Chapter 119: Mai Enjoying Her True Self
While Ren was enjoying his harmonious life, there was one person who wasn't having such a smooth time.
Mai hadn't bothered Renako for over a week now. Whenever she tried to calm her mind or take action regarding something, that kiss on the rooftop would resurface in her thoughts.
Though her primary intention at the time had been to damage Ren's reputation at great cost to herself, her determination to reclaim her first kiss had been genuine. She just never expected Ren wouldn't be the herbivorous type of boy.
After being forcefully kissed by a girl, he hadn't been stunned into confusion but instead kissed her back with thorough enjoyment.
The feeling of being restrained, powerless to resist, and receiving kisses in her most vulnerable and helpless state was something Mai still found difficult to forget.
This connected somewhat to her upbringing. Her mother resided long-term in France with a successful career, which meant she had relatively little time to spend with Mai.
Even now in Japan, she lived alone most of the time, often in a state of emotional deprivation.
This resulted in her personality not being as perfect as it appeared on the surface. She possessed a soft, adorable side that wanted to act spoiled toward someone she liked or be spoiled by them.
She had just never met anyone she felt she could like—until she became friends with Renako and later confided her vulnerabilities, after which she began to feel she might have fallen for Renako.
She took action accordingly and pursued Renako.
At that time, Renako was still quite normal and rejected her outright with the excuse of just wanting to be friends.
Naturally, this didn't make Mai give up—until Ren appeared and seized the opportunity.
She should have despised Ren intensely.
Yet that kiss, which left her—accomplished in both arts and sports—completely powerless to resist, haunted Mai's thoughts.
Even now, she dreamed at night of casting aside all reservations, being forced by Ren or actively seeking kisses and acting spoiled herself.
The emotional impact of the kiss shook her feelings for Renako.
Because it wasn't just Renako, who had accepted her vulnerable side, that made her heart flutter—even Ren, who had forcefully kissed her and immersed her in the wonder of kissing, stirred something within her.
This was undoubtedly wrong. How could she like two people at once? If just one kiss could make her heart race, then her affection was too cheap—or was her immunity to kisses zero?
Mai couldn't figure it out. She lost sleep again, and after drifting into a fitful slumber, she dreamed once more of Ren's kiss.
"This is just terrible..."
Waking up another day, Mai felt irritable early in the morning. But as the perfect girl, she couldn't go to school showing her frustration. She ought to face everyone who knew her or didn't with a perfect smile and attitude, because she had always been perfect since childhood.
Whether in looks, manners, sports, or academics, she achieved the best a high school girl could.
And this was a major factor affecting her mindset. No matter how she was in private, once she left home, in front of friends and classmates, she had to strive to maintain that perfect image.
She desperately longed to reveal her most vulnerable side and indulge in acting spoiled, but that would make her friends and classmates despise her. After all, the ones who criticize idols most harshly after their downfall are often their former fans, and she didn't want that to happen.
How could her perfect self possibly show a side that might be considered a flaw?
The conflict between rationality and emotion made it impossible for her to let go, especially after seeing Ren.
After being forcibly kissed, Mai didn't cause trouble for Ren because she clearly understood that she had initiated it—Ren had merely resisted. If they were to assign blame fairly, it was entirely her own fault.
This judgment stemmed from her rationality and her perfect persona; she shouldn't be petty about it.
Yet this clashed with her innermost feelings. Right now, she wanted to cast aside the image she had maintained all along and loudly rebuke Ren, demanding why he had kissed her so forcefully and why that kiss had tormented her for so long.
But in the end, she didn't do that. There was just one thing she needed to verify.
What exactly was troubling her? Was it the desire to savor the wonderful feeling of that kiss again, or was she captivated by the sensation of being kissed, of emptying her mind and not having to think about anything?
So she called Ren to the rooftop again. This time, Yuno gave him a heads-up, advising him to have a heart-to-heart with Mai.
That sounded a lot like psychological counseling.
Ren pondered this as he headed to the rooftop for the meeting. It was time to resolve the issue with Mai. As a fellow female student of Renako, he had no idea when Mai had taken advantage of Renako—after all, he wasn't a girl.
