Faced with Agnes Tachyon's mysterious statement, Shinji was silent for a moment, then pushed her away and said helplessly, "Ah, right, right. I already know you like me a lot, but let's talk about whatever it is in half an hour..."
"Mr. Guinea Pig, I know what you're worried about, but it's all okay."
She looked at him seriously, the cold rationality and fervent emotion in her mind intertwining, making her thoughts unprecedentedly agile.
"If you want, I can tell you right now where all my hidden potions are, including the list of potion formulas I currently have, and my computer and all sorts of accounts and passwords can also be told to you..."
"My weaknesses, my vulnerabilities, and some unspeakable secrets. With these, even if I return to normal, I will still have to obediently listen to you, Mr. Guinea Pig..."
"And you don't have to worry about me asking others for help. You just have to say that I forced you to do it after a lab accident. Neither the Chairwoman nor the President would possibly doubt your words, because..."
Flick—
A sharp flick on the forehead interrupted her words.
She held her head, looking at him with teary eyes, while his face was covered in black lines.
"What the hell is in your head? And is my image in your heart that terrible?"
"...No."
She lowered her head and said in a wronged voice, "But, I really don't want to be disliked by you, Mr. Guinea Pig, and I don't want to lose you."
He frowned. "When did I say I disliked you? And what do you mean by lose? Am I going to die soon?"
"You don't have to comfort me, Mr. Guinea Pig. I know."
She lowered her head, her tone low.
"Selfish, willful, a pile of trouble, and my results aren't even good..."
"Even though I can't even take care of myself without someone's help, I always act so arrogant..."
"Not to mention the others in the team are so good, obedient, well-behaved, sensible, talented, and less trouble. They can even take care of you in return, so it's very normal for you not to like me. I can understand..."
He was shocked.
He had originally thought this was just her acting pitiful to trick him into staying with her.
But now it seemed that this thing might, probably, possibly... be her true feelings?
Realizing this, he was silent for a few seconds, then nodded frankly. "Well, that's true. you are indeed quite troublesome."
Her head lowered even further.
But before she could get any more down, he spoke again.
"But everyone has their own way of living. I wouldn't dislike you just for this. After all, if I couldn't even stand this much trouble, I would have long since been unable to stand Eclipse."
Hearing this, she was taken aback for a moment. "What's so troublesome about Miss Eclipse? Isn't her personality very good?"
"That's because you're seeing her now. In the past..."
Recalling the scene of their first meeting, his eyelids twitched.
"I can't really describe it to you, but anyway, she was much more troublesome than you, and not just by a little bit—but don't you see me still putting up with her now?"
"And besides, it's not just Eclipse. I've encountered more than one or two troublesome people in the past."
"Like an old lady who has nothing better to do than to stir up trouble all day, an old lady who is busy as hell but still has to find time to come over and beat me up, a clumsy idiot who can't do anything right, a self-pitying idiot who can do things well but just complains all day..."
"And you don't think the others in the team aren't strange? You know about Agnes Digital, and you know about the appetites of Special Week and Oguri Cap."
"And the others basically have their own strange points and troubles. Their fighting spirit and endurance are even more amazing... I mean, you don't know them well enough yet, so you don't know the problems with them..."
"And as for Eclipse... the main thing is I really don't know how to tell you now, but trust me, her troublesome level in the past was absolutely beyond your imagination. It's just that she looks fine now. In the past..."
His expression was extremely rich when he was speaking, especially when he was talking about Eclipse. The struggle on his face and in his eyes did not look like it was faked at all, which made her look at him with a stunned expression.
Really? Miss Eclipse was that terrifying before?
And just as she was stunned, he turned his head, looked directly into her eyes, and said seriously, "So, I've put up with so many troublesome horse girls. One more like you won't make a difference. So you don't have to worry about me disliking you because of this, let alone kicking you out of the team—although you are indeed quite troublesome."
"After all, as your trainer, bearing your trouble is also one of my duties. As long as you don't do anything out of line, I can just treat it as you're fooling around. But if you fool around too much... I'll go find Miss Tazuna."
"Ah, there's no need for that."
She answered reflexively.
No way. The one she was most afraid of in the entire academy was undoubtedly that Green Hat Devil.
Her whereabouts were mysterious, her strength was unfathomable, and because she often caused trouble and increased her workload, her resentment towards her was quite great.
Whenever she had a chance, she would come over to raid and confiscate her various contraband items. And every time after her incidents ended, she would also come over, close the door with a smile, and then a pig-like scream would be heard from inside...
And after this joke-like little interlude, the atmosphere in the room immediately relaxed a lot, and she also returned to her normal state.
—The "normal" here refers to the state before he was about to leave.
