"You told me nothing was going on!" Severus said sharply, his arms folded neatly across his chest as he looked down his nose at Cassie.
"I was telling the truth!" she protested, genuinely feeling as though she were innocent in all of this.
"Really?" he replied, his tone condescending and accusatory. "Then what reason would you have to come to me now, when I had this very conversation with you two days ago?"
"Severus, you really make it difficult for me to come to you with shit. You do realize that, don't you?" Cassie said, exasperated that she was being berated simply for entering his classroom and telling him they needed to revisit their conversation from Tuesday. It was only a few minutes before first period, and although she was free for the first hour, she knew he would soon have a classroom full of third years.
The Potions Master let out an irked sigh, pinching the bridge of his nose. "I don't have time to debate your opinion of how personable I am. Tell me."
"Good, because that would take until the end of the week."
"On with it, Miss Black," he snapped, the words carrying an unmistakable warning.
Fighting the urge to continue teasing him, Cassie told him about the last two nights: the tiny tug she had felt at the edges of her mind and how it had stopped both times when she began looking around, trying to determine whether someone was concentrating on her.
His hardened expression softened as his thoughts moved beyond the drafty classroom and toward the implications of what she had told him. Cassie found herself staring at him longingly as his black eyes fixed on a point somewhere behind her, his features thoughtful and severe.
When he finally spoke, she was slightly startled and hoped he hadn't noticed her gawking at him.
"Did you wake up screaming this morning?" he asked quietly, glancing toward the classroom door. They were still alone, but students could arrive at any moment.
"Danika threw her shoe at me, so I'm guessing yes," Cassie replied dully. "Why?"
"It cannot be a coincidence. The nightmares you conveniently aren't remembering, and whoever is attempting to enter your mind."
"Okay. So what do I do about it?"
Cassie dreaded the answer because she suspected she already knew it. And she couldn't agree to it. The thought alone was humiliating.
"You have to let me use Legilimency on you, Cassie," he said, his baritone voice dropping even lower. "Even if you cannot remember the nightmares, I may be able to pull them forward." His gaze flicked past her again. Cassie turned and saw two students entering the classroom. "We'll discuss it further later. When are you free again?"
Cassie immediately began stumbling over her words. "I—well, Professor, I'm busy. Very busy." One eyebrow rose. "I have classes and eating, and studying—"
And then she was out the door.
She didn't realize she had been holding her breath until she reached the staircase leading out of the dungeons and into the Entrance Hall. She released it so abruptly that she sounded as though she were choking.
Babbs, walking past with his arm slung casually around a blonde girl, looked at her with surprised concern.
"You all right, Black?"
"Yeah. Sure," she said absently. Then she picked a random direction and started walking.
She had intended to study in the library until her next class, but now all she could think about was the fact that Severus wanted to delve into her mind and ransack her thoughts and memories.
It was intimate. Uncomfortable.
And although it wasn't entirely foreign between them—he had used Legilimency on her countless times during their Occlumency lessons—this was different. Now she was hiding something.
And it wasn't sinister. It wasn't something that would get her into trouble. It was simply something she couldn't bear for him to know. Her attraction to him. The humiliating, hopeless feelings she had been desperately trying to suppress.
She couldn't stand the thought of Severus discovering them, only to have them go unrequited. She assumed—no, knew—that he didn't feel the same way about her. If he found out, he'd reject them, and she would have to live with the knowledge that he knew.
It would ruin everything. Their friendship. Their dynamic. The one stable thing she had at Hogwarts.
It had to be protected.
Instead of going to the library, she made her way to the Astronomy Tower. Only a fifth-year couple was there, making out in one of the stairwells. They immediately unglued themselves and hurried away when Cassie came into view.
She sat on the cold stone floor and stared out the window for several minutes before pulling parchment and a quill from her knapsack. She needed a distraction, and so began composing a letter to Tonks.