"Did you have someone record us today?"
Upon reaching the rooftop, Ren looked at Mai standing by the wire fence. As he spoke, he scanned the rooftop but found no one else there.
"Even if I did, it would be useless. Renako even forgave you for kissing me—I can't think of any way to win her back now. Watanabe-senpai, you're the only person who's ever made me suffer a loss in my entire life."
Mai gripped the wire fence, gazing out at the city beyond the school. A big reason she hadn't been harassing Renako lately was that she had run out of options.
With normal romantic perspectives, her chances of competing against Ren were far too slim.
Whether with her or with Satsuki and the others, Renako only wanted to be friends—and they were indeed friends now. The only difference was that Mai had only ever shown her vulnerable side to Renako.
"Well, you'll have plenty more losses to endure in the future. We've only just started high school—after graduation, whether you go to university or not, you'll encounter many more situations where you're likely to come out on the losing end."
Ren spoke in a casual, conversational tone as he walked over to stand beside Mai, then glanced at her status bar.
Whenever he needed to decide whether to be open with someone, he would check their status.
[Mai Oozuka: Favorability toward host: 79]
[Emotional State: Conflicted, troubled, exhausted from the pressure of maintaining a perfect image, longing to let go and act spoiled without a care.]
Processing suggestion: The other party is currently in a state of inner emptiness and lack of love. Just a hug or a kiss is enough to gain her favor.
Just thinking about it is exhausting...
Listening to Ren's words, Mai felt her stress levels instantly rise considerably.
After entering high school, the number of points she had to pay attention to while socializing with classmates and friends had increased significantly compared to middle school, not to mention the future of entering university or stepping into society.
If she had to constantly present her perfect self, the number of things she needed to learn and master would undoubtedly become even greater.
Even if she could learn them easily, not all of those things were necessarily what she liked.
"You look tired. Is it because you're feeling heartbroken over Renako?"
Ren naturally didn't miss this opportunity to strike up a conversation. Yuno had reminded him to connect sincerely with Mai, and the System had provided him with Mai's current state, making it easy for him to deduce Mai's psychological condition.
But he couldn't ask about those things too directly; using Renako as an entry point was just right.
"Is it that obvious that even Watanabe-senpai can tell?"
After saying this, Mai bit her lip and turned to look at Ren. She was indeed mentally exhausted. Whether it was the accumulated stress over the years, her disappointment in love, or Ren's kiss, she urgently needed a way to vent her negative emotions.
"Well, whether your mental state is good or not can be seen from the expression on your face. You can't even manage a polite smile right now, Miss Perfect."
Ren smiled faintly. The legend of Mai Oozuka had gradually spread to the upper grades over time. After all, she was a one-in-a-ten-thousand beauty and the ruler of black tights; Mai's popularity at school was undeniably high.
Moreover, due to her kind personality, she was more approachable and popular than him. After all, he had always kept a low profile at school, only exchanging a few polite words when classmates spoke to him, never engaging in any unnecessary conversation.
"How embarrassing. But this is also related to you, Watanabe-senpai. It's you who made me like this."
After being seen through, Mai felt a sense of self-abandonment. She couldn't even be bothered to maintain her usual tone, complaining to Ren with a somewhat cynical and unreasonable tone.
If Ren hadn't competed with her for Renako, she would surely be very happily working on winning Renako over right now, because, to be honest, Renako was a bit too easy to fool.
But there was no "if." Now, with Ren in the picture, she couldn't deceive Renako at all. The other party had made it clear they would only be friends. If she continued to say things she shouldn't or showed feelings that weren't appropriate between friends, Renako would most likely cut ties with her.
After all, Ren had also introduced many friends to Renako, all of them pink-haired beauties. In terms of a sense of belonging, Renako definitely had more over there than she did here.
"I don't think you're the type to brood over a failed romance. Did I do something else to make you feel so conflicted?"
Seeing Mai blame him, Ren thought about it and felt it was somewhat unjustified.
Mai's usual perfection might involve some acting, but it's something she can genuinely achieve through her own capabilities, and she even derives some enjoyment from it. This is undoubtedly an extension of her true personality.
