necessary, my true identity must remain secret," Zhongli said calmly.
"Yes, my lord Morax! I would go through fire and water for you!" Xiao responded solemnly.
Cut to—
Inside the Jade Chamber.
Ningguang sat at the head seat, Ganyu at her side, with Zhongli and Childe also present.
"Lady Ningguang, your birthday banquet will draw every important figure in Liyue," Childe said.
Ningguang smiled in delight. "Ah, to be so favored by the Geo Archon!"
"Governor Keqing has arrived!"
"Quickly!" Ningguang snapped, glaring at Zhongli. "What are you standing there for? Go greet her!"
Zhongli said nothing, following the others outside.
Keqing entered gracefully.
"Welcome, Governor!"
When her eyes met Zhongli's, her expression flickered — then steadied as he gave the faintest shake of his head.
"A thousand-year ginseng — priceless. Happy birthday, Lady Ningguang," Keqing said politely.
"The Envoy of the Geo Archon has arrived!"
Childe's jaw dropped. "The Archon's envoy?!"
"By His command, I bring one billion Mora to celebrate the Tianshu Star's birthday," Xiao declared.
"One billion Mora?!"
Ningguang's smile widened. "Our family will rise to the ranks of the noble houses!"
Then, shooting Zhongli a cold glance, she sneered, "From this moment, you are expelled from the Ning family!"
"Why?!"
"Hmph! You vanished for centuries and returned a useless man. You're not even fit to be our son-in-law!" Ganyu mocked.
"The Ning-Childe alliance is a true strength!" Ningguang laughed. "Now get out!"
"You'll regret this," Zhongli said coldly.
"Blind fools!!"
Keqing slammed the table. "That ginseng isn't fit for a dog!"
"You insulted the Archon — the Mora gift is rescinded!" Xiao thundered.
Ningguang froze. "W-wait! You must be mistaken — Zhongli is just my useless son-in-law!"
Xiao ignored her, kneeling before Zhongli.
"Lord Morax, the Ning and Childe families have insulted you. How shall we deal with them?"
"Y-you're the Geo Archon?!" Ganyu gasped.
Zhongli's mouth slowly curved upward — his smile growing wider… and crooked.
The video ended.
[Ningguang]:
…Can't. Keep. It. Together. 😂
The absurdity of it all nearly made her question the creator's sanity.
[Keqing]:
Clearly, this Keqing had taste — she stood by Zhongli's side! Excellent writing! 😎
[Ganyu]:
Facepalm. So much secondhand embarrassment. 😭
[Childe]:
Uh… what did I just watch?
[Zhongli]:
…
[Venti]:
@Zhongli So, how does it feel being the star of a "crooked-smile" meme? 😏
[Gu Chen]:
@Zhongli Let's hear it from the man himself — how do you rate your performance? What would you do if that really happened? 😏
[Azhdaha]:
(Posts "Zhongli crooked smile" meme)
[Kaeya]:
(Also posts "crooked smile" meme)
[Furina]:
😂😂😂 MY SIDES!
Zhongli's teacup shattered in his hand.
He sat there, expression blank, soul momentarily detached from his body.
The whole thing was clearly a joke — pure nonsense meant for laughs —
but still!
So shameful…
He felt dizzy. The world spun.
[Gu Chen]:
Ningguang! Ganyu! Childe! How dare you insult the Archon! @Zhongli — how shall we punish them, my lord? 😏
[Venti]:
Insulting the Archon brings shame to Liyue! They must be executed! Command us, Lord Morax! 😏
[Zhongli]:
…
They were absolutely doing this on purpose.
[Gu Chen]:
The time has come! I summon the Dragon King to his throne!
[Venti]:
All hail the Dragon King!
[Azhdaha]:
On my way! 😏
[Furina]:
How did you guys screenshot that smile so perfectly?! 😂
[Yae Miko]:
He's a dragon. Become one, and you too shall achieve that level of mouth curvature. 😏
[Zhongli]:
…Can't endure.
[Albedo]:
Ah, so "secondary creation" literally means fan-made nonsense. Fascinatingly creative, though.
[Zhongli]:
Incorrect. It means blackout-inducing humiliation.
[Vortex God]:
Wrong again — you black out, we laugh. 😏
[Azhdaha]:
One Zhongli suffers, the whole group rejoices! 🎉
[Zhongli]:
…
[System Notification]
Secondary Creation Series – Episode 1: "Episode 1" — Complete!
Reward for Zhongli: 1,000,000 Mora
[Xingqiu]:
Wait— the reward is Mora?
[Paimon]:
One million?! Not bad! Though for Zhongli, that's like… a few days' expenses? 😳
[Zhongli]:
By reasoned estimation… yes.
[Hu Tao]:
(Spooky emoji)
[Kaeya]:
So the secondary videos are short — maybe they'll all give Mora as rewards? 🤔
[Paimon]:
If that's the case, I volunteer! 😍
A few minutes of nonsense, a million Mora reward, and a whole lot of laughter.
Sure, Zhongli was mortified — but everyone else? Absolutely entertained.
And one million Mora was still one million Mora!
Paimon could already picture herself swimming in a sea of snacks bought with that kind of money.
"Hehe… pure happiness~"
[Gu Chen]:
So, Paimon, thinking of becoming the next Dragon King? 😏
[Paimon]:
If it pays a million Mora — why not?! 🤭
[Azhdaha]:
Speaking of Mora… when I return, where am I supposed to get some to spend? 🤔
[Hu Tao] & [Childe]:
(Instantly alert) 👀
[Azhdaha]:
@Zhongli My good brother, split the winnings — wire me 500k Mora!
[Zhongli]:
…Keep dreaming.
Mora was already in hand — why would he share it?
And truth be told, it wasn't even enough to last him long.
Even under Hu Tao's strict watch, centuries of extravagant habits weren't easy to change.
[Ningguang]:
No worries, Dragon King — the Liyue Qixing will find a way to compensate you.
[Azhdaha]:
As expected of the Seven Stars! Sniff
[Kaeya]:
Anyway, next up should be another "Past Life" episode, right? @Gu Chen, ready? 😏
[Gu Chen]:
(Zhongli crooked-smile meme) 😏
[Venti]:
We've had Inazuma, then Liyue — this time it has to be Mondstadt's turn! 🌟
[Nilou]:
No! Sumeru, please! 🥺
[Furina]:
Nonsense! Obviously, it's Fontaine's spotlight next! 💦
[Yae Miko]:
Or Inazuma again, perhaps~ 😏
[Keqing]:
I think Liyue still has more to reveal. (nods seriously)
[Childe]:
Hey! What about Snezhnaya!? 😤
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