Sensing the mood turn serious, he gently pulled his legs out from under her, so he could sit more comfortably and without their privates touching. Seeing her tense up, with her hands clenched into fists, he cupped her chin in his hand and stared lovingly into her eyes from inches away. "What's wrong? I wasn't offended. After all, there's a lot of truth to that, although I don't think they'd like being called that."
She sighed, dropping her hands and inadvertently exposing her full breasts again in the process. "I know. It's just that I... have issues. I mean, I love, I love, love, love, LOVE what we're doing. I especially love the way you kiss me. It makes me so happy. You banished away my nightmare and all of my worries about that. But then I have NEW worries about what we're doing. I'm so torn. I was having so much fun, but then I reminded myself about all your girlfriends. That makes the whole thing bittersweet for me."
He had completely forgotten about his private vow to not get physically involved with her, in order to save her from his problematic harem lifestyle, but now it all came back and hit him like a slap in the face. He winced. Damn! I was practically dry fucking her a minute ago! What was I thinking?! He mumbled, "Yeah, I see what you mean."
The more he thought clearly, the more disturbed he was. How did this happen?! I came here with the express purpose of telling her we have to keep it platonic. Then somehow I wound up hugging her barely-clothed body. Then I woke up all confused and wound up kissing and touching her before I even knew what was going on. It's as if I'd been tricked, but there's no one really to blame. It just happened!
Is there any way to turn back the clock? Maybe, maybe... somehow just call this another "practice" necking session or something? We still have all the same problems as before. I'm still flirting with disaster here.
But dammit, disaster is just too tempting! Christine is basically naked in my arms and raring to go. She's so hot to trot! How can I stop now?! I can't!
She asked, "Is it true? Is it true about you having some sort of harem? I keep hearing things and even seeing things, but I just can't believe it."
He thought, Oh, man, I do NOT want to have this conversation. Especially not now. Just look at those magnum mamas! I was just starting to have fun with them. Why'd I have to talk about how lucky I am? IDIOT! Oh, well. On the other hand, my vow. Can't forget the vow.
He sighed. "It depends on what you might call a harem, I guess."
She shot him an angry look. "Don't go all Bill Clinton on me all of a sudden. Next, you're gonna say it depends on what the definition of 'is' is. Do you or do you not have a group of lovers, say, more than three, who are all basically permanently attached to you?"
He wanted to quibble, such as questioning the definition of "permanently," but he realized that was just delaying the inevitable. He closed his eyes and winced. "Basically, I do."
She stared at him, hard. "'Basically.'"
He sighed, realizing the erotic mood was gone for the moment (although a residual lusty mood remained, which helped explain why she wasn't bothering to cover up, even with the cool night air). His erection kept threatening to wilt, but the fact that she was sitting right in front of him, wearing nothing but a pair of skimpy bikini bottoms soaked in her own juices, prevented that from happening.
He said, "It's hard to explain. But this is why I've been trying to keep from getting involved with you, because of the other women in my life. You believe in exclusivity and, for you, I think that's very much the right choice. So I don't think you would ever accept my complicated life."
"Yeah, I have issues with that. Big issues. It's just so wrong!"
"It's not wrong. I don't wanna go on an anti-Christian church rant here, but I feel one coming on. Christianity is great in and of itself, but the ways churches have practiced it have twisted it all around. What did John Lennon say? Something about how Jesus was a great guy, but his followers were thick and ordinary. And Neil Young sings in a song: 'Churches all teach sex is wrong. Jesus, where has nature gone?' My point is, it used to be that most cultures around the world were NOT monogamous. Islam even still allows multiple marriages. But the Christian churches taught that any sexual pleasure is a sin and you can only have one partner, if even that. Priests don't even get one!"
He went on, "Christine, think about it. Maybe what you've been taught about monogamy vs. polygamy is only a social construct of this culture we live in. It's not the one and only way to do things. If you were born into a different culture, you might have been raised to think polygamy was perfectly natural."
She frowned. "Well, you might have a point... in theory," - and even that much of an admission made her curl her lip in distaste - "but that's an awfully convenient position for YOU to take, bucko. It allows you to have sexy fun with who knows how many women."
"It's not like that! I LOVE them! Look, I know you may not believe me when I say this, but it's not just about sex. That's why I can't even think about letting them go. Besides, it's not like the fun is all one-sided. I give them a lot of pleasure too. Sex is a wonderful, shared experience, or at least it should be."
She gave him a disgusted and disbelieving look.