Dora,
I hope this finds you well, and still with all remaining limbs.
Hogwarts is the same, except Slytherin has added our "dear" cousin, as we expected. I hear Hufflepuff has already quadrupled its house points in the first three days without you here getting into mischief, however.
Tell those Aurors to save a spot for me. Let me know how things are going.
Much love,
Cass
She spent another half hour enjoying the solitude of the tower before heading to the Owlery to send the letter.
After releasing the borrowed owl, she watched it disappear into the sky, wondering how far it would have to fly before reaching its destination. Tonks could still be in Europe, or perhaps on another continent for training. No one outside the Ministry was really privy to those details.
Cassie wondered how Aunt Andromeda was coping with not being able to remain in constant contact with her only daughter. She decided she'd have to make time to write to her soon, too.
But for now, that would have to wait. It was time for class.
Concentrating on her lessons proved difficult on that gloomy Thursday, and not simply because flashes of the steamy, Severus-centric dreams from the night before kept popping into her mind. Admittedly, those weren't helping.
What truly occupied her thoughts was the fact that she was now actively trying to avoid him. Up until the evening, it seemed to work.
She even decided not to eat in the Great Hall, hoping to avoid being in the same room with him altogether. Instead, she stopped by the kitchens and ate sandwiches while chatting with a few of the house-elves she had gotten to know over the years.
Once she was in the library studying with the usual duo of Alpit and Juniper, however, it became much harder to disappear. She was deep into an Arithmancy problem when she felt a sharp tap on her shoulder.
She turned and found Draco standing behind her, wearing an expression of supreme boredom.
"What?" she whispered sharply. He rolled his eyes.
"I have a note from Professor Snape." The tone in his voice suggested that she should already know this.
"I'm busy." She turned back to her textbook, hoping that if she ignored him, both he and the note would eventually disappear. Juniper cleared her throat pointedly.
"I'm not a servant boy," Draco said flatly. He dropped the folded piece of parchment onto the desk in front of her and walked away without another word. Cassie stared at the yellow paper as though it might bite her.
"Well?" Alpit asked expectantly. "Aren't you going to open it?"
Cassie shrugged and tilted her head toward Madam Pince, who was beginning to scowl at their table of delinquent whisperers. The subject wasn't brought up again.
She waited until the three of them had parted ways and were heading toward their respective common rooms before finally unfolding the parchment.
My office. Now.
The note had been delivered an hour ago. He was furious by now. Cassie knew it.
She decided to head toward the Slytherin common room for the night and take her chances. Unfortunately, her plan to avoid her Head of House wouldn't work.
"Black, Professor Snape wants to see you," Babbs called as she crossed the area in front of the fireplace. She ignored him and glanced toward the grandfather clock near the bookcases. Half past ten. It was late. Surely he couldn't expect her to report to his office now. "Black!"
She continued toward the dormitory. Unfortunately, she shared it with another Slytherin prefect, Wladyslawa Laanstra, who promptly followed her. "Black!"
"Yes, I heard you, Laanstra," Cassie said irritably, already knowing her strategy wasn't feasible.
"He seemed pretty adamant that you needed to go there. I'd really rather not have him come into the common room to fetch you. We'd have to hide all the Play Witch copies, firewhiskey, and Amortentia around here in case he decides to do a surprise inspection—"
Cassie held up a hand. "I get it. God forbid all you heathens have to hide the banned paraphernalia around here and ruin the fun." She dropped her bag onto her bed. "Don't say I haven't done any of you any favors." Then she turned around and headed back toward the common room. And, reluctantly, toward Severus's office.
As expected, he was rather miffed that it had taken her so long to arrive.
He was seated behind his desk, grading papers, and when she entered, he merely looked up and silently glared at her. Cassie stopped in front of his desk.
"You wanted to see me, sir?" She hoped the respectful address might ease his displeasure. It didn't.