But although she had returned to her previous state, and as time went on, the side effects of the potion showed some signs of fading, for some reason, certain emotions in her heart became even stronger than before...
And more real.
Mr. Guinea Pig, so you don't hate me...
She blinked and smiled again.
"But even so, I'm still very troublesome, right?"
"What else?" He shot her a sidelong glance. "If I say you're worry-free, obedient, well-behaved, sensible, and that I like you very much, would you believe me?"
She thought seriously for a moment, and then gave her evaluation. "That sounds disgusting."
"Then that's that."
He spread his hands, thinking to himself that now he should be able to get through the remaining time peacefully.
But before he could be happy for a few seconds, her voice sounded again.
"Then, Mr. Guinea Pig, have you ever thought that you could turn me into the kind of not-so-troublesome person you want?"
As she spoke, her face got closer to him, her red pupils shining with seriousness.
"As long as you do what I said just now and make me yours, you can easily control me. And not just my actions, even my mind can be managed with the help of potions..."
"And, I've caused you so much trouble usually. Don't you want to punish this 'bad child' a little? And after the punishment is over, you can also use those things to teach me bit by bit and turn me into the kind of 'good child' you want..."
This time, he was no longer flustered and just shot her a calm sidelong glance.
"You've asked me before if I can do math. And now I want to ask you the same question."
"...Huh?" she was taken aback.
"As you said, you tell me all your weaknesses and vulnerabilities, and let me use them to threaten you—but what then?"
As he spoke, he extended his hand and began to count on his fingers for her.
"I don't believe you would be obedient. At that time, there would definitely be resistance, and I would have to fight a battle of wits with you every day, calculating this and that, having to guard against you doing this and that, having to make regular plans, having to watch you all day to prevent you from mixing potions to trick me, and also having to find a way to hide it from the academy..."
"And look at me now. I clock in for work and slack off after clocking out. Besides the necessary work, I can do whatever I want. If I really do as you say, then I would just be adding a bunch of trouble for no reason, destroying the beautiful life I have now, which would be counterproductive..."
After rambling on for about a minute, he stopped his analysis and then looked at her.
"So you see, this is purely a losing business for me. On the contrary, if you can become a 'good child,' then the ultimate beneficiary is still you—so why should I do that?"
Her smile gradually became complicated.
Although she felt that what he said seemed to have no problem, why did a surge of anger rise in her heart...
"Ah, right." He spoke again. "By the way, if you're willing, you can tell me now where you usually hide your potions. That way it'll be more convenient to search you before we go out."
If it were just now, she would definitely have said it, but now...
"No."
She refused his request with a smile.
And seeing her refuse, he was not surprised at all and shrugged.
That's what he thought. Even if her affection was so high, this woman couldn't possibly really do what she had said just now. She was most likely joking with him.
If he had agreed, or even just shown a slight intention, she would probably have immediately taken out a voice recorder or a pinhole camera and said with a smile, "Mr. Guinea Pig, you wouldn't want this thing to be seen by others, would you?".
However, even so, he didn't doubt what she had said about pleasure turning into affection. After all, even if what she had said just now were all jokes, the scale of the jokes was a bit too much. And her previous behavior was indeed not something she could do in her normal state.
It's just that the conversion rate seemed a bit low. He had used fifty percent of his strength, but in the end, it still couldn't overcome her desire to drug him...
Wait a minute, thinking about it this way, how persistent is she about drugging him!
And just as he was thinking this, she on the side moved again.
A few seconds after refusing, she looked at his helpless face and suddenly had the thought of continuing to tease him.
Changing direction, she unfolded her body, and then put her legs in his lap, her small toes moving restlessly, with a hint of seductive playfulness.
His eyelids twitched. "What are you trying to do now?"
"Continue the nursing care."
She was frank. "Otherwise, when the effect of the medicine wears off later, I probably won't be able to take it, so it's better to finish it now, right?"
"But that side effect isn't..."
"I like you, Mr. Guinea Pig."
She stared at him, the line between the fake and the real in her heart already blurred. "Right now, besides liking you, I don't want to think about anything else."
"So, since it's already at this point, no matter how bad it gets, how much worse can it get?"
Bullshit, you were clearly thinking about drugging me just now!
He complained in his heart, and then refused her proposal.
What a joke. It's already like this now. Who knows if kneading her any more will cause some other change. What if, while kneading, he breaks through some kind of limit and really makes her feelings for him fixed? Then this matter would be really big.
She knew his concerns and didn't insist, but she also had no intention of moving her legs away.
Although he had said he didn't dislike her, she still wanted to show him the side he liked. Because after clarifying the feelings in her heart, what she wanted now was not just not to be disliked and abandoned.