He forced himself to keep his eyes on her face and not glance down at her lightly jiggling 38Fs. She's so beautiful when she's mad, he thought. "Come on, when you see Amy and me together, doesn't it look like we're in love?"
Her eyes narrowed, dangerously. "It does. And that hurts. These things do affect me personally in a big way. What if you were dating a girl for a few months, only to be surprised that she was dating another guy the whole time? And then when you get mad about that, she'd says, 'Sorry, but it's none of your business?' Is THAT fair?"
"No," he admitted. "But it's not a fair analogy. I'm not cheating on you, since we're not in some kind of committed relationship. You've known about my other lovers - some of them, anyway - for some time now, yet you're still interested in me. Do you know how tough it's been for me to keep our relationship strictly platonic? It's been torture. But I know you would have trouble dealing with anything other than a monogamous relationship. Monogamy isn't for everybody, but it's what you need and what I think you deserve."
She frowned, and then said, "Fine. I see your point. How about this, then? You say you love Amy, right? Well, how would you feel if a few months from now, she decides that since you have other lovers, that it's okay for her to take another lover as well? Do you expect her to be exclusive to you?"
"Yes I do. She thinks our arrangement is just fine."
She grimaced. "Okay, bad example. She's got a perplexing attitude about that; I'm gonna have to talk to her about it. But what about Glory then?"
He answered carefully, while still forcing himself not to run his eyes all over her very nearly completely naked body. "Glory can do what she wants. She's her own woman. Of course, I'd be sad. Crushed, even. But the brutal fact is, the reality that I have other lovers would lessen the blow for me."
"But why not just allow her to have other lovers, then, and still be with you? I imagine even you have to be stretched pretty thin with all these women in your life. Wouldn't that be fair, and take some of the pressure off you?"
He thought, Speaking of taking the pressure off, I need some serious help with this painful boner! Even now, I can't get flaccid around this woman! Christ! I wish she'd get with the 'stealth stroking while talking' program. Yeah, right! Like that'll ever happen. I must be horribly spoiled.
But he merely said, "Yes. That would be the logical thing to do. Call me a selfish bastard, but I just can't do that. I love and treasure my women and can't bear to share them with another man. I know that's hypocritical, but it is what it is."
"It's VERY hypocritical."
He bowed his head. "I know. Now, if they want to sleep with other women, then I'm fine with that, strange as that may seem to you. Maybe it's a double standard, but I don't think a man can share the same woman with another man without there being big trouble down the road. I guess I can't help it, but I've got some of the possessive caveman in me." He immediately thought of his situation with Brenda and Adrian, and wondered how that would end up.
Arousal was still flowing through Christine's body like a raging river, yet she was intellectual and interested in the discussion at the same time. "It IS a double standard, Alan. You're taking advantage just because you can. I'll bet your women are chafing under your incredibly hypocritical rules."
She crossed her arms underneath her bare boobs, but then realized how that sexily thrust them forward as if on a platter, and that wasn't the message she wanted to convey at that moment. She resorted to putting a hand on a hip instead to look suitably peeved.
"You'd think so, but they're not. Everybody's really happy, and I truly believe that's not just some pose. Look at Amy, for instance. Talk with her. See if she feels like she's 'chafing.' But each person is different, and this arrangement isn't for everybody. I strongly suspect it isn't for you."
She said sadly, "I'm sorry, but you're right about that. Maybe you're right that we're doomed and can't be together for the long-term. I can accept that you have other lovers, on a purely rational level, but when I think about it and mentally picture you with another woman, it's like you're ripping my heart out. I know I don't have any right to claim an exclusive hold on you, not now anyway, but that's just how I feel. I can't help myself! When I think about those other women, I want to tear their eyes out. But I want to be with you so badly too. I'm all messed up!"
Her words made him sad, but they came as no surprise. Problems like this were why he'd been trying to keep her at arm's length in the first place. He thought, If she's having these kinds of issues now, imagine how much worse it'll be if we get really serious! Man, this sucks.
She tried to push her sadness away, but jealousy came to the fore instead. She said bitterly, "I bet I can guess who else is in this harem of yours."
She leaned forward and dropped her head down, inadvertently causing her boobs to swing forward and appear to be a couple of sizes larger than they actually were.
But he couldn't fully enjoy the display, since he was panicking over what she'd just said. He decided to tell her a bit more, if only to try to stop her from snooping around on her own. What can I tell her? Who can I tell her about? Mom and Sis are out of the question; she'll KILL me. Slowly and painfully!