He abruptly stopped writing and threw his quill across the room. He stood so quickly that his chair scraped violently across the stone floor, making Cassie flinch.
"You disobey my requests and then come in here with that blatant sarcasm?" he barked. Spittle actually landed on her cheek.
Cassie stared at him with wide eyes. She had done it now, but still, she stood her ground. "I wasn't being sarcastic, I promise—"
"What are you being, then, girl?" he hissed, his lips curling into an angry sneer. "Difficult? Contemptuous? A waste of my time?"
"So I was busy," Cassie replied, struggling to keep her voice even as his hostile features hovered mere inches from her face. "I'm sorry. What more do you want me to say? I'm here!"
He let out a low growl and abruptly turned away. Cassie dared to breathe again.
"You aren't telling me everything," he said, his back still to her. His voice was silky and even now. Somehow, it was more intimidating than the shouting. "And I ask you again: What is going on?"
"I've told you!"
He grunted in annoyance. Severus knew her well enough to recognize when she was hiding something, and Cassie had never been particularly good at keeping secrets from him.
Why she felt the need to keep something from him now, when he essentially knew everything about her, was something he couldn't fathom. "Fine." He slowly turned around, and his black eyes glittered with something that made Cassie's stomach tighten. "I will know soon enough."
"Know what?" she challenged. When she had entered the room, she'd intended to be submissive in an attempt to keep the peace. But when Severus was acting like a presumptuous asshole, she could never seem to keep her temper.
"Cassie, I'm trying to help you."
"There's nothing to help," she lied. For one of the rare times in their years of knowing one another, Severus Snape looked genuinely dumbfounded.
"Pardon me? Did you not inform me just this morning that you felt someone trying to read your mind?"
"That's right. And I'm not about to just let someone do it again."
"If someone is getting in, then you need to practice again—"
"I can practice on my own."
"What about the nightmares?"
Cassie stared at him silently. "Give me a Dreamless Sleep potion," she said. The idea came to her suddenly, and the more she thought about it, the better it seemed.
"That will not be the solution if you aren't recalling them in the first place," Severus argued. But Cassie was beginning to feel a tiny ray of hope.
Maybe—just maybe—she could get this man out of her head.
If she could stop having those lust-filled dreams about him, perhaps she could finally have some peace. She could concentrate on her schoolwork instead of spending every waking moment worrying about what she felt for him.
To her utter surprise, Severus eventually agreed.
Reluctantly, he went to his stores and retrieved a small flask of purple elixir, though Cassie could tell he wasn't entirely satisfied with their arrangement. She hoped it worked. Anything was better than revisiting Legilimency.
When he handed her the flask, their fingers brushed. A shiver shot through Cassie's arm and raced down her spine, and she shuddered.
Oh, yes. She was in trouble.
Friday morning came, and Cassie couldn't recall a single detail of any dream. Unfortunately, her dorm mates quickly informed her that she'd been shrieking again. She launched into another round of apologies, attempting to convince them not to tell Professor Snape. Even as she offered to do their Transfiguration essays over the weekend, she knew it wouldn't work.
"Black, if this crap keeps up, you'll be sleeping in the corridor!" Laanstra announced. The other girls nodded emphatically.
There was no point in trying to avoid Severus today, anyway. She had another double Potions lesson.
Expecting the worst from him, Cassie was surprised when he seemed distracted and treated her with cold indifference. Under normal circumstances, that might have bothered her. Today, however, it was almost a relief.
He treated the entire class the same way, rather than singling out the seventh years and making them squirm. Even when one Gryffindor boy managed to make enormous black flames shoot from his cauldron toward the ceiling for several chaotic seconds, Severus merely disposed of the concoction with a flick of his wand and sent the boy from the room without even berating him first.
Cassie wondered whether the first lesson of the year—the one in which he'd treated them all like particularly stupid dogs—had been some sort of initiation. Perhaps he intended to treat his elite students with a little more respect now. Even to her, however, that seemed unlikely.