"But, there's not much time left..." she murmured in a low voice.
More than thirty minutes had passed. She could clearly feel the falsely inflated love in her heart rapidly diminishing and fading, and the residual stimulation in various parts of her body also began to gradually become obvious.
And more importantly, after the effect of the potion disappeared, what would 'she' become?
She should just disappear, right?
After all, although 'she' was also Agnes Tachyon, she was more composed of that falsely inflated love. Once those false feelings turned to nothing, then she, who had lost her support, would of course also disappear with them.
This was very normal, and she had expected it.
But the problem is, no matter how much she had expected it, when she really personally felt the love fading and herself disappearing bit by bit, with the collapse of the false emotional support, feelings of unease and panic began to spread.
"What's wrong?"
He noticed her strangeness.
She did not answer, just pressed her lips together.
She was just a product born of an accident, and was built on false feelings. It was very normal, and even should be, for her to just disappear like this.
Rationality was reminding her that this was just the effect of the potion wearing off, and that she was returning to her normal process. But the unease and fear in her heart were still constantly growing.
Don't want to disappear, don't want to admit my falsehood, don't want to be separated from him...
Even though it's the current her who likes him more, even though it's the current her who is more to his liking, why is she fake, why must she disappear...
The rate of fading was getting faster and faster, and the line of defense of her rationality also began to collapse.
Her hands unconsciously clenched, her knuckles turning white. The smile on her face also disappeared, leaving only the most primitive fear from her biological instincts.
The excessive strangeness could no longer be hidden from his observation. Under his serious inquiry, and looking at the worry in his eyes, her body trembled slightly, and the last shred of rationality also disappeared. She began to忍不住 (rěnbuzhù - unable to bear/resist) describe the feelings in her heart to him, venting the fear in her heart bit by bit.
"I like you, Mr. Guinea Pig. I want to be with you. I don't want to disappear. Don't forget me..."
She lowered her head, not daring to let him see the ugliness that had been twisted out by her unease and fear. Because this might be her last, she didn't want to leave him with an ugly ending.
Fear, sobbing, teardrops.
But faced with this situation, he didn't know how to comfort her either. After all, as she had said, she was a product born of the side effects of a potion, the result of her spirit being distorted by an external force. Now it was just a matter of returning to normal. It was a good thing for both him and her.
But...
He reached out and hugged her, gently patting her back.
"Rest assured. You are Tachyon. You won't disappear. And I won't forget you—in fact, with your performance just now, I couldn't forget you even if I wanted to."
For an existence born from falsehood, falsehood itself is their reality.
She was fake, and her love was also fake. But for herself, this love was genuine.
He knew that this kind of behavior was a bit inappropriate, and he knew that it would be very awkward later when she returned to normal.
But he just wanted to do it.
Less than forty minutes is nothing in a person's lifetime. It might not even be enough for a nap. But for 'her', these forty minutes were 'her' entire life from birth to now, 'her' complete life.
So, although he was clear that she was just a fake existence, although he didn't love her in his heart, at this final moment, he wanted to give her a relatively gentle end.
She accepted it.
The false love in her heart faded even more rapidly, and large gaps began to appear. Her existence also began to collapse like a building that had lost its support.
But even so, with his comforting words, and feeling the warmth that surrounded her whole body, the fear of disappearing in her heart suddenly lessened, and even a trace of peace began to appear.
The false love had received a real response, and then she also had a real meaning of existence.
And, although she was disappearing, this was a fact.
But at the same time, with the disappearance of this fake existence of hers, some real things also began to grow with it.
The collapsed falsehood fell to the ground, and was then attracted by the real sprout, turning into its nutrient for growth, and soon evolved into a small trunk. It's just that perhaps because the nutrient was fake, this small trunk also looked a bit illusory.
But it didn't matter.
Although the false love in her heart had almost completely dissipated, and her own existence was already fragmented, in that warm embrace, she still held her head high with the support of something, and added the last piece to that illusory trunk.
"I like you, you know, Mr. Guinea Pig."
Although there were still undried tears on her face, she still tried her best to squeeze out a smile similar to her usual one.
Then, she put her arms around his neck and forcefully pulled him towards her.
"So, you can't forget me, okay?"
With words full of longing and reluctance, the last piece of false support also collapsed.
I really want to stay by your side, but I was originally a fake existence. Even if I stay, you probably won't accept it, right?
Then in that case, before I leave, please let me leave a little bit of reality, just as a final act of willfulness.
And so, 'she' held her head high.
In the next instant, with the complete collapse of the false love in her heart, she also completely dissipated.
Only the finally returned to normal Agnes Tachyon was left, looking at the face that was so close in front of her, feeling the warm touch on her lips.
Her mind was a blank.
-------
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