In the evening,
We ate our snakes and was lying on the sofa, watching a movie. I was thinking about the next matches and the opponents. I'm thinking about how we are getting it in a handy way. It is true that as a captain, I have some extra responsibilities to look over. I might be doing the job even after staying there with a silly condition. It is also true that if somebody asks me who was I there back then to look after him, I suppose I will repeat the question as my answer. There is no cure for regression. There is no healing process for concern.
"What are you thinking?" I jolted after hearing the sound from beside. "N-no, nothing." I didn't want him to ask further questions. I was not sure if I was going to answer it correctly. But I was lucky he didn't as he kept his attention up on the television. I slightly looked at him, holding my face straight, for making myself sure he actually let it go. After getting the confirmation, I took a breath. I was never sure why I thought each time that I would not lie to him if he asked some serious questions.
A few minutes later,
The movie has been finished. I wish it to finish soon. I did not like the movie much. But I did not tell him to change it. He was the one who chose it. How can I pick another over his choice? I am staying here with a view to healing him. I would obviously pick his priority first. No matter what he chose. "Huh! Exhausted!" He leaned on the couch, crossing his hands behind his head, holing his face up on the ceiling. I fetched the remote and turned the TV off. "How was that?" He asked me. "Ah! Good. It's hard to get the clue, but it was fine." I heard he chuckled. I put the remote in the table and looked at him. "What?" I asked. "Nothing. Actually, you know what -" He leaned off the couch and brought his head closer to my ear, I was feeling his respiration over my skin. "I can realise whenever you lie." I sensed the words inside my head. I forced a smile, taking is as a joke. Why was he talking like that?
"What do you mean?" I asked him, taking my head away, looking at him. I saw he smiled. "Nothing. I know that you did not like the movie. I was waiting to hear from you to pause it. But you didn't. I didn't like the movie either." He told me. I did not guess what he was trying to say. Abruptly, he changed the topic. He bends his eyesight and nodes the head aside, "Luka, my heart says that I might listen to yours. Huh! Maybe it could save a lot of my times -" I felt like he hadn't finished yet but stood up, fix his t-shirt. I knew the time of sleeping. I stood up, too. I faced him looking at me and opened his mouth to speak the unfinished line. "Maybe it can save ME, too." He smiled again. I guessed I looked some pain over his face, under the smile. "Good night." He told the last word before heading upstairs. I was paused there. Did not reply.
After lying down on the bed, I was thinking what he meant. He should listen to mine. Do I always give unnecessary suggestions? If so, then he doesn't have to mention it as necessary either. I do have the intention to help him get better. I can consider myself as a caretaker, who is nothing but giving company. I sighed to vanish the thoughts inside of me. Settled my eyes on the letter, had been received today. The address wasn't written on the letter. But I did open it and rotate my eyes over words to words. How offensive the lines were! How can someone write in that way? I fetched the letter and tucked it in a corner of a drawer so that nobody could find it. I could also burn it, but I felt hesitant then. Just because the letter belonged to his beloved person, I could not let the things to be happened in my hands. Just because he mentioned my choices would turn a betterment on him, I chose to hide it. It will put a betterment. My heart says.