The end of class finally came, and Cassie almost made it through the door without speaking to him. Almost.
"Miss Black."
She grimaced and turned back. "Professor?" She approached his desk, hoping the formality of the address wouldn't send him into another rage. Instead, he merely looked troubled.
"How did the potion work for you last night?"
Cassie hesitated for a few seconds. "I don't recall any dreams." It wasn't a lie, technically. Did omitting the fact that her dorm mates had been awakened by her screaming count as lying?
Severus stared at her. Cassie felt her palms begin to sweat.
No. He would have said something by now.
"Anything else, Miss Black?"
"No."
His lips pulled back slightly as he inhaled through his teeth. He had been waiting for her to volunteer the entire truth. "Why are you hiding things from me?"
"Why are you having the other girls spy on me?" she countered. The muscle beneath his eye twitched, and Cassie knew she had struck a nerve.
"You will report to my office this evening, and we will get to the bottom of this." He turned away and began moving around the room, waving his wand as he went. Stacks of ingredients pulled themselves from cupboards and floated neatly onto the small desks.
Cassie inhaled slowly. "No."
Severus stopped and turned gracefully on his heel. "No? I don't recall giving you a choice."
Her temper flared as she moved toward the door. Severus caught her forearm as she passed.
"Let go of me," she said quietly.
"I am your Head of House, and I am deciding what is best here. You will report to my office—"
"No!"
"Do I have to involve Dumbledore?" Severus hissed.
Cassie yanked her arm free. "Go ahead, Severus! Tell him you'd like to rifle through my mind against my will!"
"He would agree with me, and you know it!" His voice rose. "What has gotten into you, stupid girl? You would rather someone in this castle invade your mind, possibly control it? You know the dangers that could bring!"
Cassie knew he was right, but that only made her angrier. She wanted everything to disappear.
The fear of him discovering her attraction to him and the humiliation that would follow. The possibility of ruining their relationship.
The unknown assailant inside her mind. All of it.
She wanted one normal year. She wanted to finish school, graduate, and become a Dark wizard catcher. Was that really too much to ask?
"I'll come to your office tonight," she said slowly after a long internal debate. She couldn't bring herself to look at him. "But that doesn't mean I'll agree to Legilimency."
"Fair enough."
Cassie knew he was only suspending the argument because his next class was about to begin. She left.
As she passed through the corridor, she saw a group of first years and caught sight of Draco's platinum-blond head. She gave him a small wave before noticing Ron Weasley.
"Hey, Ron!" Real cheerfulness returned to her voice at the sight of him. Then she noticed the boy walking beside him. Harry Potter. "First Potions lesson?"
"Yeah," Ron said, making a face.
Cassie smiled. "You'll be all right."
"That's not what Fred and George said," Ron said solemnly. "Hey, we're going to Hagrid's at three for tea. You want to come?"
Cassie almost declined, as she had plenty of homework to do. But she hadn't had a chance to catch up with the gamekeeper yet, so she agreed. She had class until four and would meet them afterward.
Now she had another reason to fret. She assumed Ron's use of we meant himself and Potter, but perhaps that was exactly what she needed.
What better way to distract herself before a stressful evening with Severus than to spend some time in a tiny hut with Harry Potter?
By the time her lessons ended and she headed toward Hagrid's hut, it finally dawned on her. Severus had been distracted because it had been his first class with Potter. She made a mental note to ask him why the boy bothered him so much, beyond the reasons she already knew. There was no way Severus would volunteer that information himself.
She knocked on Hagrid's door and entered. A slobbering Fang immediately greeted her, his tail wagging furiously. Cassie had thought ahead and had snagged a large soup bone from the kitchens. She handed it to him before pouring herself a cup of parsnip tea.
Ron, Harry, and Hagrid were discussing something about Gringotts. Harry abruptly stopped talking when Cassie looked at him. "No worries," she said, taking a seat beside the fire. "I have no clue what you're talking about, and I really don't care. Honest."
