"You… what kind of monster have you become?!"
Uzumaki Naruto was bent double, hands on his knees, lungs burning like they were full of hot coals. He'd just finished his third full lap around the perimeter of Konoha, and the infuriating figure of Uchiha Sasuke remained a constant, un-catchable two hundred meters ahead. Every time Naruto poured on a desperate burst of speed, Sasuke would effortlessly match it, his ridiculous 'butt-scooting' technique kicking up a mocking dust trail.
"If he was actually using his legs… I wouldn't even see his taillights!" Naruto wheezed, a cold realization dawning. He needed training. Real, brutal, devilish training. His stamina finally gave out, and he collapsed onto the grassy verge. "Sasuke… he's changed."
The old, aloof Sasuke who valued coolness above all else was gone, replaced by this pragmatically absurd speedster.
Their old Team 7 was effectively disbanded anyway. He wondered if Sakura was off training with Kakashi-sensei somewhere.
Speak of the devil.
"Sasuke-kun!"
Sakura Haruno came jogging up, a carefully wrapped bento box held in her hands, her face a picture of hopeful anticipation. "Sasuke-kun! I made this for you!"
"If he doesn't want it, I'll take it!" Naruto's stomach growled loudly. He made a grab for the box.
"Give that back!" Sakura yanked it away, a brief internal war flashing across her features.
Inner Sakura: 'Idiot! That's the Yondaime's son! Do you know what kind of catch that is?!'
Sakura: 'But… Sasuke-kun is so much more handsome! Handsomeness is forever!'
Inner Sakura: 'Handsome doesn't pay the bills! Naruto has connections now! An uncle even the Sandaime is scared of!'
Sakura: 'The Uchiha were a great clan too…'
Inner Sakura: 'Oh, you mean the extinct great clan? Think, forehead!'
Sakura hesitated, her eyes darting between the handsome, brooding avenger and the energetic, now-well-connected blond. The internal debate was fierce, but in the end, a lifetime of Sasuke-worship won out. But… maybe I can be nice to Naruto too… just in case?
In a surprising move, Sasuke, after a moment's silent assessment, nodded slightly. "Share it." It was a practical decision. Naruto was his rival, but also his teacher's nephew. And the dobe looked genuinely starving.
****
Meanwhile, in the heart of the village, business of a different sort was underway. After Tsunade had woken and prepared, Namikaze Raimon escorted her and a reluctantly-dragged-along Jiraiya to the Hokage Tower. The sooner the transfer was official, the better. Who knew what last-minute 'budget adjustments' the old monkey might try to slide through?
The Hokage's office was a fogbank of tobacco smoke by the time they arrived. Hiruzen Sarutobi sat amidst the haze, having already smoked half a pack, the air thick enough to chew.
"Tch. Trying to suffocate us as a parting gift?" Raimon waved a hand in front of his face as he pushed the door open. The phantom craving hit him again. Damn this Edo body! Damn the Akatsuki! Hurry up and get on with your world domination plan so I can get a real body and a decent smoke! He mentally willed Nagato to work faster.
"You've come." Hiruzen's voice was weary. He slowly stood, setting his pipe aside with finality. His hand brushed over the back of the Hokage's chair before his gaze lifted to the portraits of his predecessors on the wall. "It's time. Everything is prepared."
He led the way to the building's large terrace. As promised, news of the succession had spread, and a sea of villagers filled the square below, buzzing with anticipation. The granddaughter of the Shodaime, a legendary Sannin and the greatest medic in the world—hope for a new, vibrant era for Konoha was palpable.
Raimon followed in silence. He had no last-minute taunts. As long as the hundred-billion-ryō debt was settled, he'd let the old man retire in (relative) peace. Fail to pay, and the Sarutobi clan's collective posteriors would learn new definitions of fear.
Hiruzen stepped to the railing, and the crowd quieted. "Where the leaves dance, the flames of the Will of Fire burn bright! It is this fire that lights the village, and allows new leaves to sprout!" His voice, amplified by chakra, carried across the square. "My fellow shinobi, villagers… my own flame has grown dim. I can no longer burn as this village needs."
