The girl sat at the table, playing with the empty instant noodle bowl and fork. Her helmet was off, and a deep blue cascade of long hair spilled over her shoulders, like a dark waterfall.
Kosma had already gone back. In the end, he hadn't answered the question.
The girl wasn't truly looking for an answer from him. Everyone's ideology was different, leading to different cognitions, and thus completely different answers. If one seeks the answer to a question that determines one's own values from the mouths of others, one will only end up imitating others clumsily.
She simply wanted to see what kind of people existed besides Lin, and that question was a clever shortcut to gauge her final opinion of a person.
"...What exactly did you want to say back then?"
"In the end, even though we got married, I still don't know."
The girl murmured something under her breath, but no one heard it, and even she herself didn't catch it clearly.
...
The man hated funerals.
Ever since he could remember, he deeply disliked attending funerals.
He didn't know if this world had a consciousness, but every funeral he attended was accompanied by rain.
The clouds were thick, the sky was heavy. The strong wind couldn't penetrate the cloud layer, nor the gloom in his heart.
When his parents died, he was not as tall as their gravestones. When his grandmother died, he was barely a head taller than the gravestone.
Afterward, no matter how unwilling, he attended many funerals, such as the funerals of his students, and some of the veterans who joined Falling Star at the same time as him. But most of them had no remains, as the persistent influence of Honkai energy meant that either there were no remains, or... the remains had turned into monsters.
However, he was no longer so resistant to funerals. Many people regarded funerals as the final memorial service for a person; the tears shed would accompany the soul of the deceased as they left. But he couldn't cry. When it rained then, he simply pretended he had cried.
Tears, he believed, should be used up at birth.
However, preparing a funeral for his wife—this was the first time.
"...Is it alright not to go to work? There must be many things left undone," the pink-haired girl sat in the colorless room, smiling at the silent man.
"It's alright, they can understand." The man shook his dazed head. After his body was completely replaced with Soulium, physical abnormalities no longer occurred, yet his mind was still bewildered. "There's still plenty of time."
"Heh heh... Actually, at this moment, I feel very sorry for you," the pink-haired girl's smile hadn't changed at all due to her illness, filled with the warmth of morning sunlight. "In the end, we have to part after only a few years of marriage..."
"..."
She couldn't survive by replacing her flesh with Soulium.
Even if the man could override all opposition and use the scarce Soulium for the girl's treatment, she wouldn't be able to withstand the stress and after-effects of the surgery. Not everyone was qualified to survive like the man... No, apart from him, no one had succeeded so far.
"Speaking of which, I actually always wanted a child..."
"Don't say it."
The man clenched his fists. He couldn't control his facial expressions. Why was this damn Soulium so difficult to control!
A child? This couple had never engaged in any conjugal activities from the moment they met until now, because he was transformed into his current state the day after they got married.
What should he do now? Believe a miracle would happen?
Believe the girl was a special exception, that she had a serum against Honkai energy in her body, and would be immune to Honkai energy erosion at the last minute?
Or should he invest all resources now into researching the Honkai energy serum, which was still a complete mystery, and complete it before the girl's life ended?
He could do nothing.
He could only sit here and quietly wait for the girl's death.
Even the embrace he offered the girl was only cold.
"Did I... make a mistake..."
The man, for the first time, doubted whether his path was wrong.
Since joining Falling Star, those companions who were once full of vigor, wanting to save humanity, had died. Those kind students who dreamed of the future had died. Yet, he could only survive again and again, until the arrival of this final straw.
"Don't~ talk~ nonsense~"
The girl's drawn-out ending sound dragged him back to reality. He rarely saw the girl looking annoyed, puffing out her cheeks and staring at him, as if saying, Don't talk nonsense or I'll get angry.
"After all this, I won't lecture you on believing in yourself. Lin, are you doubting the past created by humanity? You accepted imperfect humanity, and that is precisely why you plan to strive to be their miracle, isn't it?" The girl's solemn expression, in the dusk light, was sacred and pure. "Remember, even if I die, don't lose your way."
"...Even if you say that." The man looked up, shaking his head with a bitter smile. "I can't be sure about myself in the future..."
"You won't. Because you are my husband."
"..."
"My husband, no matter how much he fears being unable to shoulder the heavy responsibility, still walks ahead of everyone. He has been lost, fearful, and fallen, but in the end, he never forgot his true heart."
The girl clutched her breathless chest, straining to smile: "He is my miracle. He is humanity's miracle."
The man hated funerals.
Now, he hated them more than ever.
"Dringg—"
The communicator and the alarm sounded simultaneously. The man trembled uncontrollably at this moment. His Soulium body, which had no physiological phenomena, was shaking uncontrollably, and his entire heart was rapidly contracting with fear.
No...
"Lin."
Not at a time like this.
"Pick it up."
Please, have mercy. At least in this final moment, let me...
"Fiancé boy, don't run away now."
At least let her...
Numbly, the man pressed the answer button.
"Dr. Lin, the Ninth Honkai Eruption has begun."
"..."
"..."
"..."
"...I understand."
The hung-up dial tone was drawn out.
The man listened to the growing noise outside the room. He felt everything was moving away from him.
He wished he could just ignore everything and stay here with her until the end of human history.
But the girl was right.
She had told the truth every time. This time was no exception.
One fool, no matter how afraid he was, would still walk ahead of everyone.
"...I have to go."
"Mhm, have a safe trip."
A lonely figure left the room.
One week later, he returned here.
And the girl had fallen asleep in the light.