"Harry, this is Cassie Black," Ron said, finally taking the opportunity to properly introduce them. "She's been a friend of the family for ages, and she dated my brother Charlie until this summer. Cassie, this is—"
"Harry Potter. I know." She took a sip of tea. "How did your Potions lesson go?" The boys exchanged glances and Cassie groaned.
"Snape is horrible," Ron said. "Hated Harry—"
"He does not hate Harry," Hagrid interrupted, sounding as though he'd already repeated the statement several times.
"He does," Harry insisted, still avoiding Cassie's eyes. "He took away two house points."
"That's nothing," Cassie said nonchalantly, waving a hand. "I have Potions with kids from all four houses. He takes points from everyone. And in seventh year, he'll take more than two points. Trust me."
"Bet he'll never take them from Malfoy," Harry said darkly. "Stupid git."
Ron snorted into his tea as Cassie smirked. "Malfoy is Cassie's cousin!" Ron announced gleefully.
Harry looked horrified. "Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't mean—"
"Don't apologize, Harry. I know he's a stupid git," said Cassie. Ron erupted into full-blown belly laughter.
Their visit lasted about an hour, filled with conversation and laughter, before the three students finally headed back toward the castle for dinner. The subject of Voldemort murdering Harry's parents never came up.
In hindsight, Cassie realized it probably would have been a strange thing to discuss under the circumstances. Besides, she assumed Ron and Harry had probably already talked about it between themselves. She simply hoped Harry wouldn't be quite so apprehensive around her now that they'd spent some time together.
When they reached the Great Hall, Cassie reminded the boys that they could come to her for tutoring if they ever needed it. Harry actually smiled. It was small, but it was there.
Then they headed toward their separate tables. Cassie's good mood quickly evaporated when she remembered what awaited her that evening.
She dragged her feet the entire way to Severus's office, secretly hoping he had forgotten their appointment. Perhaps he'd double-booked himself with some other poor student's detention. Unfortunately, when she entered his office, she found herself alone with him.
He sat behind his desk, scratching away at papers. Nothing unusual.
Cassie had barely approached when he flicked his wand. The door behind her slammed shut, and the lock clicked. Her nerves were already stretched to breaking point, and the sound seemed to echo inside her skull.
"Good evening, Miss Black," Severus drawled.
Cassie swallowed. "Hello, Severus."
"Sit down."
She obeyed. For a while, she entertained herself by looking at the shelves of ingredients lining the room. Eventually, however, her attention drifted. She found herself staring at the deep raven shade of his hair as he bent over his papers.
"Your cousin did well in his lesson today," Severus said.
Cassie's eyes snapped upward. "Oh." She straightened in her chair. "That's swell. How did Ron do?"
"Who?"
Cassie gave him a look that said Really? "Weasley."
Severus's demeanor changed instantly. "He was with Potter."
"Of course," Cassie said carefully. "It seems they're friends." She paused. "And Potter seems to think you hate him already. Why would he think that?"
"How do you—"
"I had tea with him and Ron less than an hour ago," Cassie interjected as she folded her arms. "And it seems you've already assumed the position of a bully when you should be looking after him."
"It's not your concern!" he spat. "And while you're at it, stop preaching at me and look after your own family instead!"
Cassie blinked. "Excuse me?"
"You have your cousin to worry about, whom you ignore. Instead, you're concerned with your ex-boyfriend's snot-nosed little brother and the child who was orphaned because of your own murderous family!"
He was trying to make her feel guilty. Cassie knew it, as it wasn't a new tactic. But knowing that didn't make it hurt any less.
"Seriously, Severus?" she seethed as her anger finally broke through. "Screw off!" She stood.
"Where do you think you're going?"
"I don't have to listen to this!"
"We have work to do!"