Brenda? She doesn't know about Brenda. No, Brenda's just far too... Brenda-ish. Between her insanely huge boobs and her submissiveness, that's just a bad idea all around. What if they were to meet?! Yikes!
Hmmm, Aunt Suzy. Er, I mean Suzanne. Now, there's a possibility. That should shock her enough to get her to back off. But she's got to agree to stop snooping first.
He said, "Okay, I'll make you a deal. I don't want to play 20 questions with you. It's not fair to me, because you put me in the position of either answering your questions and violating someone's privacy, or lying to you to protect them, neither of which I find acceptable. But if you agree to stop questioning me on this, I'll tell you about one of the women I love that you don't know about. Just ONE."
He winced, because the "just one" comment made clear there was more than one, and probably more than two.
Luckily, that didn't bother her much, since she'd already assumed that was the case. She spoke her thoughts out loud. "Well, I already know you are sleeping with Amy and über-bitch Heather. Plus, I know you've done it with Kim and Simone, and most likely Joy and Janice besides. And I know about Ms. Rhymer, since I caught you on the beach with her."
FUCK ME! Christine cursed to herself. That's seven right there, and there's at least two or three more! And look at me, sitting here with my big, bare breasts bouncing all over the place. UGH!
Alan leveled his gaze at Christine, meeting her eyes. "See, that's exactly what I'm talking about; she has a right to her privacy."
Feeling chastened, Christine looked away. "Okay, yes, you're right. I stuck my nose into your private business. I was wrong, and it puts her in danger of losing her job. But you know, the two of you chose to get involved and flirt with danger. So where is your responsibility?"
"I know it's not an optimal situation."
She sat up and clenched a fist at him. "Optimal situation?! That's so weak! Alan, you're having sex with your TEACHER!"
He spoke with sincerity and passion. "I know. In fact, it's a disaster. But haven't you heard the expression 'love is blind'? We love each other. It's not just the sexual attraction; she's a wonderful person: kind, and smart, and nice, and yes, beautiful. I'm happy just to talk with her for hours. It's love!"
"Oh, Alan." Tears welled up in Christine's eyes. She struggled not to break down, hearing him say what was so clearly true. He really DOES love Glory! And Amy, too, I'm sure. God, I feel terrible, because where's the room in his heart for me?! He obviously can handle the multiple lover situation, but I can't.
Yet... despite everything, my heart burns for him! I think I truly could be in love with him. And I'm definitely in lust with him! Even as we talk about his many other lovers, I can't wait to get back to what we were doing earlier!
He continued, "I'm sorry, Christine, but the fact is, I love more than one person. It's complicated, and hard to deal with. Tell me, how am I supposed to choose? Really! Think about it. Am I supposed to go to people that I love and say, 'Sorry, I've decided to not love you anymore?' Is that what I should do? Should I decide to not care about YOU anymore? To be completely consistent with your monogamous thinking, should I stick with Amy only and never touch you again? I refuse to do that."
That last question hit her hard. She had no answer to the contradictions involved, so simply lashed out, "You're supposed to make sure you don't fall in love with multiple women at the same time in the first place!" She pounded a fist on the arm of her lounge chair, creating quite an erection-inspiring tit-quake.
He gave a sharp, barking laugh. "Well, I wish someone had warned me about that before it was too late! Of course, two months ago I wouldn't have believed them. It's so surreal. Can't you see how things have gotten complicated for me?"
She nodded reluctantly.
"So anyway, will you stop snooping in my life if I tell you one new name?"
"Good grief! Just how many more new names are there?!"
"That's not the question."
She frowned and pouted, "I'm not sure I want to know." She felt the burning pain of jealousy, and it physically hurt like a bad case of heartburn. But her arousal stayed sky-high just the same.
He stared at her critically. "Then why play guessing games?"
She looked at him, and then looked down towards her feet. "Okay, I guess I'm curious. I can't help it. I really don't want to hear about it, but it's like I can't help myself. Maybe it's like seeing a car wreck - you don't want to look, but you can't turn away."
He waited while she stared off into the darkness beyond the pool of light around them. Although he remained focused on the conversation, with her eyes averted he couldn't help but ogle her glorious body from head to toe. That revived his flagging erection.
Finally, she muttered, "Fine. Fine, tell me."
He said, "Okay, I really shouldn't be doing this without her permission, but if I tell you some more about my quote 'harem' unquote, maybe you'll come to understand that it's really about love and not just sex."
