Waking up still drugged and unable to bend accurately enough in order to filter the poison out of my system is rather upsetting. So is realising that you've been chained to a wall in a cold, wet and mostly dark cell. The only source of light is a flickering wax candle that seems like there might be an hour left to it. Somehow, this seems crueller than leaving me with no light at all from the very beginning.
This is not how I expected an old, ancient order of ancient men with codes of honour longer than their beards would treat someone seeking help, versed in the ways of Pai Sho. I mean…
This might have been a naïve assumption.
After everything went so well with the yakuza, which I now suspect had a lot to do with Gorou and my earlier show of force with Dionu, as well as their knowledge of my role during the invasion, I'd somehow assumed we'd be playing Pai Sho, drinking tea, talking about my plans and either I'd leave with help, or they'd refuse. Should I count this as a refusal?
If I get out of here early enough to not delay our plans for arriving at Ba Sing Se Harbour within the next two days, I resolve to steer clear from all members of the White Lotus until I can speak to Pakku. Perhaps they're not even members of the order. One small tile nailed to the sign of a shop in Tananga doesn't actually have to tell me anything.
I should've been more paranoid.
All around.
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(Gorou POV )
He's not back yet. Sunrise two hours come and gone, what is he doing?
Gorou looks over the docks, as he's been doing for the past hours. His intuition tells him that this isn't normal. Mai and Ty Lee are nervous as well. Haruto would be too, if he weren't still sleeping. Peter… the less said about the boy the better.
It's beyond irritating. He scowls.
Fon appears by his side. He's silent, as he always is because he knows that Gorou knows what he wants before he has to say it.
Gorou nods. He's going to search for Kaito. This whole Ba Sing Se operation hinges on Kaito and his knowledge of the city, the Fire Nation and the Dai Li. Also, Gorou wouldn't set foot in that city without someone who could watch his back. So far, the only one he thinks is qualified enough for going up against Dai Li agents and coming out on top is Kaito.
He turns to the stern, where Mai and Ty Lee are holding a hushed conversation. He supposes they're deciding whether or not to make a break for it, even though they're not prisoners. Sometimes the young women seem rather… silly. Then again, they're Fire Nation, and nobles to top it off. Gorou's never met a noble who wasn't silly.
They look up at his approach. "I'll look for him," Gorou says, speaking mostly to Mai, "I'd like you to come with me, show me where you went the day before yesterday that he might've returned to."
She frowns, but gives him a nod. Then she turns to her scowling companion, "Please look after Tom-Tom for me."
Ty Lee shrugs. "Fine."
Mai seems apologetic, but leaves it at that. Gorou, Fon and her leave the ship. The yakuza don't go back on their deals. Not unless they can be certain of the profit. In this, all profit comes from actually getting into Ba Sing Se, and exploiting the market there – the fear that no one talks about there. There's no need to guard the ship from those still on it.
"Before Dionu attacked us," Mai says on the docks, "He went into a tobacco shop. That's the only place I didn't enter with him. He seemed preoccupied after that, so I suggest we start our search there."
They follow. Tananga, by day, is something of a beggar's den. Only, everyone here is a criminal, so no one has anything to give. Beggars are cutthroats. No one here isn't dangerous. Gorou remembers thinking that this was the only place he could really be himself. There was no need to hide here, in the dusty streets with knives flashing in every alley. He learned later on that there was no need to ever not be himself. Only the need to sometimes have other people believe him to be something different.
Mai leads them to a tobacco shop, and Gorou is on his guard. This place is one of those that the yakuza have no jurisdiction over.
They'll have to be careful.
All of them enter. There are two men by a low Pai Sho table, smoking pipes.
Gorou knows better than to tell them what they're here for directly. But with these types, he knows lies would be out of place.
The decision of what to say is taken from him when one of them speaks.
"The boy has allies," the statement is cryptic, but it lets them know that Kaito was here. Is he still?
"Where is he?" Mai demands to know.
"Hmm," the man replies. "You will know in time. Now is the time to wait."
This is a trial, Gorou realises. Very different from his own, but a trial nonetheless.
...
The time alone in the dark gives me incentive to think. About the near future, should I escape here. Which I will. As soon as I can feel my limbs well enough to try and stand. As soon as I can bend myself lockpicks.
