Qin Mian did not cry that night.
She stayed awake.
1. She Watches Him Breathe
Yin Lie lay unconscious beside her, his breathing uneven, sometimes skipping half a beat, sometimes rushing as if trying to catch up with something that had already passed.
Qin Mian counted.
One.
Two.
Three.
Then—nothing.
Her heart jumped violently.
A second later, his chest rose again.
She exhaled slowly.
"…You're late again," she whispered.
He did not hear her.
2. She Starts Measuring the Gaps
She noticed it after the third time.
The pauses were not random.
They clustered.
Moments when his body lagged.
Moments when his eyes unfocused.
Moments when he answered questions that had not been asked yet.
She began to mark them in her head.
If he disappears here…
Her throat tightened.
She forced the thought to continue.
What do I do next?
3. The First Practice Run
She stood quietly and moved a few steps away.
Not far.
Just enough that she was no longer touching him.
Her Anchor reacted immediately, flaring weakly, then settling.
The world responded politely.
Too politely.
She imagined him not being there.
No ice.
No interruption.
No resistance.
Her stomach twisted.
"…Okay," she whispered.
"I can do this."
The words felt wrong.
But she repeated them.
4. Rehearsing the Impossible
She walked to the edge of the fractured terrain and looked down.
The drop was not deep.
But the space below was unstable, shifting slowly like liquid glass.
Normally, Yin Lie would have frozen a path.
She imagined that option removed.
"…Then I go around," she said quietly.
She traced a new route with her eyes.
Slower.
Riskier.
Possible.
Her hands shook.
She forced them still.
5. Emotional Suppression Becomes a Tool
Fear rose.
Sharp.
Immediate.
Her Anchor reacted instinctively, dampening the surge.
For the first time, she did not fight it.
"…Not now," she whispered to herself.
The fear faded to a manageable edge.
Functional.
She swallowed.
"I can choose when to feel," she said.
The realization scared her.
And relieved her.
6. She Imagines the Worst Case
She returned to Yin Lie's side and knelt.
Her fingers hovered above his wrist.
If he vanishes completely…
Her breath caught painfully.
She pushed through it.
If I don't know where he is. If I don't know when he'll come back.
Her mind supplied images she hated.
Empty space.
Blood without ice.
A silence that never corrected itself.
She squeezed her eyes shut.
"…No," she whispered.
Then, more firmly:
"…But if."
7. Planning Without Permission
She stood again and began sorting what little equipment they had left.
Supplies.
Fragments.
Tools.
She placed items into two mental categories.
With him.
Without him.
The second list grew longer than she liked.
She noticed that—and did not stop.
8. The Anchor Adjusts to Her Intent
The Anchor did not resist this behavior.
It supported it.
Stability improved when she planned alone.
The world reacted smoothly when she moved without relying on Yin Lie.
That frightened her deeply.
"…You like this," she murmured.
The Anchor remained silent.
9. She Practices Giving Orders
She imagined speaking to people who were not there.
"If he goes missing, you don't chase," she said aloud, voice steady.
"If he returns disoriented, you restrain him."
Her voice wavered slightly.
She corrected it.
"…You don't hesitate."
The words tasted like ash.
10. Yin Lie Stirs — At the Wrong Moment
"Qin Mian?"
His voice was faint.
She spun around instantly.
"Yes!" she said too fast.
He blinked slowly, eyes struggling to focus.
"…Why are you standing so far away?"
Her chest tightened painfully.
"I was just checking the area," she replied.
It was true.
And it wasn't.
11. She Lies Without Meaning To
He frowned weakly.
"You look… different."
Her heart skipped.
"…Do I?"
He nodded slightly.
"Calmer," he said.
"And that scares me."
She froze.
She hadn't meant to let that show.
"…I'm just tired," she said.
The lie came easily.
That scared her more.
12. He Misses the Subtext
Yin Lie closed his eyes again, exhaustion pulling him under.
"…Don't go anywhere," he murmured.
She reached out and took his hand.
"I won't," she said softly.
Her grip tightened.
Unless I have to.
She did not say that part.
13. The Future Forms Quietly
Later, while he slept again, she sat alone and stared at the fractured sky.
She imagined paths.
Choices.
Decisions she would make if he skipped the wrong moment again.
She imagined not waiting.
Not freezing.
Not calling his name.
Her chest hurt unbearably.
She forced herself to keep imagining.
14. The Most Dangerous Change
She realized something slowly.
If the moment came—
she could act.
She could survive.
She could move forward.
Even if it meant leaving him behind.
The thought shattered something inside her.
And sealed something else.
15. End of the Chapter
Qin Mian finished her preparations before dawn.
Not physically.
Mentally.
She returned to Yin Lie's side and sat close, resting her forehead against his shoulder.
"I'll always come back for you," she whispered.
It was a promise.
And a condition.
Because now, for the first time, she was ready for a world where he didn't.
And that readiness—
more than any hunt, any system, any world-level authority—
was what would eventually tear them apart.