She was already near the door. She tried the handle, having forgotten it was locked, and reached into her robes for her wand. Then his hand closed around her arm.
Cassie fought the urge to slap him. "Let go of me, Severus!"
"Miss Black, sit back down!" he barked. "You're picking a fight and using it as an excuse to leave!"
"I am not!"
"Do you think I'm stupid?" He yanked her toward the middle of the room.
Cassie complied only because she knew she'd be in serious trouble if she cursed him. And, infuriatingly, she knew he was right. He usually was when it came to her. Even when he was being blunt, cruel, and infuriating.
She sat at one of the desks and crossed her arms over her chest. Severus began slowly circling her. "Have you felt someone pull at your mind today, Miss Black?"
"No."
"Are you telling me the truth?"
"Yes!"
"Don't speak to me in that tone," he said quietly. "You and I both know you haven't been truthful as of late. What is it that you've been hiding?"
Cassie stood, but Severus responded with a quick flick of his wrist. Magic pressed down against her shoulders, forcing her back into the chair. She glared at him.
"We have to use Legilimency," he said softly. "I need to get to the bottom of this, or we are putting the entire school in danger."
"No," she countered. This time, he allowed her to stand and head toward the door. She reached it, pulled out her wand, and readied to unlock it. Then Severus was suddenly upon her.
His hand closed around her shoulder and spun her around. Her back struck the door as he pinned her there, his wand already in his other hand.
Cassie's heart slammed against her ribs. "Severus—"
"Legilimens!" The spell struck, and images flashed between them. Her classes. The Slytherin common room. Tea at Hagrid's. King's Cross. A conversation with Molly Weasley.
He moved through her study sessions with Juniper and Alpit. Her tutoring session on Wednesday.
None of them were what he was looking for, so he pushed past them. Searching, digging. Looking for the unknown presence that came at night. And then he found what she had been shielding with such desperate ferocity.
Visions of himself.
Severus and Cassie touching, kissing. Hands roaming. Bodies pressed together. Every forbidden fantasy she had tried desperately to bury.
They flashed through their connected minds with humiliating clarity. And immediately afterward came the thoughts that had plagued her for weeks.
He'll find out. I have to get rid of these feelings. I can't let this ruin everything. They're unrequited. This is torture.
These feelings will be the death of me.
Then something else emerged. Cold laughter, high and unnatural. A blurred outline of something that was not quite human.
And agony. Severus felt it as her childhood memories were ripped violently from her psyche. Even through the spell, he could sense the pain and the violation. The sheer brutality of the assault.
Someone was going through her mind night after night, tearing through her memories. He still couldn't determine who—or what—was doing it, but now he understood. It was enough.
Severus abruptly severed the connection. Both of them struggled to catch their breath. Cassie sagged against the door, trying desperately to ground herself as her mind slowly returned to her.
Severus stared at her. His black eyes were unblinking.
She searched his face, desperately trying to understand what he was thinking. Then her mind caught up with what had happened, and rage consumed her.
"You arrogant son of a bitch!" She slapped him. The crack of her palm against his cheek echoed through the office. The sound was so satisfying that she did it again immediately.
This time, he caught her wrist. "Stop!" Severus demanded.
"I told you no!"
"You left me no choice, Cassie!"
"Fuck off!" She tore her wrist from his grasp. "Move away from the door!"
"That's why you didn't want me to see?" His voice had dropped almost to a whisper.
"I mean it, Severus. Move, or I will make you." Her wand was now in her hand, pointed directly at him.
"Cassie, let's talk—"
"Move!"
This time, he listened and stepped aside. He knew she was at her breaking point, and if he pushed her any further, she would likely hex him.
Cassie stormed toward the doorway. But just before she crossed the threshold, his voice stopped her.
"We have to practice your Occlumency."
She wanted to turn around, wanting to swear at him again. She wanted to tell him he was wrong. But as usual, he wasn't.
She would have to come back. And soon.