In his past life, at the Po Jun Manor.
"Lord Governor, this is the intelligence from the Heavenly Secrets Institute regarding the Western Buddha Sect Nation. Please review it."
"General Bai Qi, you have worked hard."
"Lord Governor, you are too kind. It is my lifelong fortune, Bai Qi's, to be able to follow you in battle on the battlefield."
"Mm, you may withdraw first..."
"This subordinate takes his leave."
Shen Zhao picked up the intelligence report and began to examine it carefully.
It had been nearly two years since the great battle at the Nine Netherworld Yellow Springs Pass.
The war had just ended, and now, they had uncovered the Western Buddha Sect Nation's conspiracy.
After reading the intelligence, Shen Zhao frowned. "It seems I need to go to the Western Regions personally. I can't let our brothers die in vain anymore. First, I'll go to the Sacred Phoenix Ruins to investigate the whereabouts of the Kunlun Mirror."
Suddenly, a gentle breeze swept through the door, carrying a faint, elegant fragrance.
Turning around, he saw Yu Xiyan, her eyes hazy, cheeks flushed, holding a jug of wine, leaning against the doorframe and looking at him with a half-smile.
"Greetings, Your Majesty!"
Shen Zhao immediately knelt on one knee, his face expressionless as he saluted Yu Xiyan.
Yu Xiyan stared blankly at Shen Zhao for a moment, then stumbled into the room.
A fragrant aroma of spirit wine permeated the room, causing Shen Zhao to furrow his brow.
It wasn't until Yu Xiyan, holding a high-grade spirit flower wine, leaned against the side of the bed that she beckoned Shen Zhao with a finger: "Come here, sit beside Me."
Shen Zhao rose and walked to Yu Xiyan's side, but did not sit down.
Yu Xiyan directly poured a mouthful of wine into her mouth, then offered it to Shen Zhao: "You drink too."
Shen Zhao lowered his head: "Your Majesty, you should be aware that this subject never drinks alcohol while on duty."
"What? Even you won't listen to Me?"
"This..."
"Will you drink it or not?"
"This subject obeys."
Shen Zhao took the wine but didn't drink it.
Yu Xiyan chuckled softly and said, "Tell me, I treat him so well, but why does he treat me like this?
I believe I've given him everything, but why does he still treat me so poorly?"
That "he," who else could it be but Lin Feng?
Shen Zhao's expression was calm, but he shook his head almost imperceptibly: "Your Majesty, you are drunk. This subject will have someone prepare the carriage to take you back to the palace."
In fact, at this moment, with Shen Zhao's unwavering support, Yu Xiyan had already stepped into the Great Emperor realm. As long as she didn't want to get drunk, this mere Spirit Flower Wine would be like a beverage, and it would be impossible for her to get drunk.
But she really couldn't accept Lin Feng's betrayal, considering that she had given him her heart, and he had turned around and slept with another woman.
This left Yu Xiyan feeling incredibly frustrated, so she didn't use her cultivation to numb herself and instead let the alcohol do the work, arriving at the Po Jun Manor in a daze.
In truth, the relationship between Yu Xiyan and Shen Zhao was already strained. After the battle at the Nine Netherworld Yellow Springs Pass, Shen Zhao hadn't returned to the Separate Residence Courtyard – his only residence in the palace.
He didn't even stay in the palace for longer than the time it took to drink a cup of tea, except when he had to attend court.
Why?
Because he was tired of it.
The battle at the Nine Netherworld Yellow Springs Pass had made Shen Zhao completely lose all hope regarding Yu Xiyan.
But this time, Yu Xiyan had taken the initiative to seek out Shen Zhao for the first time, and yet she spoke to her nominal husband about her past love life with another man, clearly not caring about Shen Zhao's feelings at all.
However, Shen Zhao had long since become numb, even accustomed to it. He simply listened to Yu Xiyan's complaints in silence, as if he were an outsider listening to someone else's love story, with no emotional reaction whatsoever.
After a long while, Yu Xiyan got up and suddenly embraced Shen Zhao, sobbing in his arms.
"Why, why does he have to do this to me? Tell me, why?"
Shen Zhao couldn't possibly give her an answer to that question.
After all, how could he understand the logic of a good-for-nothing?
