"Damn it…"
A faint spark flickered in Si-Hun's palm before fading into nothing.
The feral in front of him tilted its head, unimpressed. A low-ranking monster. Weak. One strike was all it would take.
Si-Hun tried again.
Nothing.
His breath hitched. Sweat slid down his temple despite the cool air inside the gate.
Why… why won't it work?
Before he could force more mana..
Splash.
The feral collapsed, its body splitting open as another hunter's attack tore through it effortlessly.
Si-Hun flinched.
"Come on, man," the hunter scoffed. "At least put in some effort."
Effort.
The word struck deeper than the blow that killed the monster.
Si-Hun's fingers curled into his palm. He had tried. Again and again. Nights of practice, countless failures, all to stand here and still be useless.
"Thanks," he muttered.
The hunter didn't even turn back.
Laughter filled the clearing as the gate began to destabilize. Hunters chatted, comparing kill counts, bragging, already reliving the fight like a victory worth remembering.
Si-Hun stood there, alone.
This feeling wasn't new to him. But today, it felt heavier.
Guess this is all I am.
Rain greeted him the moment he stepped outside.
Cold droplets soaked through his clothes, clinging to his thin frame. Thunder cracked above, lightning tearing through the sky in violent flashes.
Each strike felt personal.
As if the sky itself despised him, yet stirred something restless deep inside his chest.
"Great," he muttered.
Halfway home, distracted and exhausted, his foot slipped.
Splash.
Mud flooded his shoe.
"Why don't these idiots ever close the gutters properly?!" he snapped.
A few heads turned.
Si-Hun froze, then lowered his gaze, heat creeping up his neck. He pulled his foot free and continued walking, slower now, each step heavy. Mud squelched with every movement, a disgusting reminder of the day he wished he could erase.
Rain blurred the city lights ahead of him. Seoul was alive, crowded, loud, moving forward.
And he was falling behind.
He reached home soaked and exhausted, but didn't bother changing. He stepped onto the balcony, rain dripping from his hair, the city stretching endlessly below.
"I'm not useless…" he whispered.
His voice cracked.
"I can do something. I will do something."
The words felt hollow even as he said them.
He wasn't changing for himself. Not really.
He wanted to prove something—to them, to the world, to anyone who ever looked at him with pity or contempt. He wanted to be seen. To matter.
Others called him weak. Pathetic. Useless.
Maybe not to his face.
But he knew.
Si-Hun was twenty-two years old. Still living at home. Still chasing strength that never seemed to answer him.
His parents ran a small grocery store. Business had been bad for a while.
He knew that they were struggling; he was too. One night, his father came to his room with a serious expression and said to him.
"I want to talk with you."
Si-Hun straightened up.
"Yes, Dad."
"Si-Hun, you know how business is not going well, and it is hard to cover all of our expenses and to feed everybody in the house; we don't have that much money. It's time you get a job and cover your expenses yourself. You've graduated from high school now, and college will take too long. I'm sorry, but you need to get up on your feet and not be a freeloader around the house."
Si-Hun looked at his father's serious face, overwhelmed by the sudden words.
He never really had a fatherly bond with his father, so it was hard for him to explain something to him; his father never truly understood him, as if he were talking to a rock.
"But I want to continue my education, only then I could have a nice job, how can I cover my expenses on my-
Si-Hun was cut off by his father's fierce voice.
"Young man, you need to learn how to live on your own, you're a grown ass man!, You heard me, I won't pay your expenses for you, you'll need to do it yourself, give your university dropout application tomorrow."
"Okay, Dad," he said bluntly and looked down.
He wanted to tear up, let his emotions out, say to his father that he does not want to do all this, he wants to live his life freely, not with all the pressure he was under, just like everyone else around him did, but fate had other plans.
"Good, just as I wanted you to respond." His father said, pleased.
And then he walked out, leaving Si-Hun staring at the floor like it would fix everything. His knees felt weak, and they gave up on himself. He collapsed and let his warm tears slide down his cheeks.
He was alone in this endless Universe... but you never know what life can be.