Unable to resist the temptation, she started to speculate. "Well, Amy's one, certainly, and Ms. Rhymer could-"
He held up a hand. "You don't know most of them. They don't go to this school."
She exclaimed, "I know seven names already! SEVEN! Are you telling me that's not even the HALF of it?!"
"No. Most of those names you count, like Janice and Joy, I don't count. Just because I've had sex with someone a little bit... that's a whole different thing. Lots of people are sexually active. I'm sure plenty of people at our school have had many more sex partners than I have."
Thank fucking God for that! Christine thought. So maybe the number isn't as big as I'd feared.
He said, "As for Glory, the exact nature of our relationship is something private between her and me. Would you want me to tell her what you and I've done today?"
Christine shook her head 'No' very emphatically. That set off another inadvertent tit-quake.
While she had basically forgotten that she was topless, he certainly had not. Damn! How frustrating! For the first time in my life, I get to see Christine's huge hooters in all their glory, but we have to have a serious conversation that makes me actually wish they weren't so jiggly and distracting. I need to think. THINK! And my damn stiff dick isn't helping matters!
After considering her words some more, he added, "So please don't ask then. Besides, if I did tell you all the names, you'd just start nosing around and invading their privacy. You must admit that you get far too curious sometimes. I don't think you'd like it if YOU were the target of snooping."
She hesitated. She knew the way she poked into other people's business was a very bad habit, but she couldn't help herself. "I'll try to be better, but I just have to know: does that include Heather? Please tell me you aren't in love with Heather. I couldn't stand it!"
He couldn't help but throw back his head and laugh at that idea. "In love with Heather?! God no, I'm not THAT crazy!" Actually, that wasn't exactly true, as he realized he did love her in some weird and unique way, but it was complicated and he knew that would launch a discussion he didn't want to get into.
Christine, though, was so relieved by his response that she jumped up from the lounge chair and shouted "YES!" She stretched her arms high in the air in triumph. Words could not describe how happy she was to hear that he wasn't in love with Heather.
But by standing and stretching her body like that, she didn't fully realize what an erotic show she was putting on for him. The fact that she had closed her eyes made it even more tempting for him to gawk.
And gawk he did. Jesus Christ! I wanna get my hands back on that body! She's so fucking athletic and fit! And stacked! God, this is painful, though! I need to CUM! Alan Junior is suffering! He needs to be sliding along her pussy, like we did before. Or better yet, in her cleavage! Or sliding in and out of her hot mouth! Oh, man! FUUUUCK!
Just look at her! Can I cum just from looking?!
She froze in her stretched-out position as she realized that he had to be staring at her. She was torn between lust and shame, so didn't know if she should cover up as best she could with her arms, or put on a sexy show.
Because of the nature of their conversation, she still felt more serious than aroused, although she was discovering that being topless in front of him felt surprisingly liberating and good. She certainly had noticed that his dick continued to poke stiffy against his swimsuit, and that emboldened her. She let him ogle her for a few more moments, then opened her eyes and slowly turned to face him.
She sat down on the lounge chair, keeping her back stiff and her bouncy bare tits thrust out. Hot damn, that felt good! I love showing off for him. I love the way he looks at me. This must be what love is like!
She kept those thoughts to herself and tried to refocus on the issue at hand, especially Heather. "Well, at least you show some judgment. Besides, how could I stop digging up dirt on her? I LIVE for that!"
He snorted mirthfully. "Okay, Heather, fine. School stuff, fine. There's probably no way you could stop that anyway, unless you stopped listening to all school gossip whatsoever, and that would be like asking you to stop breathing. But my private relationships outside of school, those are completely off limits. Plus, in school, I obviously don't want you nosing around about Glory, Amy, or people like that either. No snooping around me or my house to see whom I'm with or what I'm doing. And trying to be better isn't good enough. I want a complete 'no snooping' firewall. Agreed?"
The way he so easily surrendered Heather to her made her conclude that he probably didn't care for her that much after all. I'm sure that on a purely sexual level, the bitch has her... talents. And with Alan being such an incredible stud, he's going to want to have only the very best. It pisses me off, and it has to stop soon, but as long as there's no actual love involved, I'm not going to tear her limb from limb... Yet!
She grudgingly mumbled, "Fine. Agreed. So who is this mystery girl you say you love?"
He took a deep breath and then blurted it out. "Suzanne Pestridge. Amy's mother. I love her."