Feeling the warmth of her embrace, the fleeting moment of his heart's flutter vanished with Yu Xiyan's unrestrained words.
Suddenly, Yu Xiyan pulled Shen Zhao to the edge of the bed and pinned him down, her captivating phoenix eyes fixed on him with a determined look.
This caused the flutter he had just suppressed to rise again.
"Xiao Feng, why are you doing this to me?"
"What exactly am I lacking compared to her?"
"I can give you everything she can!"
"I said I would give you my first time intact. No one can take that away. I will keep my promise."
"Tonight, I will give myself to you completely. I can give you everything Yang Rongrong can. Take me!"
After saying that, Yu Xiyan began to unbutton her clothes.
Those words were like a bucket of icy water, instantly sobering Shen Zhao.
"Your Majesty, please behave yourself!"
Without another word, Shen Zhao pushed Yu Xiyan aside, quickly got up, and walked towards the door.
"Xiao Feng, why did you do this to me!"
Yu Xiyan murmured to herself, then gradually fell asleep in a daze.
Shen Zhao felt a surge of nausea in his stomach. Even though he already knew this woman didn't love him, he still felt an unprecedented pang of heartache at this moment.
Finally, he sighed softly, turned, and stepped out of the house, disappearing into the endless night.
Yu Xiyan had originally forgotten this memory, but now, after Shen Zhao's reminder, she immediately panicked.
Instantly, remorse, regret, and fear, various emotions spread in her heart, and her eyes darted away from Shen Zhao.
"Do you remember?"
Shen Zhao asked with a blank expression.
"In front of her own husband, calling out another man's name, do you think any man could endure such a disgusting betrayal?"
Yu Xiyan took a few steps back, and after a long while, she shook her head and explained, "No, Shen Zhao, listen to me, let me explain. It's not what you think. Actually, that night I..."
In fact, she wanted to say that she wasn't drunk at all that night. She knew the person standing in front of her was Shen Zhao. She really wanted to be with him and completely forget Lin Feng.
But the emperor's arrogance and unusual behavior and words made her hurt the man she had relied on for twenty years once again.
Why was it like this?
"Heh..." Shen Zhao sneered, "The facts are right in front of us, what else are you trying to argue?
Enough, Yu Xiyan, I don't want to bring up the past. Since we've been reborn once, let's each live our own lives, and it's best if we never have anything to do with each other again!"
Yu Xiyan's clear tears slowly fell from her cheeks, and she looked up and asked, "You really don't like me anymore? Shen Zhao?"
"How do you expect me to like you?" Shen Zhao retorted. "My wife torments her husband again and again for another man,
even moaning another man's name in bed, and has remained chaste for that man for more than a decade. How can you still have the face to ask such a stupid question?"
Yu Xiyan shook her head repeatedly: "Shen Zhao, it's not like that. Can you listen to my explanation?
That night, I did indeed mistake you for Lin Feng, but if I really didn't care about you, why would I have gone to the Po Jun Manor to find you?
That night, I was already clear-headed the moment you pushed me onto the bed. I knew it was you.
I had already planned to give myself to you, and to become a real couple from then on, but you didn't touch me in the end."
"You came looking for me only because Lin Feng betrayed you! Don't use such ridiculous excuses to fool me.
I'm not a fool, and I'm not a substitute for trash like Lin Feng. It's really fucking disgusting."
"No, that's not it. You're not anyone's substitute, really, I've never thought of you that way!"
"Don't lie to yourself, okay?" Shen Zhao said, word by word, "The things you've done to hurt me aren't just these. If I were to list them one by one,
it would take three days and three nights to finish. So, can we please not have so many entanglements in this lifetime? I'm really scared of you. Can we let each other go?
I've already done as you said and won't be together with you in this lifetime, and I've taken the initiative to stay away from you. What more do you want? Do you want to force me to death again to be satisfied?"
"Shen Zhao, can you love me boldly one more time? In this life, no one can stop us anymore. Lin Feng has already been ruined, we can definitely be happy..."
"Do you think our problems were just because of Lin Feng? Then before Lin Feng appeared, how did you treat me?"
Since he was going to talk about it, Shen Zhao might as well make all the issues clear at once, or he would definitely be driven crazy.
"I asked myself, I haven't done anything to let you down, or to let down the Yin Tian Immortal Dynasty,
"I've been working so hard to play the role of a husband, really, I've really tried my best."
