Bianka swallowed the words she was about to say.
Looking at Kiana sitting primly on the sofa—back perfectly straight, hands resting obediently on her knees, looking stiff and tense—anyone could tell she had just caused a major disaster in the kitchen.
Her current posture was clearly out of fear that a certain someone in the kitchen would use any slight misbehavior as an excuse to unleash their wrath upon her.
Yeah, we usually call that projecting your own guilt onto others.
Back in the kitchen, Mei sighed as she dumped the pot of unidentifiable, glowing cyan-green sludge into the trash can, before starting over on a new dish.
Nearby, Sirin carefully handed a glass of water to a heavily hyperventilating Shu, using her other hand to wipe the white foam from the corners of his mouth.
The Herrscher of Wish, who foolishly didn't believe in curses, had drastically miscalculated both a Herrscher's physical constitution and a Kaslana's lethal culinary output. That single bite had nearly triggered his long-dormant [Return of Death] passive.
Shu took the water with trembling hands, tipped his head back to rinse his mouth, and then carefully spat the water into the sink furthest away from the cooking area, making sure not a single drop splashed out.
He rinsed his mouth several times before the agonizing sensation finally began to subside.
In the trash can, the semi-solid cyan-green substance glowed with an ominous vibrancy. Rice Cake, who had nimbly slipped past everyone's feet, hooked his front paws over the edge of the bin and peered inside with profound feline curiosity.
Let's see what nearly assassinated my human.
The moment his nose cleared the rim, a pungent, chemically spicy odor shot straight into the cat's brain.
"HISSSSS!"
Rice Cake hissed violently, all the fur on his body puffing up. Sensing an unprecedented biological threat, he turned into a white blur, sprinting out of the kitchen and diving straight into... Bianka's arms.
Rice Cake was terrified, but he hadn't forgotten exactly who had concocted that biohazard.
Boss lady, you have disappointed me immensely!
Simultaneously, the other elderly cat in the living room immediately bristled upon seeing Rice Cake's actions. Stan leaped off his perch, landing next to Bianka, arched his back like a Spinosaurus, and unleashed a barrage of furious hisses at Rice Cake.
Don't you have your own boss lady? Why are you trying to steal mine?!
Not to be outdone, Rice Cake poked half his head out from Bianka's arms and fired back a rapid-fire string of angry meows.
The intensity and cadence of his meows made it instinctively obvious to everyone present that Rice Cake was cursing, and his vocabulary was incredibly filthy.
The two cats engaged in a heated, cross-species screaming match over Bianka. While they didn't speak the same language, their emotional frequency was perfectly aligned.
Caught in the middle, Bianka instinctively shielded Rice Cake with one arm, her face a mask of utter bewilderment.
What do I do? I think I can understand Rice Cake?
The words themselves weren't quite as vulgar as the emotional delivery suggested, but that was a limitation of Rice Cake's vocabulary, not his intent.
Just then, Bronya emerged from the kitchen, deadpan as ever, leading Seele and the others. She immediately spotted the aggrieved Rice Cake and the bristling Stan engaged in their verbal brawl.
Next to them sat a bewildered Bianka, and a Kiana whose face was steadily growing redder by the second.
Bronya couldn't understand exactly what Rice Cake was arguing with Stan about, but she figured Kiana could. And judging by Kiana's reaction, Rice Cake was definitely criticizing her cooking.
Bronya knew exactly what she had to do: kick her while she was down.
She kept her face perfectly stoic, biting the inside of her cheek to stop herself from smiling at what she was about to do.
Just wait a minute... no, wait forty seconds, then I can laugh.
"Ahem..." Bronya coughed lightly, taking a seat next to Kiana. She adopted a tone resembling a clinical incident report.
"Observation Log: Rice Cake. Combat rating: Herrscher-class. Core Holder: Herrscher of Obsession.
"Prior to dinner today, subject was severely traumatized by a pot of unidentifiable cyan-green sludge, leading to an immediate territorial dispute with subject Stan.
"Bronya formally recommends this incident be recorded in the Fire Moth chronicles. Proposed entry title: 'Geopolitical Crisis Sparked by Kaslana Cuisine.'"
"What the heck is that supposed to mean, Shorty?!" Kiana, already blushing furiously from Rice Cake's relentless trash talk, immediately morphed into the third hissing Spinosaurus in the room.
Hearing Kiana use her favorite derogatory nickname, the corner of Bronya's mouth finally twitched upward into a small smirk. The fact that she was still calling her 'Shorty' meant Kiana wasn't genuinely furious.
"Bronya simply means... cooking should be Sister Mei's task. Idiot Kiana should sit quietly at the table and wait for the food.
"If Idiot Kiana is allowed in the kitchen, it will only result in mass food poisoning."
Wait. Why does that sound so familiar?
"You—!" Kiana's eyes went wide. She pointed a trembling finger at Bronya, completely speechless for several agonizing seconds.
Bronya! You little...! You're using my own words against me?!
Struck dumb by the sheer audacity of the boomerang insult, Kiana puffed her cheeks out like a steamed bun. She crossed her arms, curled her legs up, and sulked aggressively on the sofa.
Honestly, she was confused too. She had followed Mei's instructions step-by-step! Why did the food suddenly turn into that?
It hadn't smelled weird to her at all, but the second Shu took a bite, he started frothing at the mouth!
Was the Kaslana bloodline truly cursed when it came to cooking?
"Kiana... you're probably just out of practice..." Seele, completely unaware that Bronya had just deployed a devastatingly effective boomerang, genuinely felt that her "Sister Bronya" was being a bit too harsh.
She gently patted Bronya's back before stepping forward to comfort the devastated Kiana.
Bronya smoothly slid out of the way, giving Seele the floor.
When you throw a boomerang, the smartest thing to do is stand perfectly still and keep your mouth shut. Every extra word you speak is just another boomerang waiting to hit you in the back of the head.
"It's okay. Cooking is just about practice. If you keep trying, you'll definitely get it," Seele said softly, practically radiating a saintly, healing aura.
"Really?" Kiana, who had been wallowing in self-pity, immediately whipped her head around. Seele nodded earnestly.
Bronya's expression, however, drastically shifted.
"Hmph! See? I knew it!" Before Bronya could intervene, Kiana fully accepted Seele's comfort. She planted her hands on her hips and tilted her chin up confidently. "I was just unfamiliar with that specific recipe!
"If I had just made my signature stir-fried pork, it would've been perfect!"
Kiana wasn't lying. Instant noodles, stir-fried pork, and toast pizza were her holy trinity. She genuinely knew how to make those.
Today... today was just a minor accident!
If she hadn't suddenly decided to try a high-difficulty recipe, none of this would have happened!
Immediately, Kiana jumped up and threw her arm around Seele's shoulders. Beaming, she extended her most sincere invitation to the only girl in the room who truly understood her. "Next time, I'll make my stir-fried pork! Seele, you absolutely have to try it!"
Seele's face went completely pale.