This reminds me of the last time I was chained up. In the bowels of a pirate ship. But I had been thrown straight into action, then , instead of having to keep checking whether I could bend egain or even move smoothly.
Ah… that seems so long ago now. It was only a few weeks ago that the girls and I were captured. That we took over a pirate vessel, lost Azula to her returning memory and basically got rid of lots of people.
And Gorou, the crafty snake went and chose the most direct course of securing his freedom.
Gorou is a terrifying person. He waits. Watches. Assesses. When he makes his move, it is with full awareness of the consequences and contingency plans of his opponents, as well as his own. Even so, he is a pirate. Which means that he does not possess any notion of morality. Not in the way I am currently attempting to exercise it. I wonder if he even perceives people as more than enactors of certain roles. If he does not, he is beyond terrifying. A man of ignorance and immorality.
Seems to be working for him, though.
After all, I know of this. And still I do not kill him. Still I give him the benefit of the doubt for my cause. He seems to like freedom and is far too used to getting beat up for a fighter of his calibre.
My pipe dream of a cause and its pathetic beginnings in the vestiges of a barricade against the Fire Nation are a bit too little for him to be trustworthy, though.
What am I thinking?
What am I doing?
I try bending a bit of the moisture around me. Nope.
Fine. Let's use the time efficiently. Let's reflect on my actions… I need a smoke. I'd like very much to pack the pipe that formerly belonged to the late captain. It was in the chest that I hadn't bothered to unlock before we arrived with the Southern Watertribe. Perhaps not the best way to avoid these thoughts in order to simply move on, but while my body is still young and has yet to finish developing, I have practised abstinence in my formative years whereas recent events lead me to believe that a slight addiction won't hurt.
Not if I am to come to terms with a semblance of fatherhood, the formation of the beginnings of a kind of rebel alliance against all forms of government that do not rely on the freedom and responsibility of their subjects, and the fact that I keep making matters worse for myself.
Namely. Gorou. I don't want to be constantly afraid. And yet, I have clasped his hand with mine.
I really want a smoke.
It is far more likely that I will die from exposure to this man, than any lung disease that I could get whilst being stuck in this cell or smoking. After all, I can monitor my health through bending, and take steps to heal any damage. Even without this reassurance, the odds of being the more likely cause of my death are stacked in Gorou's favour.
I imagine packing and lighting the pipe. Inhale. Slight burn, bitter taste, exhale with the calming sensation.
Life is neither simple, nor easy. Which is why I like knowing how I stand with a person horizontally as well as laterally. It creates less confusion. It simplifies interactions.
I cannot walk through life without taking the time to think other people's motivations and actions through. If I didn't, I'd be in the precarious position of having to trust anyone I met… Now I am in the precarious position of having to mistrust everyone I meet. Should've done that sooner.
First impressions are usually the most faulty.
And so… when I can be certain of everyone else in my party having another, secret motivation for going along with my proposals, why should I be certain of Peter?
I cannot rely on reasoning that paints him in too similar a light as myself. While I may have jumped at the chance to meet someone like myself, someone who is just as dislocated, he may not.
Even as I offer ultimate distractions and indulgences in a life with purpose, I cannot be certain that that is what he desires. He might find it funny to betray me at some point. That is, if he doesn't take his life as seriously as I do… most of the time.
So.
Still I have no one to trust.
Well, no one within a day's journey. I do trust Pakku. Arnook.
To an extent, Aang, Sokka and Katara. Hakoda, to a lesser extent. He can be trusted to secure his children and their freedom.
But I am aware, acutely aware, of their priorities. All of them seem to be better at following their conscience than I. Mine seems to be on standby often enough. Rebirth takes its toll and the most heavily impacting is that you don't know why you should care about a lot of things anymore. A lot of it is about asking yourself why you did in the first place and if you want to continue.
Mess up once, your friends die. Get cocky twice and they suffer. Overestimate your sway and perish.
So, I once more test my ability to bend. Nada. I am beginning to get the feeling they did something like a chi block. Because I can move my extremities just fine, and I no longer feel like I've been hit over the head.
I'm also thirsty. Drugs. I'll be getting the mother of all headaches soon.
Time to figure out a way to gather the moisture into some kind of drinkable form, I think, while I also figure out how to regain my bending ability, or pick the locks with what I have on me.
Ah. I'm fucked.
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