We did it on Friday morning, 11 against 11, and I put Joel Ward on him.
Prrp.
Joel Ward is 28, he has 250 matches, and he will do exactly what he is told for 40 minutes without enjoying a second of it, which is the only kind of man you can use for this.
"6 feet. Hands behind your back. If he goes to the corner flag you go to the corner flag."
"And if the ball comes?"
"You do not care about the ball, Joel. You care about him."
It went badly twice.
The first time Neves took the walk and nobody went into the hole at all, because Pierre-Emile Højbjerg is 24 and has spent a year and a half being told by me to hold his position, and you do not undo that in 20 minutes on a Friday.
The second one was worse. Neves walked, the hole opened, Højbjerg went into it 2 seconds late, and by then the ball had gone to Tarkowski, who could not see any of it from where he was stood and put it long.
PRRP.
"Stop. Stop."