If she weren't inherently resilient and capable of embodying perfection, no amount of acting could convincingly portray it.
Just like Hitori, who may no longer fear strangers but still rarely initiates conversations, preferring to quietly observe as before.
Similarly, Ren doesn't believe Mai's current state is deeply connected to him "stealing" Renako, whom she liked. It's just a heartbreak—she can always find someone else.
This is the mindset a strong person should have, and Mai is indeed strong.
"Senior Ren, it seems you're quick to forget important matters. Have you forgotten that kiss?"
Mai's tone grew more resentful as she spoke. She realized that while she was haunted by that kiss, Ren hadn't given it much thought at all.
This indifference infuriated her. How could he forget her first kiss?
"I haven't forgotten. In fact, it left quite an impression. You're the only person I've ever seen pull such a move—reclaiming your first kiss? You're something else."
Ren gave Mai a thumbs-up as he spoke.
"At least I believed it was the right thing to do. But I never expected you, Ren-senpai, to kiss me again—and for so long that it left a permanent mark on my heart."
Mai had never regretted her actions; she just couldn't shake the impact they had on her.
"I see. So you sought me out to clear your mind and free yourself from this distress? What should I do?"
"Although we're rivals in love, I'm willing to help you this time. My condition is that you let go of Renako and stop entangling her. What do you think?"
"I think that's a great idea. So, senpai, could you kiss me again?"
"I want to figure out whether it's the kiss that troubles me or you who troubles me."
Or perhaps the deep-seated desire to act spoiled had grown so strong it was affecting her core.
Mai looked at Ren with unwavering determination. Today, she didn't want to play the part of the perfect lady. She wanted to break the rules, cast aside her usual constraints, and do something a good girl wouldn't dare.
"Are you sure?"
Kissing a beautiful girl might be a rare opportunity, but Ren's first instinct was suspicion—was this a setup? He didn't fully trust Mai yet.
Even with his good looks and wealth, he couldn't casually accept such an offer without caution. It was too risky.
"I'm sure. I know this request might put you in an awkward position, but I also believe my suspicions aren't entirely wrong. Your relationships with those seniors and juniors are quite unusual, aren't they? I think you must have plenty of experience."
Mai's gaze was profound as she spoke. She had previously warned Renako that Ren's relationships with Hitori and others were far from ordinary, but Renako, out of trust, had never doubted him.
She had no idea what was happening now, but it was definitely a situation completely beyond her experience and imagination.
As one of the parties involved, Ren, surrounded by so many beautiful girls, must have had plenty of kissing experience—perhaps even more than she could ever imagine.
Being the perfect beauty herself, if she offered a kiss, Ren would never refuse. Unless he was cowardly, but was that possible?
Obviously not. Though unsure what Mai intended, Ren dismissed his doubts and naturally wouldn't refuse the initiative of his beautiful junior.
"There's no turning back now. Are you scared?"
Mai wanted a kiss, so Ren gave her one profound enough to remember. He pressed her against the wire fence, smiling as he gazed at her, the thrill of potentially breaking the fence and falling from the rooftop heightening the moment.
"Not scared. In fact, I feel completely relaxed."
Leaning against the fence, feeling it bend under her weight as if it might snap at any moment, Mai's heart was utterly at ease. Without a trace of fear, she wrapped her arms around Ren's neck and slowly closed her eyes.
Ren lowered his head, fulfilling Mai's request with more tenderness and care than before, guiding and comforting her.
"~~"
The bliss of their kiss and the intertwining of their souls filled the void in Mai's heart. She felt her true self so vividly—no longer perfect, she shamelessly sought kisses with her friend's lover under the open sky.
Shedding all her burdens, the vulnerable Mai emptied her mind and immersed herself completely. It was a delicious, seductive poison, yet she willingly drank it to the last drop.
"Not enough, far from enough~"
After a long while, their lips parted as Ren released her, but Mai, with dazed eyes, pulled his head down. Clinging to him as if he were her only lifeline, she sought from him the authenticity and happiness she had never experienced in all her years.