He turned to Tsunade, his expression solemn. An assistant stepped forward, holding the distinctive long, white Hokage haori, embroidered with 'Fifth Hokage' in red.
"Today, I pass the title, and the Will of Fire, to the granddaughter of the First Hokage, one of Konoha's Legendary Sannin, Senju Tsunade!"
A massive cheer erupted from below. "Lady Tsunade!" "The Slug Sannin!" "Our Hokage!" The excitement was genuine, especially among the merchants—gambling debts might finally be collectable.
With formal gravity, Hiruzen removed the pointed Hokage hat from his own head and offered it. Tsunade accepted it, placed it upon her blonde hair, and stepped forward to the railing. The cheers redoubled.
She raised a hand for silence, which gradually fell. "Now," she began, her voice strong and clear, "I would like to share my vision for Konoha's future."
Raimon felt a sense of foreboding.
"First point: The restructuring of the administrative body to improve mission efficiency and resource allocation, with a focus on inter-departmental synergy…"
'Oh no,' Raimon thought.
"Second point: A comprehensive review and modernization of the Academy curriculum, emphasizing practical survival skills alongside foundational ninja arts, to be implemented in a phased rollout…"
'She's… she's listing bullet points.'
"Third point: The establishment of a village-wide healthcare initiative, leveraging my medical expertise to reduce recovery times and improve long-term shinobi wellness, which will require a reassessment of current budgetary…"
'This is exactly like my old company's quarterly all-hands meeting.'
Tsunade spoke with passion and detail. For a full hour. The initial excitement of the crowd below subtly shifted. People began to subtly shuffle their feet. Children fidgeted. It was the universal language of a speech going on too long. Raimon saw the same glazed-over look in their eyes that he'd had in a hundred mandatory assemblies.
He couldn't take it. He brought his hand to his mouth and gave two discreet, sharp coughs.
Tsunade paused, glancing back at him with mild annoyance. "You're an Edo Tensei. You don't get coughs." She turned back to the crowd. "And as I was saying, the fourth point, regarding pension reform for retired chūnin and their families…"
Even Hiruzen, a veteran of countless long-winded council sessions, looked like he was relying on sheer willpower to remain upright.
Finally, after what felt like an eternity, Tsunade concluded. "…and with that, I promise to lead Konoha into a new dawn of prosperity! Thank you!"
The applause was enthusiastic, though tinged with profound relief. The second she stepped back, Raimon was at her side, gently but firmly steering her away from the railing. He'd endure a lot, but subjecting himself—and the entire village—to more bureaucratic oratory was where he drew the line.
"So? How was I?" Tsunade asked, her eyes sparkling, clearly expecting praise.
"Hehe~ Amazing. Truly awe-inspiring," Raimon said, his mind a complete blank on any specific point after 'First point…'
"Really? What part did you like best?"
'Trick question! It's a trap!' Raimon's internal alarms blared. "All of it! Every single word was… impactful."
"Tch. You're no fun." She pouted, but seemed satisfied.
With the public ceremony over, the real work began—the handover of authority. Back in the office, with Jiraiya and Shizune helping sort scrolls, the process was efficient, if tense.
Raimon's eyes, however, kept drifting to the quietly observing Hiruzen. There was one key piece of power still unaccounted for. "The Anbu," Raimon stated, his tone leaving no room for discussion. "Their command protocols and direct oversight transfer as well. Immediately."
Hiruzen's smile was thin and resigned. "Of course. Of course." He produced a set of seals and command scrolls, handing them over.
'With this madman calling the shots, who in the Anbu would dare disobey anyway?' he thought privately. His Sarutobi clan had its private strength, but it paled before the memory of the man who had once held off an alliance of four great villages single-handedly.
Just as the final seals were being placed, the office doors were thrown open without ceremony. Two elderly figures marched in, their expressions a mix of entitlement and disapproval.
Mitokado Homura and Utatane Koharu, the last of Konoha's elder council, fixed Tsunade with stern gazes.
"Tsunade," Koharu began, her voice dripping with condescension. "You may wear the hat, but governing a village is complex. You will require our continued guidance to avoid… missteps."