"I heard you were exhausted from dealing with state affairs, so I secretly planted a Jade Night Begonia Tree for you,
I wanted to give you a surprise on our wedding day. It can help calm your mind and also enhance your comprehension of the Great Dao."
"You said you liked the Mystic Robe made of Water Spirit Silk for casual wear, as it could improve your cultivation progress,
So I personally went to the Southern Border Water Tribe, risking being blown up by Gu Poison without even flinching, and successfully obtained the Water Spirit Silkworm Silk for you. I also asked the Weaver Maiden's Holy Hand to make the Mystic Robe and personally delivered it to you."
"You said your combat skills were too limited and couldn't cope with future battles,
So, risking being devoured by three thousand magical beasts, I braved the Beast Mountain Range alone, fought my way through the deep valley, and brought back the Sword Sect's ten-thousand-year heritage to offer to you."
"You said that the Heavenly Severing Sacred Land and other sects were disrespectful to you, so I didn't hesitate and directly led the army to destroy the Heavenly Severing Sacred Land, even at the cost of becoming enemies with the Profound Heaven Immortal Dynasty."
"You said..."
Recalling everything, one event after another, Yu Xiyan finally deeply understood the price and the ordeals that Shen Zhao had endured for her. It was far more than she had imagined.
"In short, whatever you asked of me, Shen Zhao, whether I was capable or not, I never refused.
I always gave it my all to satisfy you. I ask you, wouldn't you say that what I've done makes me a qualified husband, no matter where you look at it?
After all, a husband should do everything he can to get what his wife wants. It's only natural, isn't it?"
"So, I ask myself, I haven't done anything to let you down. I never expected you to repay me, either.
But, no matter what, you shouldn't be using my things while treating me like a plague."
"But what did you say to Lin Feng? Do you remember?"
If that useless waste hadn't come swaggering over to show off a Sound Recording Stone,
I wouldn't have known that I was so utterly pathetic and laughable in your eyes!"
"Tell Lin Feng that you feel as though you're as filthy as a courtesan in a brothel.
Every time you accept something from me, it's as if you're trying to please a john, making you feel disgusted.
Every time I fulfill your demands, it only makes you hate yourself more.
You hate your own incompetence, you loathe my smug expression when I give things to you,
and you despise yourself for being so base, for disgracing the imperial family!"
"Is that really how you see me? The irony is that these are things you wanted. I risk my life to get them for you, and yet I'm the one at fault?
"Why can you accept everything so calmly, yet you treat my efforts so poorly?
Yu Xiyan, ask yourself, is this fair to me?"
"I know, from the very beginning you didn't like me, and I know this marriage wasn't what you wanted.
After all, my humble background could never match your lofty, peerless beauty as the Empress.
If it weren't for the insistence of your father and mother, we wouldn't have ended up together.
But I truly used all my understanding, all my heart and soul, to try and change myself.
I desperately tried to accommodate you, but you didn't even give me the most basic trust and respect.
Now you ask me if I still love you? Do you think I dare to love you anymore? Don't you think this question is extremely foolish, extremely laughable?"
"I still can't understand what I did wrong, what exactly are you not satisfied with! To the point that you despise me so much? Even to the point of wanting to take my life!"
"You think I coveted your imperial throne? That I murdered your kin? To be honest, if I truly had such intentions, the Yin Tian Immortal Dynasty would never have reached such heights!"
"And what did my sincere efforts earn me?
The entire Immortal Martial Continent is laughing at me, saying I'm just a dog for Empress Yu Xiyan.
But even if I were a dog, wouldn't wagging my tail earn me a little bit of my master's affection, right?
So, what have I gained? Besides your coldness, ruthlessness, disgust, and hatred, what else? I'm worse than a dog!
Answer me, Yu Xiyan, everything I risked my life for, for the empire, what did it ultimately get me?
As the saying goes, the imperial family is the most heartless, but I believe that even a worldly emperor, when facing a useful person, no matter how displeased, would still put on a show of affection, right?"
But you don't even bother to act!
Even if you loathe me to the extreme, you shouldn't involve the soldiers of the Po Jun Manor who fought for the Great Yin!
Over all these years, how many great achievements has Po Jun Manor made for the Great Yin? Don't you know?
