Tartaglia silently cursed Venti's shamelessness.
But deep down, he knew there was no escape.
Being the very first person in the whole alliance to activate a Totem of Undying, his humiliation was practically a public resource now.
Every time a newcomer arrived, this story would be dragged out again like a ceremonial reenactment.
Diluc hadn't lied to him , not even a little.
Tartaglia pressed his lips together and, trying to remain composed, muttered:
"Back then… well…
During our exploration of the Twilight Forest, we encountered an unavoidable danger.
To preserve the progress of the expedition, I fearlessly sacrificed myself.
Thankfully, the Totem saved my life.
That's… pretty much it."
Venti's eyes glimmered with malicious delight.
"Ahh… so you still refuse to tell the truth, grave robber?"
"Grave robber?"
Eula and the others perked up immediately, all turning toward Tartaglia with keen interest.
Tartaglia forced a laugh.
"It's just a nickname, no need to mind it…"
He was just about to clarify, when Hu Tao drifted forward with that ghostly, singsong tone:
"If I remember correctly, weren't we searching the Graveyard for treasure?
Ryen repeatedly warned everyone about the traps buried there~
But someone ignored the warnings…
Triggered a giant TNT detonation…
And got blasted into mist on the spot?"
She tapped her chin innocently.
"So yes , you did die because you were tomb raiding.
Disturbing the dead never ends well. Proof right there."
Tartaglia sank into silence, shoulders slumping like a defeated crab.
"We agreed to leave some dignity intact…" he whispered mournfully.
The Cryo Archon shrugged coldly.
"Dignity? You lost that the moment you blew yourself up. You may as well lose the rest."
She would remember that humiliation , and by extension, the embarrassment inflicted upon Snezhnaya , for a lifetime.
Eula covered her mouth and chuckled.
"So it was a clumsy death. Fits your reckless style perfectly."
Feeling both Rosalyne's and the Tsaritsa's eyes stabbing into him, Tartaglia cleared his throat.
"A moment of carelessness. I hope everyone learns from my example…
Besides! If I hadn't died, would you have found the treasure?!
Some deaths are insignificant ,
But mine was the kind that shakes mountains!"
He puffed up proudly.
"Because of my noble sacrifice, we obtained the Moon Compass, piles of spellbooks, scrolls , all the greatest treasures of the Spooky Forest!
My death had value!"
Diluc nodded solemnly.
"Well said.
A good death."
Tartaglia nearly exploded.
"You, ! I swear, you all, !
It's not like you have no embarrassing stories!"
He jabbed a finger accusingly.
"Diluc! First time throwing a grenade, you misjudged the arc, bounced it off the obsidian wall, and blew yourself half to pieces!"
"Venti! You tried using the Peacock Feather Fan to launch yourself into the air , put too much force into it , and broke your own leg!"
"Hu Tao! During the snowball fight with Ryen, you, "
Hu Tao's eyes narrowed dangerously.
"I what?"
Tartaglia froze.
She was Ryen's girlfriend.
He wanted to live.
"…Married him. Very beautiful, very touching moment. Congratulations."
Hu Tao lifted her chin smugly.
"Thought so."
He had narrowly escaped death… again.
But he had already exposed Diluc and Venti.
Both were now glaring murderously at him.
Finally, Diluc sneered.
"So. You really want to burn every bridge today?"
"You started it! You left me no face!"
"Then perhaps," Diluc said with chilling calm, "it's time to show our new friends… your Gate of Heaven Summoning Ritual."
He reached into his coat pocket , and produced a thick stack of photographs.
Tartaglia's blood ran cold.
Being blown up was embarrassing, sure.
But this?
This was his ultimate forbidden memory.
The night Ryen had tricked him into "summoning the Heavenly Gate," and Tartaglia had spent an entire night jumping, chanting, flailing, performing a ritual so ridiculous that even the Abyss wouldn't accept it.
Diluc had taken pictures.
Hundreds of them.
If those were shown…
He wouldn't just lose face , he'd lose sentience.
He lunged forward, plastering on his meekest smile.
"Diluc, friend , my dear old friend , there's no need to bring up ancient history, right? Let's all… calm down…"
"No," Diluc replied, deadpan. "This is valuable educational material."
Venti hummed happily.
"A perfect lesson in how not to explore this world."
Tartaglia's soul nearly left his body.
"I'll buy ten bottles of top-grade wine from Dawn Winery!"
Diluc and Venti exchanged a glance.
Slowly, they tucked the photos away.
Tartaglia exhaled in relief.
Zhongli finally sighed with a faint smile.
"Truly a lively group."
Had Tartaglia pushed a bit further, Zhongli's own dark history , the time he failed to catch a fish and unleashed "Planet Befall" inside Ryen's villa's fish tank , might have resurfaced.
Even now, Ryen still didn't know who destroyed his aquarium.
