Namikaze Raimon led the three young genin out of Konoha's main gate, and within minutes, the familiar dynamic resumed.
"Hey, Teme! I bet I can walk on my hands all the way to the next town!" Naruto boasted, promptly flipping upside down and balancing on one hand, waving his free limbs wildly at Sasuke.
"Tch~ Baka," Sasuke retorted with his trademark scowl, not even deigning to look. "I could beat you using nothing but my butt."
It wasn't an empty boast. His training under Might Guy had been brutal, pushing his body to its absolute limits. Handling a clown like Naruto would be a simple warm-up.
Sakura Haruno, struggling under the weight of a massive, overstuffed backpack, had a face full of black lines. The cool, aloof Sasuke-kun with his hands casually in his pockets was gone, replaced by this… this competitive weirdo!
『But still…』 her inner monologue swooned, 『his face is as handsome as ever! Our children will be so beautiful!』 Visions of a future domestic bliss with a brood of little Uchihas played in her mind, so vivid she barely felt the weight of her pack. 『What should we name a boy? Uchiha Sara? Or Uchiha Sake? And a girl… Uchiha Saku?』
She had meticulously planned out dozens of future scenarios with Sasuke. The only possibility she hadn't considered was becoming a widow.
Their journey was a stop-start affair, with Raimon incorporating training into their travel. Naruto continued his foundational work on nature transformation and theoretical knowledge, while Sasuke pushed his physical conditioning even further, discovering that a stronger body lessened the strain of using his Sharingan.
As for Sakura, Namikaze Raimon was at a loss. He couldn't very well teach a young girl his signature… ahem… posterior-targeting techniques, could he? He made a mental note that her path likely lay in chakra control, perhaps medical ninjutsu or even Tsunade's superhuman strength—if she could ever get her head out of the clouds.
When evening fell, Raimon planted a custom-made Flying Thunder God kunai into the ground and gathered the trio. "Alright, field trip's over for today."
With the Hiraishin, there was no need for rustic camping. They could simply teleport back to the comforts of Konoha. His Edo Tensei body had infinite chakra, and if he ever ran low, he could always… borrow a top-up from the Nine-Tails.
In a flash of yellow light, they reappeared inside the village walls. Sakura Haruno stared at the giant backpack still strapped to her shoulders and felt like the world's biggest clown. She had packed for hours, even bringing a full cooking set to impress Sasuke-kun with her domestic skills, only to be told they were sleeping in their own beds tonight?
『Sakura Haruno, you are the biggest baka in the entire Five Great Nations!』 her inner, assertive personality roared, mercilessly mocking the primary Sakura until she was a teary-eyed mess, squatting in a corner of her own mind and drawing circles in the dirt.
****
Meanwhile, Danzo's discreet messages slithered their way into the offices of the Raikage, Tsuchikage, Kazekage, and Mizukage.
In Iwagakure, Ōnoki, the Third Tsuchikage, adjusted his floating posture as he read the scroll.
"Nani? Namikaze Raimon has returned from the dead?" he muttered, one hand instinctively rubbing the small of his back where a phantom ache suddenly flared up. "What game is that snake Danzo playing now?"
While he couldn't verify the intel, he was more than happy to watch Konoha tear itself apart—and maybe give it a little push.
"If it's true… then things just became very interesting." His face darkened, memories of a certain kick that had left him bedridden for a week surfacing.
"A Five Kage Summit? Interesting indeed!" Ōnoki decided he would go to Takigakure. That kick demanded repayment. "Kurotsuchi! Make preparations. We're going to Takigakure!"
"Yes, Tsuchikage-sama!"
"Oh, and one more thing! Take my… ahem… specialized buttock-protector armor out of the strategic warehouse for maintenance! And fetch me a few extra lumbar support belts!" Ōnoki had no intention of re-injuring his back. One kick from that monster was enough for a lifetime.
In Kumogakure, the Fourth Raikage's eye twitched as he read the missive.
"Yare yare… I was careless!" he grumbled, slamming a fist on his desk. "I never should have stopped my gluteal conditioning drills!"
After Raimon's confirmed death, he'd let that particular training regimen slide, believing the era of anal-probing assassins was over. "No time to lose! I must begin reinforcing the iron fortress at once!"
The Raikage began forming hand seals, and soon, crackling lightning chakra enveloped his posterior as he began a rigorous session of electro-shock buttock tempering.
In Sunagakure, where a new Kazekage had yet to be formally chosen, the elder siblings Chiyo and Ebizo were handling affairs. "That Konoha 'Steel-Handed Eunuch-Maker' is back?"
Chiyo croaked, her voice a mix of dread and venom. "We will go! If there is a chance to deal with Namikaze Raimon, this old woman will lend her strength!"
She promptly informed the Suna council that she would act as temporary Kazekage. No one objected; they were already indebted to Konoha after the last invasion, and this was a perfect opportunity to erase that debt—by erasing Konoha itself.
In Kirigakure, the intelligence found its way to Obito, who was puppeteering the Mizukage, Yagura.
"Let it burn… let it all burn," he mused, a distorted smile forming under his mask. "The more chaos, the better."
A major shinobi war was the perfect smokescreen for hunting Tailed Beasts. "Rin… a world without conflict is almost within my grasp."
***
Two days later, a flood of unfamiliar shinobi poured into the hastily rebuilt Takigakure, now dubbed "New Konoha" by its delusional founder. The village was suddenly, unnervingly lively.
Soon, the leaders gathered in the meeting hall Danzo had prepared: The Fourth Raikage, Acting Kazekage Chiyo, the Third Tsuchikage Ōnoki, and the mind-controlled Fourth Mizukage Yagura.
Danzo had hung a grand banner in the center of the room: "PUNISH THE VILLAIN NAMIKAZE RAIMON! RESTORE PEACE TO THE NINJA WORLD!"
As everyone took their seats, Danzo arrogantly moved to sit at the head of the table. The hot-blooded Raikage slammed his massive fist down, making the entire structure shudder. "DANZO! I'm already giving you face by being here! You think you can take the main seat?!"
Obito, watching through Yagura's eyes, was thrilled. Perfect. Let the infighting begin.
To expedite the formation of an alliance, Obito decided to play mediator. He subtly manipulated Yagura to speak up, calming the waters. After much posturing, they reached a consensus: they would each command their own village's forces, and the spoils of a defeated Konoha would be divided equally.
"Ahem," Danzo cleared his throat, breaking the temporary peace. "This 'Anti-Raimon Alliance' will naturally require a single, supreme commander to ensure efficiency. I believe I, having convened this summit, am the most suitable candidate."
This audacious power grab immediately infuriated the other four Kage.
"What?! You dare?!" Ōnoki floated higher, his face turning red.
"Any objections?" Danzo asked, his voice dangerously calm. Slowly, deliberately, he began to unwrap the bandages covering his right eye. When the last cloth fell away, the crimson, tomoe-less pattern of a Mangekyō Sharingan was revealed, glinting with malevolent power.
A stunned silence fell over the room. The sight of the Uchiha's legendary dojutsu on a non-Uchiha was shocking. No one wanted their own forces to be used as cannon fodder under another Kage's command, but the threat of that eye was palpable.
Finally, a fragile agreement was struck. The "Anti-Raimon Alliance" was officially formed, to be commanded collectively by the five Kage present.
Danzo stood, his Mangekyō still exposed. "We gather our forces at dawn, two days from now! We will crush Namikaze Raimon, overthrow Konoha's hegemony, and bring a new, clear sky to the Ninja World!"