Yet, have you ever held a victory celebration for them, reviewed their military might, or even comforted the families of the fallen heroes?
Do you think those cold gold and silver are what the soldiers want?
You're wrong. What they want is the personal recognition of the Great Yin's Empress, the glory and dignity that belongs to soldiers!
Just because of your inexplicable hatred towards me, you haven't even acknowledged these honors that should have been theirs.
Who are they? The army of the Great Yin! For the Great Yin Empire, for the people of the Great Yin, for you! Empress Yu Xiyan! They willingly die on the battlefield!
"You shouldn't impose your prejudice against me on these soldiers who risked their lives. Do you know how many hearts you've broken by doing this?"
Yu Xiyan was left speechless by the shock.
Every single thing Shen Zhao said was a true experience, without any exaggeration.
Yet, she had taken Shen Zhao's sacrifices for granted, all while relentlessly belittling and slandering him behind his back.
Unknowingly, she had hurt such a good man so deeply.
It turned out he wasn't unaware of the pain; he had simply chosen to endure it, bearing all the hurt she inflicted upon him, until it finally crushed him completely.
"I'm sorry, I'm truly sorry. I didn't know I hurt you so deeply.
But Shen Zhao, I really, truly beg you, give me a chance to make amends, okay?"
"I'll treat you well in this life! I really won't hurt you again."
"I'm sorry, I never needed your compensation." Shen Zhao took a deep breath. "I only ask that we put an end to this absurd, wrong relationship.
In fact, Lin Feng was right about one thing; we were never meant to be together. Staying together only brings mutual torment.
In this life, you be your Yin Tian Immortal Dynasty's empress, and I'll be my wandering swordsman. We'll live separate lives, like strangers!
You finally have the right to pursue happiness, and no one will stop you anymore. I just hope that the person who spends the rest of their life with you will never be me!"
"No, I don't want that!" Yu Xiyan shook her head repeatedly. "Shen Zhao, I know you hate me, and I don't expect you to forgive me immediately.
I only ask that you trust me one more time, just once. I promise I won't hurt you again. I'll make up for it tenfold, a hundredfold, a thousandfold. Please, don't reject me, okay?
I'm really scared when you're like this, I'm really scared. You never used to talk to me like this before,"
"Come back to me, okay? I'll fulfill my duties as a wife, give you the tenderness you deserve, and I won't let you suffer any more."
If it were before, Shen Zhao's heart would have melted the moment he saw Yu Xiyan's pitiful appearance.
But Shen Zhao now found it all incredibly ironic, even disgusting.
He didn't want to know why Yu Xiyan had become like this in her rebirth. He might have been interested before, but now…
It didn't matter.
"Yu Xiyan, remember this: you can hurt me again and again, manipulate me as you please, all because I once truly loved you.
Only by truly loving someone do you give them the power to hurt you.
But if this love disappears, what do you think you can use to restrain me!"
"Since we're both back, let's just live our own lives. You are the ruler of Great Yin, and you have many things to deal with. Don't waste your time here.
As your nominal husband, I can give you one last piece of advice: Accepting the help of others doesn't mean you're incompetent."
Accepting kindness reasonably requires knowing how to reciprocate. This is the premise of mutual trust.
I'll leave it at that. May we never have any further dealings in this life. Take care, and farewell."
Shen Zhao turned and left without looking back.
"Shen Zhao! Don't go! I'm telling you, I won't agree to let you go. You're my husband, and you will be for life!"
Yu Xiyan grabbed Shen Zhao's wrist, trying to salvage everything she was about to lose.
"Let go!"
Shen Zhao barked, shaking off Yu Xiyan's hand without a trace of hesitation.
At the same time, a silver-gray bracelet that had been on his wrist fell to the ground, but he didn't even bother to glance at it and simply walked away.
"This life, I will prove my love for you with my actions!"
"You must wait for me. I will make you willingly return to my side!"
"Please don't abandon me, Shen Zhao, husband! Please don't leave me! I was wrong, I really know I was wrong!"
Yu Xiyan clutched the bracelet tightly, shouting at Shen Zhao's back, tears instantly soaking her delicate cheeks.
Unfortunately, Shen Zhao didn't even have the desire to stop, and soon disappeared from Yu Xiyan's sight.
-----------------------
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