A mystery that haunted him to this day.
Ningguang, watching the chaos unfold, laughed softly.
"Regardless, even with Totems of Undying, caution is essential. Avoid using them whenever possible."
Everyone nodded.
Yelan and Eula, however, remained relaxed.
Both hailed from wealthy nations , Mondstadt and Liyue , where people were equipped to the teeth the moment they stepped through the portal.
Diamond-enchanted armor? Standard.
Barrels of alchemical potions? Standard.
Firearms, enchanted weapons, utility items? All standard.
But for those from Inazuma, things were different.
Having only recently joined the alliance, they were starting from nothing.
Even with Ayaka's early exploration, she didn't have enough gear to properly supply Ei, Miko, and the others.
Inazuma truly was beginning from zero.
Ayaka, after all, had explored only a handful of caverns herself.
Kujou Sara mentally calculated everything Inazuma now had to accomplish.
A Totem of Undying farm needed to be built as soon as possible.
Lucky Blocks had to be located.
A proper forward base had to be constructed.
Automated crop farms were crucial , Inazuma's food supply depended on them.
Iron farms, a villager trading hub, mining operations…
Those determined the supply of tools, weapons, and armor.
Pastures, Nether expeditions, End reconnaissance teams…
All of that tied to resource acquisition.
As she listed everything, Sara froze.
The one thousand soldiers she brought…
Far from enough.
Training alone would take time.
And who knew what new dangers or biomes the Minecraft world would spawn by then?
The more she thought about it, the more her temples throbbed.
Had she known, she would have brought three thousand.
Just then, Ryen's voice cut in:
"What's everyone so happily chatting about?"
Everyone turned , Ryen had returned.
Hu Tao looped her arms through his with a grin.
"We were revisiting Tartaglia's embarrassing stories."
"Tartaglia's embarrassing stories?"
Ryen blinked thoughtfully.
"Which one? The time he got blown up tomb raiding? The 'Heaven's Gate' ritual? Or when he spent over ten billion mora just to beg Venti to beat him up?"
Tartaglia deflated like a punctured balloon and sulked off to despair in silence.
Zhongli coughed lightly.
"Have you located the Troll Cave?"
Ryen nodded.
"Northeast, about a thousand meters. If everyone's ready, we can move now and finish quickly."
Without further discussion, the group began marching toward the site.
"What monsters are we expecting?"
Keqing asked.
Ryen answered:
"Not much outside , mostly goblins. Inside, definitely trolls.
They're just elite mobs. Nothing special."
Eula clicked her tongue.
"So no Archdruids? My luck is terrible , I'll remember this grudge."
Ryen chuckled.
Lisa asked softly:
"How long do you think we'll spend in the Twilight Forest this time?"
Sara immediately focused.
The length of the expedition would determine when the Inazuma New Army could finally settle in the region.
Ryen thought carefully.
"Roughly… four to five days?"
"That long?"
Keqing frowned.
"Is the Cloudtop Cottage really that strong?"
"The giants are manageable," Ryen said.
"Mostly, I need time to find the Trees of Time."
Tree of Time?
Miko's ears twitched.
"Their name isn't a metaphor, is it?"
Ryen grinned.
"Not at all. Tree of Time can distort the flow of time within an area.
You all know how mysterious time can be , no need for me to explain."
Miko's eyes widened.
"This world really is bizarre. Even something that manipulates time grows here…"
Ryen shrugged warmly.
"Spend a while here , you'll get used to it."
Miko leaned closer, smiling like a fox with an audacious idea.
"Then… give me one? I've tended the Sacred Sakura for five hundred years, you know. I'm very good with trees."
"Sure."
Miko froze.
Ryen agreeing that fast was not what she expected.
Before she could speak again, Ryen gave her a deep, meaningful look ,
at her ears.
"But you'll have to turn back into a pink-haired fox and let me nap on you for one whole day."
Miko's tail practically bristled.
She internally rolled her eyes so hard she saw eternity.
She was right here , elegant, alluring, devastatingly beautiful.
And this man,
Only wanted the fluffy fox form?!
What kind of strange hobby was this?
Miko inhaled sharply to steady herself, then teased:
"Just nap on the fox? You're sure you don't want to do anything else~?"
Immediately, several of the women , Ganyu included , glared.
Ryen blinked innocently, then smirked.
"For now, I'm only interested in fox-snuggling.
As for anything else…
Ever heard of this?
'Without emotional foundation, everything else is just a castle in the sky.'"
Miko raised an eyebrow.
"Don't tell me you're a pure-love type?"
Ryen straightened his back proudly.
"Who in this world dares say they're more loyal to pure love than me?"
"Really?"
He paused… lowered his voice…
"We can talk privately next time."
Miko covered her mouth, laughing softly.
So in the end, she was still plenty irresistible.
~~----------------------
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