I sat on the couch after turning off the behind-the-scenes video on my phone.
The television was still playing. A chef demonstrated how to julienne carrots, his knife producing one impossibly neat strip after another.
I wasn't watching.
I'd spent the day calculating things I didn't want to calculate. How long our savings would last. Whether Lumo Entertainment would take me back. How I was supposed to tell the others I'd wasted their time believing I belonged beside them.
I closed my eyes, intending to rest for a minute.
When I slept, there were no rehearsal rooms, no rankings, no unfinished melodies. Just darkness without anything expected of me.
Something woke me: the soft click of our front door.
I opened my eyes. The television volume had been lowered, and a blanket covered my legs. My neck ached against the armrest.
Soojin was setting her schoolbag on the kitchen table. She looked over when I moved.
"Sorry," I mumbled. "I fell asleep."
